My Haole Boy (Hilo, Waipahu, Waianae: real estate, renting, broker)

[Sorcerer68]

Originally Posted by Jungjohann

I think the "huge family, aren't they all" statement speaks volumes.

Aloha and okolemaluna

Every last local kid in Naalehu had many, many family members. It was a special kind of place. I went to two other schools like this. This was not a sweeping generalisation in this case but a statement of fact. I know how that sounded and I didn't mean it that way. It was a fact of my life. If you've never been singled out for no other reason than the color of your skin and beaten, taunted and tortured on a daily basis you have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. You're on Maui and it's 2007 and you're getting things second hand from employees. I'm telling you my experiences first hand that ran from 1974 when I started school and got beaten up the first day and abused by a teacher to 1981 when we left. This was my childhood experience. I was a young kid who didn't cause trouble and this made my childhood hell. I was blonde, blue eyed and refused to speak Pidgin and this made me a paraiah. Aside from that I learned Hawaiian and did all I could to learn about Hawaiian history. Every time I tried to make friends with a local kid, the results were disastrous. One day I went to talk to a friend I made the day before and him and his father threw rocks at me as I walked in their yard. I had years of this. When I returned to the mainland, it all miraculously stopped but I had what was basically PTSD by then. In my adult life it made me very sensitive to racism, xenophobia and the like. Now as a 38 year-old white male, people ask me how I can possibly know what racism feels like. They have no idea.

Before you invalidate me, stop and think what I might have gone through. It was years of hell.

[Jungjohann]

I'm not trying to "invalidate" your statements, I'm just saying that I've had many employees over the past ten years, got to know all of them rather well, and never once did I hear of their kids being beaten up by locals. Just the normal stuff, but evidently nothing like what you went through. As I mentioned before, I used to dread going to catholic school on the mainland, and getting beaten up on a fairly regular basis by the nice christian boys. Go figure, and ha awi mai imaha pohaku po'o. Now if I were taunted, tortured and beaten on a daily basis, was abused by a teacher, and had a neighbor throwing rocks at me, I'ld probably inform my teachers, the principal, my parents, and the local police. Sorry for your misfortune.

Aloha

[Jonah K]

Originally Posted by Jungjohann

Now if I were taunted, tortured and beaten on a daily basis, was abused by a teacher, and had a neighbor throwing rocks at me, I'ld probably inform my teachers, the principal, my parents, and the local police.

Considering how interconnected some of the families are in Hawai'i, that might not help much. If the abusive teacher was the principal's brother's sister-in-law whose second cousin was the chief of police whose uncle's neighbor just happened to have a "rock quarry" in the backyard, any complaints might fall on "deaf ears."

On the flip side, if the family of the abuse victim were tuned in enough to call "Tutu Lokelani" in Pahala or "Uncle Nainoa" in Waimea, any problems could often be resolved within hours.

Although it's changing, Hawai'i is still a small place.

[Jungjohann]

I think the insinuation here is that local familes condone or encourage their kids to beat up haoles, or, if it does occur, they simply turn their heads and ignore it. In my years here I've never seen that to be the case. And kids are going to get in fights, regardless of their ethnic backround. At least in Hawaii there aren't kids running around and shooting each other all the time. That takes place where?? Oh yea, the mainland. Hawaiian folks are some of the most generous people I've ever met.

Aloha and okolemaluna

[Jonah K]

Originally Posted by Jungjohann

I think the insinuation here is that local familes condone or encourage their kids to beat up haoles, or, if it does occur, they simply turn their heads and ignore it. In my years here I've never seen that to be the case. And kids are going to get in fights, regardless of their ethnic backround. At least in Hawaii there aren't kids running around and shooting each other all the time. That takes place where?? Oh yea, the mainland. Hawaiian folks are some of the most generous people I've ever met.

Aloha and okolemaluna

While Maui might have to import its gang members, O'ahu has "home-grown" ones.

Meda Chesney-Lind (a professor at UHM and authority on gangs in Hawai'i) compiled a report a few years ago for the Hawai'i State Legislature that might prove somewhat enlightening. Here's a link...
http://www.chesneylind.com/reports/gangs2003.htm

A simple chat with some of the workers at the HSCADV or a visit to one of the state-funded, Hawaiian "finishing schools" might offer a different perspective on the "generosity" of some Hawaiian folks.

Local families in Hawai'i aren't perfect...

[robert simmons]

There are bullies everywhere. Born and growing up a liberal in redneck Jacksonville, Florida, I had to learn to kick redneck butt as part of my education. Personally I think institutionalized education sucks. Who wants to be institutionalized. Its designed to condition us to a regimented lifestyle, suitable for factories and offices. Furthermore the emphasis seems to be 'getting a job' vs doing your own thing. I was out surfing and a young vacationer in the water said 2 more years and he'd be able to have a 3 week vacation. It sounded alot like prisoners getting 'time-off w/good behavior'. The boy obviously believes he will have a tomorrow and of that there is no guarantee. Homeschool your kids, even if you have to make less money. It's easy, just explain everything to your kids all the time. Pause the movie to explain what's going on, what that particular phrase, saying means, the message. Don't let modern culture educate them, you'll regret it. If you really love your kids, be w/them all the time. Actually have a close relationship. People grow together or they grow apart. And to bullies everywhere, we know you're weak, no matter how you try to cover it w/violence. You want love, give love, don't be such mental sissies. Get over your bad/neglected love lives, join us in Aloha.

[Hobart]

If my kids are lucky enough to get into Punahou, do you think there is a lot of racism there? FYI, my kids are Eurasian (Taiwan/European), but look Caucasian.

[Madison50]

[quote=

On the flip side, if the family of the abuse victim were tuned in enough to call "Tutu Lokelani" in Pahala or "Uncle Nainoa" in Waimea, any problems could often be resolved within hours.

Although it's changing, Hawai'i is still a small place. [/quote]

Yup that about says it all!!!
True indeed, because "no" local family wants shame brought to their hale. My family is from here, we are haoles, but if I made trouble and brought shame on my family when I was a kid, trust me I woulda gotten one dirty lickin'. Ohh I mean I did-hahahaha.
Look, I think anywhere you go you're gonna find ignorance and hate, anywhere. Don't underestimate the power of ALOHA, it's here and it's real and just be impeccable with your word, you'll be fine. There are lots of amazing people in these precious islands of ours.

[AreYouSerious]

Originally Posted by Jonah K

Considering how interconnected some of the families are in Hawai'i, that might not help much. If the abusive teacher was the principal's brother's sister-in-law whose second cousin was the chief of police whose uncle's neighbor just happened to have a "rock quarry" in the backyard, any complaints might fall on "deaf ears."

On the flip side, if the family of the abuse victim were tuned in enough to call "Tutu Lokelani" in Pahala or "Uncle Nainoa" in Waimea, any problems could often be resolved within hours.

Although it's changing, Hawai'i is still a small place.

I agree. Tell the police that is funny. I am a black female from Cali, and after years of moving all over the World being active duty AF. I have seen racism growing up because we were light with long hair, in Texas, in Korea, all over there is always someone. Anyhow, I was medically discharged and moved to the one placed I have always dreamed and never been, Hawaii.

At first it was good, it got better when I actually became a home owner until a new neighbor moved in and aparently the darkness of my skin was an issue. I went to the condo association, the town assciation and even the police. The police tell me to get a restaining order, I do. However after all this time it has yet to be served. But strangely these "locals" (not hawaiian) seems to strangely never be home anymore and the police never seem to be able to serve them. The police refused to give my order back so that I can hire a private server and unknowingly to me it turns out that this woman whose 17 year old child threatens to hurt me (17, is hardly a child), went to school with them. So needless to say it was not a shock that my neighbor told me the day I turned in the order they were talking to her at her home, my other neighbor (actual Hawaiian blood line) happened to be home early that day.

Now, they have threatened to beat my ***** and kill me, but the cops come to my house and tell me not to call them anymore because he did not hit me. Despite the fact I have a small child that means nothing to them. Despite the fact the woman has run from her home with her daughter (8) in her arms because her son has beat the crap out of her again. Which is a personal matter (at least here, despite the small petite girl could never fend off that boy). Despite the fact that if he attacks me or my daughter I was told by the police that if I hit him back then I will be arrested and my child would be taken because I would be charged with child abuse and I am a child abuser. Now any other place in the world a person can be charged, a kid can even be charged with terroristic threats. Here in beautiful Hawaii, on the lovely island of O'ahu your not local, you may as well give up the dream of paradise. Not because of the Hawaiians per say, just simply because of the good ole boy syndrom. Which is fairly unfortunate because diversity is what makes the world so beautiful

[GirlinAZ]

Originally Posted by Sorcerer68

I moved back and forth. In Hawaii it was merciless. They'd surround me like a pack of Jackels and beat the crap out of me one or several days a week. When I came back to the mainland it stopped completely except for the odd, random older bully. I was back and forth a few times growing up. Coloring had everything to do with it. My dark haired, brown eyed, olive skinned haole friends did fine. Nobody picked on them. My white blonde hair, clear blue eyes and very white skin made me a target. I never sought trouble and always treated everyone with respect but my childhood there was a nightmare. Naalehu was the lonliest for me. The teachers treated me in a "separate but equal" fashion. When we moved to Waimea it got a little better until a huge family (aren't they all?) decided to have beef with me (like I said, I was quiet and respectful) and I finally started ditching school because I couldn't take it anymore. I'd take a good book and I'd sit on top of a hill until it was time to go home. I'd often hitchike so I wouldn't get beaten up on the bus or getting off it. Sometimes I'd walk the few miles to school on the busy highway. At least I had friends as there were some other haole kids to play with. That was grades 4-6. My friends in private schools like Parker or HPA said this didn't happen to them.
Mahalo Nui Loa

As a mother, this story breaks my heart. At that young of age to have to hitchhike or walk miles alone is so scary and sad. I hope this hasn't colored you as a person and that it is not something that has affected you for life. It is too bad kids are so mean. I have a much younger step brother, who is overweight and he gets made fun of a lot on the mainland. I don't know how to make this change. Kids are cruel no matter where you are. It seems as though this is just one more example of how bad kids can be to each other. If every parent had regular conversations with their kids about bullying and how wrong it is, this would help-not end it, but help. Aloha and best wishes, Julie