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I feel absolutely terrible for what your father is going through but from what you just described to me here, it sounds as if he's CHOSEN to be this way either subconsciously or by will. Most of the undiagnosable diseases in the world are manifestations of hatred of one's self or others, unforgiveness, insecurity, sorrow, or any other type of negative emotion or feeling of the soul or the mind over time that then poisons the body as a result!
Well, he didn't choose to get hit with a full time bad version of vertigo and bad balance a decade ago and he didn't choose for his spine to become fused together (stenosis, etc.).
BUT, I get your point - given that those things happened, he is experiencing the natural sorrow which comes along with loss and reacting as most of us would.
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My dad, who has never had a major illness (no heart attacks, etc.) is aging and is accepting the changes that come along with it.
BUT, one thing he cannot accept. He feels terrible most all of the time - weak, etc.
He has been to at least 20 medical appointments and there is nothing wrong with him that isn't expected in an 86 year old. All they do is order more tests - the results of which mean nothing. Even if they found something, he is not going to subject himself to surgery at his age.
My thinking is that he needs some kind of "cocktail" similar to what they give some hospice patients....maybe some type of infusions, HGH, stimulants (long acting), etc. - but there does not seem to be any sort of docs that practice this very basic type of medicine.
(he lives in Miami Beach).
It seems cruel that he should sit hour after hour feeling terrible if some type of drug program could help him - steroids, stims, opioids (he's done them before with no problems), maybe Oxygen.......
As you can tell - I'm not a doctor. But his situation is one where we don't need to "fix" the car - it can't be fixed at this point, it's an old car. What we need is radiator stop leak and other treatments so that the car can function on a day to day basis and have a reason to live on.
Short of something like this I have a feeling he'll be asking me for that one-way trip to Switzerland soon or take matters into his own hands. I know I personally couldn't live that way - knowing that every day lacks pleasure.
Any hints? Tips? Experiences? Or do most just practice the usual medicine where they spend all their time until end of days looking for "something wrong"?
You might want to ask over at the Caregiving forum. They have so much experience with the elderly.
My dad, who has never had a major illness (no heart attacks, etc.) is aging and is accepting the changes that come along with it.
BUT, one thing he cannot accept. He feels terrible most all of the time - weak, etc.
He has been to at least 20 medical appointments and there is nothing wrong with him that isn't expected in an 86 year old. All they do is order more tests - the results of which mean nothing. Even if they found something, he is not going to subject himself to surgery at his age.
My thinking is that he needs some kind of "cocktail" similar to what they give some hospice patients....maybe some type of infusions, HGH, stimulants (long acting), etc. - but there does not seem to be any sort of docs that practice this very basic type of medicine.
(he lives in Miami Beach).
It seems cruel that he should sit hour after hour feeling terrible if some type of drug program could help him - steroids, stims, opioids (he's done them before with no problems), maybe Oxygen.......
As you can tell - I'm not a doctor. But his situation is one where we don't need to "fix" the car - it can't be fixed at this point, it's an old car. What we need is radiator stop leak and other treatments so that the car can function on a day to day basis and have a reason to live on.
Short of something like this I have a feeling he'll be asking me for that one-way trip to Switzerland soon or take matters into his own hands. I know I personally couldn't live that way - knowing that every day lacks pleasure.
Any hints? Tips? Experiences? Or do most just practice the usual medicine where they spend all their time until end of days looking for "something wrong"?
HGH u mention...human growth hormone may be able to make him seem 70 again. It does wonders for all the seniors I met while at this gym in Boca, FL. They are in great shape and no pain. The drs that would give it to you would be Age specialist? That is a guess. You can google hgh from a real dr in Miami and you are at the center of its popularity. I don't know if you wanted him to be young again or a death cocktail, the latter is on you and if it is legal in your state.
My doctor says if you are on a statin and having side effects, get on a good CO-Q10.
He's done the CO-Q10 for years.
I'm 64 and just stopped taking my low dose blood pressure meds....that means I am on zero "real" prescribed drugs on a regular basis. I think I like it that way. I do have low dose tylenol/codeine (was in heavy construction my whole life), but frankly it hardly works anymore - I destroyed more than it can fix. But all is well and I can walk miles, sail, climb ladders, etc.
The tough part with Dad is that not only do you have to have potential solutions - but he needs to implement them and...ideally...have a partner (doc, etc) who helps. I think it's very possible he will just slip into not caring at all since the pain (anguish) is so bad.
He is the type of person who always claimed he would "take care of things" at the end...but I think many people who plan this have a hard time when they realize they are part of a couple. That is, I think older couples hold each other up to some degree and even if he wanted to check out he might not for that reason. Besides, I hear it takes a couple months now for the Switzerland trip.
With nothing terminal and not even hospitalized, there is no state in the USA which would allow "consumer choice" in terms of life or death.
Good old Vitamin complex with everything in it would help. There is depression with getting older. I see it in my friends who are 20 yrs older then me. I even see it in me at age 64. I hate to admit that. I don't want to get old- I don't think anyone does.
Would your dad enjoy meeting new friends? Senior Center?
My dad, who has never had a major illness (no heart attacks, etc.) is aging and is accepting the changes that come along with it.
BUT, one thing he cannot accept. He feels terrible most all of the time - weak, etc.
He has been to at least 20 medical appointments and there is nothing wrong with him that isn't expected in an 86 year old. All they do is order more tests - the results of which mean nothing. Even if they found something, he is not going to subject himself to surgery at his age.
My thinking is that he needs some kind of "cocktail" similar to what they give some hospice patients....maybe some type of infusions, HGH, stimulants (long acting), etc. - but there does not seem to be any sort of docs that practice this very basic type of medicine.
(he lives in Miami Beach).
It seems cruel that he should sit hour after hour feeling terrible if some type of drug program could help him - steroids, stims, opioids (he's done them before with no problems), maybe Oxygen.......
As you can tell - I'm not a doctor. But his situation is one where we don't need to "fix" the car - it can't be fixed at this point, it's an old car. What we need is radiator stop leak and other treatments so that the car can function on a day to day basis and have a reason to live on.
Short of something like this I have a feeling he'll be asking me for that one-way trip to Switzerland soon or take matters into his own hands. I know I personally couldn't live that way - knowing that every day lacks pleasure.
Any hints? Tips? Experiences? Or do most just practice the usual medicine where they spend all their time until end of days looking for "something wrong"?
I know what I would do and have discussed it with my wife and put similar instructions in my living will/health care proxy. But that's a highly personal preference and may not hold up to real-world events some 26 years from now.
I know what I would do and have discussed it with my wife and put similar instructions in my living will/health care proxy. But that's a highly personal preference and may not hold up to real-world events some 26 years from now.
That's part of the situation - Dad is not going to have ANY surgery no matter what....and I think that is an informed (and possibly smart) decision to make at that age. For example, some back surgeries have been suggested...which would take 6 mo. to recover from AND...the stats on the surgeries are no better than the stats for those who don't get surgeries.
My Grandfather, who was a HEAVY drinker, retired at 65 and partied until he was 76. He was sitting in his Italian kitchen with some friends and raised a toast....and fell over dead. No one cried....I think we all wished for the same kind of end ourselves.
I doubt my dad is looking for any heavy social interaction at this point. He was always "the boss" or "the advice giver" and never just a dude who played cards (which is about the only activity I can imagine him doing now).
He reads extensively - has a fairly large family that loves him deeply and talks to him regularly...and watches movies. Again, if his basic "head" can be fixed so he feels right I think he will be OK with the physical decline...at least for a while.
Keep working with the doctors it might take sometime to figure out the problem. My grandfather had a pacemaker put in, and for almost 2 years he felt weak he kept going back to his cardiologist just told him had nothing to do with the pace maker. His GP decided to send him to a different cardiologist who had the pace maker manufacture send a representative in to check the programming turned out the pacemaker was programmed incorrectly when it would activate it pumped the chambers so the blood pressure would drop too much.
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