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Old 06-08-2012, 05:31 PM
 
944 posts, read 1,365,082 times
Reputation: 618

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I have a friend who has a VERY STRONG Funky Oder coming from her vagina region. She is a very sensitive person and I don't want to hurt her feelings. She is also very overweight and now that the warm weather is upon us it is VERY BAD.

The other day I got into my car and it smelled clean and fresh. Once she came into my car it was HORRIFIC where I started gagging and she asked me if I was sick, I open the windows kept the AC on put the peddle to the metal and dropped her off at her home. Once she left my car the stench was no longer/

I spoke to a friend of mine and she explained that women who are obese have a hard time keeping that region clean do to their size and also do to the fact that there is a lot of excess fat, skin that is rubbing and in a dark region where female body fluids run free making it a most area.

I was thinking of sending a anonymous letter to her at work or her home.

if anyone has advise how to address this I appreciate it greatly.

 
Old 06-08-2012, 06:44 PM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,631 posts, read 53,468,042 times
Reputation: 18533
She probably has a yeast infection in the folds of her abdomen. That creates a truly foul odor. She would be aware of it b/c it causes red, raw skin that hurts a lot. If this is the case, she can put vaginal yeast cream on it and it will clear up.

Another possibility is she is unable to wipe properly. If she is truly obese, she may not be able to reach herself. I worked with a woman who had brown and yellow stains on the backs of her skirts. She was the boss and very unpleasant so no one said a thing. You would think she would see the stains in the wash....

Depending on how much you value her friendship, I would just tell her gently when you two are alone. Just say, I have to tell you something that may hurt your feelingsut I think you need to know. Then just tell her.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 07:21 PM
 
944 posts, read 1,365,082 times
Reputation: 618
Quote:
Originally Posted by SouthernBelleInUtah View Post
She probably has a yeast infection in the folds of her abdomen. That creates a truly foul odor. She would be aware of it b/c it causes red, raw skin that hurts a lot. If this is the case, she can put vaginal yeast cream on it and it will clear up.

Another possibility is she is unable to wipe properly. If she is truly obese, she may not be able to reach herself. I worked with a woman who had brown and yellow stains on the backs of her skirts. She was the boss and very unpleasant so no one said a thing. You would think she would see the stains in the wash....

Depending on how much you value her friendship, I would just tell her gently when you two are alone. Just say, I have to tell you something that may hurt your feelingsut I think you need to know. Then just tell her.
thank you for this info. I'm concerned about telling her face to face because she is a very emotional person and I don't know how far her emotions will go.. She has a VERY BAD attitude when people correct her about other things at work.


I was also thinking about dropping her as friend.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 07:28 PM
 
1,915 posts, read 3,208,696 times
Reputation: 2996
Not to be gross, but I wouldn't hang with any of my female friends that had crotch rot. Nor would I be friends with a smelly guy.

Hygiene isn't something that I would school her in. Just "get busy" and she'll move on.

We have an employee at my job that stinks to high heaven. A few people brought this up to HR and were told it was a "personal issue." This is in the healthcare field.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 10:13 PM
 
Location: Brawndo-Thirst-Mutilator-Nation
15,145 posts, read 15,198,298 times
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Wow, tough spot......that rotting odor has to rank up there as the worst.

I have to say, I occasionally have walked past an old lady in a public place.....nearly knocked me over........that R888888 P8888 smell.......oh-my.

Stinky old men usually reek of fermented body odor.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 10:21 PM
 
Location: southern born and southern bred
12,480 posts, read 14,364,838 times
Reputation: 19530
I think it's better for a friend to have a frank conversation with another friend rather than end the friendship over the matter-unresolved. I worked with a lady once who had bad odor and some snickered behind her back about it ( ) and others avoided her; meaning this lady had virtually no friends. It took a brave co-worker to tactfully take her aside and speak to her about it. She said the lady acted totally surprised and seemed to have no clue. Turns out she also had sinus issues and her sense of smell wasn't very good. She immediately remedied the situation.
I am astounded HR in the health care field won't address such issues.
If you truly are good friends and you care enough about this person--please tell her. It can be done tactfully and her dignity will be intact.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 11:01 PM
 
944 posts, read 1,365,082 times
Reputation: 618
Quote:
Originally Posted by PippySkiddles View Post
I think it's better for a friend to have a frank conversation with another friend rather than end the friendship over the matter-unresolved. I worked with a lady once who had bad odor and some snickered behind her back about it ( ) and others avoided her; meaning this lady had virtually no friends. It took a brave co-worker to tactfully take her aside and speak to her about it. She said the lady acted totally surprised and seemed to have no clue. Turns out she also had sinus issues and her sense of smell wasn't very good. She immediately remedied the situation.
I am astounded HR in the health care field won't address such issues.
If you truly are good friends and you care enough about this person--please tell her. It can be done tactfully and her dignity will be intact.
Not sure if your read my reply to another poster who gave about the same advise. This woman is VERY VERY Sensitive, she can't take anyone correcting her at work or advise given to her outside of work so that is why i thought about writing a anonymous note or just calling it a day and not be friends with her. But thank you for your input.
 
Old 06-08-2012, 11:17 PM
 
Location: Sacramento
5,057 posts, read 7,263,515 times
Reputation: 3492
I has a similar situation years ago. This lady was morbidly obese, very poor and frankly lived in a filthy hoarder-style apartment. She was married with small children, and the situation was heartbreaking. A couple of us took her aside & talked to her about it. She knew about the smell, had been told on several occasions, but was either ignorant about the solution or could not afford hygiene cleansing supplies. We had to break it down into bite sized solutions, and explain exactly how to clean herself, and what types of products to use. It was a really difficult talk, but she seemed to appreciate that we did talk to her, instead of avoiding her. She really was a sweetie. Things changed for a little while, and then returned to the status quo. I don't really think she had the intelligence to understand the need for cleanliness. At that point, we had to decide to accept her or not. We accepted her & lived with it. As difficult as it was, I'm glad we did...to be able to show someone who was difficult to love, true unconditional love. Totally worth it!
 
Old 06-08-2012, 11:28 PM
 
2,540 posts, read 3,300,645 times
Reputation: 5538
Quote:
Originally Posted by SouthernBelleInUtah View Post
She probably has a yeast infection in the folds of her abdomen. That creates a truly foul odor. She would be aware of it b/c it causes red, raw skin that hurts a lot. If this is the case, she can put vaginal yeast cream on it and it will clear up.

Another possibility is she is unable to wipe properly. If she is truly obese, she may not be able to reach herself. I worked with a woman who had brown and yellow stains on the backs of her skirts. She was the boss and very unpleasant so no one said a thing. You would think she would see the stains in the wash....

Depending on how much you value her friendship, I would just tell her gently when you two are alone. Just say, I have to tell you something that may hurt your feelingsut I think you need to know. Then just tell her.

oh god, i'd never think you'd see that in a healthy mentally stable person in the first world...eeeeewww
 
Old 06-08-2012, 11:35 PM
 
Location: southern born and southern bred
12,480 posts, read 14,364,838 times
Reputation: 19530
Quote:
Originally Posted by =Lavender= View Post
Not sure if your read my reply to another poster who gave about the same advise. This woman is VERY VERY Sensitive, she can't take anyone correcting her at work or advise given to her outside of work so that is why i thought about writing a anonymous note or just calling it a day and not be friends with her. But thank you for your input.

ok, well her sensitive nature + body odor= no friends. So I would risk hurting her feelings,which she will get over. But that's just me. You know her so do what you feel is best but do something soon. This lady needs it spelled out to her so she can retain some dignity and some friends.
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