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Old 11-22-2017, 12:28 PM
 
3 posts, read 875 times
Reputation: 10

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So wait, you want to be around people that look like you, but when whites incidentally do it they have to prove they're not racist to you?

You seriously need to stay in NYC, California or Portland, Oregon if you legitimately think this isn't contradictory and hypocritical.
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Old 12-30-2017, 05:30 PM
 
5 posts, read 5,594 times
Reputation: 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by thoreaupoe View Post
So wait, you want to be around people that look like you, but when whites incidentally do it they have to prove they're not racist to you?

You seriously need to stay in NYC, California or Portland, Oregon if you legitimately think this isn't contradictory and hypocritical.

I have no idea how you're getting that from the message I posted.
I do not just want to be around people "who look like me"-- I used the term diversity and that is not just limited to indians! Yes, I do prefer areas that have some diversity. Not only do I find it more interesting, but I like when it's not seen as a big deal to people that I am a minority. On a business trip to Arkansas, I heard more remarks about my race in two weeks than I have been the entire time I've lived in NYC.
I make absolutely no assumption that Hampton Roads is racist or in any way similar to Arkansas, I am simply asking folks for advice on what it's like since I don't know anything about the area. I have lived in several different states across in the U.S. and absolutely see a correlation between acceptance & awareness and diversity.

Before calling me hypocritical, I'd like for you to consider that because I've lived in many regions, I have had the experiences to lead me to ask these questions. And if you haven't had the experience, I understand why you think the way you do.
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Old 01-02-2018, 06:54 PM
 
16 posts, read 15,180 times
Reputation: 16
@Felixtiles, I think you should think hardest about what type of lifestyle you're seeking.

Technically, the Hampton Roads area does have diverse demographics —*it's a huge mix of people from different backgrounds, income levels, etc. However, that does not make it "cosmopolitan" or "progressive" or any kind of "urban melting pot," and I get the sense you're wanting some of that as a single young man.

Your best bet would probably be living in Norfolk (maybe the downtown area or Ghent), which would have more singles under 40s than most of the other areas. Still, even there, you could not expect any of the culture, amenities, social options, etc you might find in major cities like DC or Boston, or even, say Cleveland.

And yes, the military is a pervasive, defining influence in this region—many people are connected to it by their jobs or families. If you're not used to that, it could be a bit of a culture shift.

Personally, I think a move like this would work best if you're a particularly social and resourceful person who is prepared to work at finding your own "scene." But if you're just passively expecting things to fall into place, this area probably won't offer you much.
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Old 10-03-2018, 05:21 PM
 
9 posts, read 3,450 times
Reputation: 10
I know it has been a little over a year since you posted, but my advice is to not move to South Hampton Roads. I am considered a "minority", am originally from Boston, MA, have lived in 4 other states and of all of them, I've found a lot of what I call "silent-racism" here... people won't usually call you a racial slur to your face, but the contempt they show in their body language and who they favor is quite evident (at least to me). I'd leave if my young daughter didn't need her dad, but alas... she does. So here I sit until she's 18. lol Pray for me, please.
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Old 10-05-2018, 03:04 AM
 
Location: California x North Carolina (soon)...
3,322 posts, read 2,243,861 times
Reputation: 3662
Quote:
Originally Posted by rumi_thoughts View Post
I know it has been a little over a year since you posted, but my advice is to not move to South Hampton Roads. I am considered a "minority", am originally from Boston, MA, have lived in 4 other states and of all of them, I've found a lot of what I call "silent-racism" here... people won't usually call you a racial slur to your face, but the contempt they show in their body language and who they favor is quite evident (at least to me). I'd leave if my young daughter didn't need her dad, but alas... she does. So here I sit until she's 18. lol Pray for me, please.
A lot of the locals will contest that there is hidden racism here. There are places in this country where the discrimination is more blatant and in your face, and the truth is most people can't recognize racism unless its overt and loud and purposely noticeable...

I agree with you 100%. But I've seen many worse places, even within Virginia...

I'm originally from California, spent most of my years around NoVa and Richmond, and neither of those three areas are void of racism...

It's alright here. I'm a bigger city personality, so it is a little small and too small-townish here (there is a ceiling in the personality of the people here; very "whatever happens, happens" type of attitude), but it's nice enough. I'm not one of the transplants who hates it here. We're likely out of here next summer, barring some amazing and unforeseen developments. But I'll miss it here. I hate the Peninsula, and the outer cities bore me to death, but VB and Norfolk have grown on me, even with their limitations...
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