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Old 03-16-2012, 12:00 AM
 
395 posts, read 599,632 times
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Sorry to hear your loss. Get some counselling otherwise you may slip into sub-clinical depression.

It took me 4 years to get over the loss of a loved one (via illness).
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Old 03-16-2012, 01:30 AM
 
4,338 posts, read 6,383,683 times
Reputation: 1636
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aptor hours View Post
My father passed away Feb. 9 and I still am not over it Does it get better. I know this is not a unique situation since most people will have to deal with this and my father was to young at 68 to die and gave his all to myself and brother and sister. It almost seems like I am getting worse. The first week after he passed I just truly felt like he would be home next week and he was just away. I have been having mild anxiety attacks and I cannot think of my Dad without tears. I feel guilty for not calling my Mom more since she is sooo sad at losing him. How does one handle all this
My father passed away in 1989 when I was 11.5. I was very shocked. He was 56. Hang in there. Time heals. He is at a better place called heaven. Pray.
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Old 03-16-2012, 06:09 AM
 
Location: Heart of Dixie
1,298 posts, read 1,849,515 times
Reputation: 1583
I hope by now the OP has found some peace. I cannot imagine how difficult it is to loose a parent. Mine are 67 and 64 and not in good health. I can't even force myself to contemplate.
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Old 03-16-2012, 09:13 AM
 
Location: Northern NH
4,551 posts, read 9,859,296 times
Reputation: 3782
I'm still not over it...I have dreams all the tine. My family is still grief. Stricken.
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Old 05-27-2012, 02:16 PM
 
Location: USA
1,895 posts, read 4,039,360 times
Reputation: 1988
My dad was only 44 years old when he died in a car wreck.

I was ten.

I wish there had been grief counseling back then, or some sort of spiritual counseling/guidance.

At ten years old, it was impossible for me to deal with, and I desperately missed having a father - even a STEP-father - while I was growing up --- and I am a girl. Still needed that man in the house.

Condolences to all.

I understand your grief and desperate pain.
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Old 05-27-2012, 02:30 PM
 
Location: NYC
113 posts, read 196,493 times
Reputation: 147
I lost my dad died on July 7 2005 and Iím reminded everyday he isnít here. It hurts just like if it was yesterday. You never heal you just learn and accept to live with it and move on. My condolences.
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Old 05-27-2012, 10:19 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
1,961 posts, read 4,157,306 times
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I lost my dad a month ago to pancreatic cancer. He was only 52 years old.
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Old 05-29-2012, 01:47 PM
 
3,893 posts, read 9,361,850 times
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So many of your dads have died young. I'm so sorry. Here's a site (it's not mine) that has a lot to offer. Dead Dads Club For daughters who have lost their fathers. Peace to you all, xoxo.
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Old 06-03-2012, 07:34 AM
 
Location: West Michigan
12,215 posts, read 7,343,646 times
Reputation: 7039
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aptor hours View Post
I'm still not over it...I have dreams all the tine. My family is still grief. Stricken.
It's only been since February 9th for you and your family. It's unrealistic to think you'd be "over it" at this stage. In the first few months a family is still dealing with the practical matters such as insurance, medical bills, gettng rid of clothing, funeral costs, change in pensions for the surviving spouse,filling a void in your lives, etc., etc. Often the true mourning and letting go doesn't even start until the dust settles from these practical matters. You also have to let your mind have time to process all the coulda's, woulda's and shoulda's that people naturally go through after someone close dies. Depending on how a person dies, this process is longer for some than others. Also don't expect your family to be "over it" until you've gone through all the 'firsts'---first father's day without your dad. First Christmas, his birthday, etc., etc.

Hang in there and know in time things will work itself out and you'll move to a place of acceptance where all your memories of you dad will be happen ones that make you smile.
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Old 06-09-2012, 11:44 AM
 
Location: Glasgow Scotland
14,489 posts, read 11,474,558 times
Reputation: 20971
grief is a strange thing that we all must go through as sometime in our lives.. I think it can be a selfish thing too, depending on what age you are when someone close to you, that you cared about a lot or needed dies.. I was distraught at 10 when my granny died as she was always home, and all her grandkids knew she would have an open door and nice welcome. so I think her death because of my age and how much I needed her seemed harder than my mum and auntie who brought me up dying were.. sounds callous but by that time things had changed in my life.. I still missed them very much and now years later think of them often, but it didnt affect me in the same way.....but I look at it now as part of life and parents die normally before us.. but losing a child I dont think I could ever get over... and feel for anyone who has lost a wee one.. must be devastating...
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