Your story: Was it worth it to move to Hawaii? (schools, moving to)

[Norhjerseygirl]

No one has ever said anything derogatory to me since I moved here 18 months ago. I am from NJ and I would've noticed. I live in Kailua where a few Asian people tell me I am lucky as it is very Haole there. My neighbors are not Haole and they did not roll out the welcome mat. One neighbor suggested I have a BBQ; he likes parties. His house is falling down and 3 families live there. He smokes pakalolo a lot. My other neighbor complained I moved her rocks (we all try to keep people from parking in front of our homes with our big rocks). My across the street neighbors always make us a gift basket for Christmas (local kine goodies) and they have a huge fence around their home. The one with the rock issue is widowed, works security at the airport (overnight shift) and is from NJ originally.

It's all perspective. Everyone works and tries to get along. I know it is hard to be new. A co worker of mine got spit on by a cyclist while he was walking in town and the spitter said "Go Home" - it happens. It is rare. There are so many transplants. Between the military, newbies to fill all the jobs and the tourists; I would be sick of it as well, if I was given the chance.

I find people full of Aloha, full of compassion and happy to meet interesting, friendly, happy people. Their way is different but almost better. The locals are about their land, their heritage, their culture and they are so family oriented. Letting their keiki run wild is another issue. Having enough money to afford to live here is another!!!!

I feel very blessed to experience this unique experience and once you accept this place you can live here. Checkout Girlfriendscafe (not sure if it is dot net or org or com) for girlfriends. I have made alot of friends in the same boat that way. Pau from this happy haole

[Frangi914]

Originally Posted by Brav989

It's called assimilation

OMG the Borg are loose and living in Hawaii!

[Twinster]

RAINSWEPTKAYLA, I'm sorry you had such a hard time on Oahu. I've never lived on Oahu. I can tell you that all of the islands are not that way. Regarding your comment, "...it's a white hate fest. anyone that trys to downplay this is not being honest." I wanted to respond to this since I didn't mention anything about racism in my previous post. It is NOT a "white hate fest" on the Big Island and I am being very honest about this. I'm sorry that these situations still occur in Hawaii. I know they happen but there is no reason to think it is happening as badly as it did to you on Oahu. Yes, there is racism and I was victim to it somewhat too. The things that made some of the locals dislike me were the same things that made my husband's job easier. At one job, I went in willing to teach people new things and more efficient ways to do things. My boss loved it but co-workers were threatened. My husband did the same thing at his technical job and his co-workers loved it and saw the benefits of it. He never saw any racism in the 7 years we lived there. I had several other jobs (Kona, Waikoloa, Kamuela (Waimea)) where I worked with mostly local people and I had no problems at all. I should add here that I'm very white skinned (Scottish/Irish) and so is my husband. We learned some of the local pidgin, local customs and treated everyone the way we would want to be treated.

[pwowner]

Originally Posted by NVplumber

Hmmm. Have to git a bit of a giggle over all the "haole" go home" stuff. Whatever! I have been around Native Americans's (they still call themselves American Indians, by the way) my whole life. Good friends and good times still bein' had! Oh sure.. we have our jokes bout Custer had it Comin' Eh Heh ...Not that far...( if you don;t get it you gotta have been there) I've been called ****** , white bread, cracker and pecker wood, ( never by Indians) Washichue, white eye, bluecoat and a few others by Indians...( All friends of mine) Lol ...just never call me late fer supper! "Haole"....gimme a break! Been raked over the coals ( literally) just makin' friends. Given as good as I got..and we still all share a fire at hunting camp. .....Go figger. Whats wrong with us?....don't we know we's supposed to hate each other? Hmmm....that news never got out this far I reckon. Pass the jug and stoke the fire .....The Sun will rise tomorow....yah te heh (aloha) to all!

I was thinking the same things as I was reading these posts. I, too, live on an Indian Reservation and am married to a Native American. I couldn't help but see the similarities between here & Hawaii. Sure, no matter where you go, you see racism. No one is immune. But, you just have to go back to the fact that the person perpetrating the racism is the idiot. Not you. I, for one, wouldn't (and won't) let it stop me from relocating there. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone grew a brain and figured out how boring this life would be without people from every color, race, religion, etc. It would be like only being able to see purple.

[IntoTheMystic]

Here's what I've found to be true.

If you live in Hawaii, and are happy to live in Hawaii, you don't want to hear any negatives.

If you've decided you want to move to Hawaii, you don't want to hear any negatives.

Just because it didn't happen to you doesn't mean it didn't happen.

Yes, many places have their problems, but we are here to talk about Hawaii. We all know about the wonderful side of Hawaii. It's important on this forum to present all sides, because it's damn $$$ to move back.

[HankDfrmSD]

Originally Posted by pwowner

how boring this life would be without people from every color, race, religion, etc. It would be like only being able to see purple.

Purple is very beautiful. The only way you can get it is by mixing red and blue.

Hank

[globetrotter]

I've gotten a good chuckle out of the posts about feeling racism. Welcome to the world of the minority. A large percentage of the white population has never felt racism. Once felt, though, it is unmistakable. It's like cat pee - there isn't anything else it could possibly be. The maltreatment the world over of minorities does not justify anyone's racist behavior.

The point is simply this - now that one has felt the pain and rejection endured by millions of people and their ancestors, enlightenment and growth can occur within an altered paradigm. History has a way of repeating itself. Until forgiveness of the perpetrator can be achieved, history will keep repeating. One can create racism, hatred, rejection and fear. Isn't it much easier to create compassion, love and empathy?

[relativeus]

You are so right on globetrotter. I think Caucasian folks do not have a firm grasp on what it means to be racially discriminated against until they they taste it for themselves. Even those of us who know better than to think in terms of racial superiority of any kind, still must be on the receiving end of this type of ignorance in order to get it . I agree that only then can we operate from a point of true understanding and continue to improve upon the world we have inherited.

[tinted]

I have to agree with the two previous posts. I can't believe all this about the extreme racism in Hawaii. White mainlanders are not accustomed to feeling any type of racism, so when experienced, it really sticks with them. My husband is blond haired and blue eyed, and living in West Oahu (one of the more "Hawaiian" areas). Let me tell you...he has never had a single problem. In fact I'm always amazed at how many big Hawaiian and Samoan guys come up to him to just talk story. He now has TONS of local friends out here. The moral of the story: You will receive the same attitude that you put out. Be nice. Don't stare! Definitely don't go around complaining about being "stuck on a rock in the middle of nowhere..." I can't believe how often I hear transplants saying that. Will there still be a handful of jerks? Of course, but there will also be jerks anywhere else you decide to live.

Personally, I believe the people in Hawaii are the best!

[IntoTheMystic]

Originally Posted by tinted

I have to agree with the two previous posts. I can't believe all this about the extreme racism in Hawaii. White mainlanders are not accustomed to feeling any type of racism, so when experienced, it really sticks with them. My husband is blond haired and blue eyed, and living in West Oahu (one of the more "Hawaiian" areas). Let me tell you...he has never had a single problem. In fact I'm always amazed at how many big Hawaiian and Samoan guys come up to him to just talk story. He now has TONS of local friends out here. The moral of the story: You will receive the same attitude that you put out. Be nice. Don't stare! Definitely don't go around complaining about being "stuck on a rock in the middle of nowhere..." I can't believe how often I hear transplants saying that. Will there still be a handful of jerks? Of course, but there will also be jerks anywhere else you decide to live.

Personally, I believe the people in Hawaii are the best!

Again; just because it doesn't happen to you doesn't mean it doesn't happen. What on earth would be the motivation otherwise?


I don't understand why anyone's experience must be disputed. It's all, both the good and the bad, part of the experience.