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Old Today, 12:48 AM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
10,843 posts, read 3,528,691 times
Reputation: 13073

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TFW46 View Post
I looked for the OP's answer to this question but didnt see one.

CGab, have you been paying close attention to whether your daughter goes to the bathroom or somewhere else (garage, her room, etc) to perhaps throw up after eating or after drinking the Ensure?
I'm pretty sure she's not throwing up. She very rarely vomits when she gets sick (unlike my other daughter) and when she does, you would think she's dying, so I doubt she's doing that. She's eating, just not eating the same amount of junk as she used to. Now she'd rather have fruit then a cookie, which is fine with me. She eats a good breakfast, but has told me she doesn't eat that much for lunch. That's understandable too because she leaves the house for school at 8:30 and lunch is 10:30 already. She's typically pretty hungry when she gets home at 4 and wants to know when dinner will be ready.

emm74 brought up a good point. She'll be due for her annual physical soon since her birthday is coming up, so I'll get that scheduled. That way we can rule out anything health wise as well.


I appreciate everyone's post!

 
Old Today, 07:17 AM
 
Location: Early America
1,552 posts, read 735,036 times
Reputation: 3317
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katarina Witt View Post
3) is very concerning. That's how anorexia starts. They're going to "clean up" their diet, eat more healthily, etc. What it means is they're restricting food. Personal experience with one of my daughters.
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders....signs-symptoms
"Refuses to eat certain foods, progressing to restrictions against whole categories of food (e.g., no carbohydrates, etc.)"

It's not concerning if she replaced junk food with healthier options, and that is what it sounds like. Healthier options account for lower calorie intake. She might need more calories during this growth spurt which the OP is trying to address with Ensure.



Quote:
Originally Posted by CGab View Post
I'm pretty sure she's not throwing up. She very rarely vomits when she gets sick (unlike my other daughter) and when she does, you would think she's dying, so I doubt she's doing that. She's eating, just not eating the same amount of junk as she used to. Now she'd rather have fruit then a cookie, which is fine with me. She eats a good breakfast, but has told me she doesn't eat that much for lunch. That's understandable too because she leaves the house for school at 8:30 and lunch is 10:30 already. She's typically pretty hungry when she gets home at 4 and wants to know when dinner will be ready.

emm74 brought up a good point. She'll be due for her annual physical soon since her birthday is coming up, so I'll get that scheduled. That way we can rule out anything health wise as well.


I appreciate everyone's post!

She sounds like a great kid.
 
Old Today, 07:21 AM
 
255 posts, read 378,042 times
Reputation: 247
TAKE HER TO THE DR NOW. Katarina Witt is right...cutting out junk food and starting to eat more healthy is the first sign of anorexia. I know. My daughter struggled with an eating disorder, starting at age 13, for four years. It started with her eating more "healthy". She lost weight and stopped getting her period.

Dancers, cheerleaders, gymnasts, models, etc are especially prone to eating disorders, as are highly driven, type A people. This is your child, and you will NEVER regret looking into this ASAP. Two months can make a big difference in getting a potential problem looked into. If it's not a problem, you haven't lost anything except a copay.

I hope it turns out that there isn't a problem. I am here for your if there is... It's a hard road for everyone. Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness, and take a toll on your body, including heart problems and thinning of the bones. They affect your relationships with your friends and family, often causing depression, anxiety and alienation.

Our society puts such an emphasis on being thin, when it is so so dangerous to lose too much weight. I would cringe when I'd overhear someone telling my daughter how thin and great she looked.

A final note: this is not your fault. You may read things or hear things that always blame the mom for a child getting an eating disorder. Nothing could be further from the truth, and it's very painful to hear. If you're re like me, you will examine everything you've ever done or said, wondering if you made things worse, but in reality, your will make yourself crazy by doing this. Focus on your job to help her get better. Good luck!!
 
Old Today, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Forests of Maine
30,052 posts, read 48,123,221 times
Reputation: 18079
When I was in highschool and wrestling my BMI was 13.

My parents were concerned about my weight, they had me consume a spoon of molasses every day. I dont think it had any effect, but it did not hurt anything to try.
 
Old Today, 08:58 AM
 
5,776 posts, read 3,310,078 times
Reputation: 6778
Please be very careful with this. My daughter played sports; Travel and School Soccer, School Field Hockey, Travel and School Softball, and later JV Boys Ice Hockey. Back then she was around 105 lbs and 5'4.

She ate a LOT (dinner leftovers in school). Her Teachers could not believe how she could be so skinny and eat as much as she did. They started following her into the Restroom to see if she was vomiting up her food. Daughter would coming home CRYING. Tell them to leave me alone.

I got a note from the school to discuss her "problem". So I went there in my size 0 jeans, size 5 shoes, and even brought the family photo album with me showing my 5'8, 135 Dad, and 4'10, 85 lb Grandma. That wasn't necessary. As soon as the Teacher saw me, she said, "Oh, your daughter looks just like you". End of discussion and they left her alone after this.

I do not know about gymnastics, but all these other sports required physicals in order to play. Doctors never said anything about her weight. They all signed the form for her to play. Daughter was also a very skinny baby. My in-laws always complained about that all the time. When I told her Pediatrician what they said, he told me to look in the mirror at MYSELF. He said she was healthy, and as strong as an ox.

Oh, I know about about being skinny. When I was a kid, doctor gave me some kind of pill to increase my appetite to put on weight because I was considered underweight by the charts. It made me vomit and I lost weight. Dad was furious over this. Leave her alone, he told the doctor.

OP, as long as her doctor says she is healthy, stop worrying. My daughter is now in her 30's, mother of 2 boys, and is a size 1 or 3. She never put on the pounds. BTW, she still plays ice hockey pick up games, with MEN. I am now 70 and I can still fit in my wedding dress from 44 years ago. I'm 5"1, and just under 100 lbs. Most I have ever weighted in my life was 129 pounds when I was 9 months pregnant.

Edit: Nix the Ensure. Just eat healthy foods.
 
Old Today, 09:10 AM
 
Location: Winterpeg
708 posts, read 257,174 times
Reputation: 2885
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo48 View Post

Edit: Nix the Ensure. Just eat healthy foods.
This. And everything else this poster said.

My family is the opposite - all big boned, muscled, chubby people. I was never going to be 100lbs at 5'2". My mom spent every one of my teenage days worrying about my weight, and sending me to the doctor, and talking to me about it, and commenting on what I ate. But I was built the exact same as she was!

All the focus on my weight was incredibly stressful and I felt judged, resentful, and never good enough. It's amazing I didn't end up with an eating disorder, given the extreme focus on my body size.

OP, my advice is to keep your eyes open to her behaviour, but stop it with the fixation on her body shape. Kids that age are self-conscious enough about how they look, and the world at large doesn't help. Worry about her eating and if it's disordered, not on how she looks.
 
Old Today, 09:40 AM
Status: "Welcome Governor Polis!" (set 3 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
85,700 posts, read 100,126,654 times
Reputation: 32149
Quote:
Originally Posted by SimplySagacious View Post
It's not concerning if she replaced junk food with healthier options, and that is what it sounds like. Healthier options account for lower calorie intake. She might need more calories during this growth spurt which the OP is trying to address with Ensure.






She sounds like a great kid.
The girl is underweight and possibly losing, so yes, it is concerning. Two people have spoken to the mom about the girl's weight. Mom herself says she's very skinny, but mom is trying to rationalize by saying "she's just a pound under" the minimum healthy weight, etc. There was a possibly precipitating event, when she was changed from a flyer to a catcher in cheer because she's getting bigger.

Most eating disorders specialists hate the term "junk food". People with eating disorders tend to put food into "good food/bad food" categories. Plus, we don't really know what this girl means by "junk food". "Junk" spans the spectrum, from chips and other "nutritionally challenged" food as my husband calls it, to healthy in moderation foods like peanut butter, cheese and other higher calorie food.

The OP is going to go down a rabbit hole trying to handle this herself. with Ensure or whatever. The kid needs to be seen. The problem with waiting until her birthday is that 1) it may not be when she's due for her annual, and insurance will generally only pay for one a year; 2) even if it is time, that's two months down the road, two months longer to get these negative eating habits ingrained, and if mom brings it up then, doc may say a few words and then say, "make an appointment for an eating disorder visit", just prolonging the process.

Here's what the CDC calculator says:
"Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 14.6, placing the BMI-for-age at the 2nd percentile for girls aged 12 years 10 months. This child is underweight and should be seen by a healthcare provider for further assessment to determine possible causes of underweight."
https://www.cdc.gov/healthyweight/bm...ches=60&twp=75

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jo48 View Post
Please be very careful with this. My daughter played sports; Travel and School Soccer, School Field Hockey, Travel and School Softball, and later JV Boys Ice Hockey. Back then she was around 105 lbs and 5'4.

She ate a LOT (dinner leftovers in school). Her Teachers could not believe how she could be so skinny and eat as much as she did. They started following her into the Restroom to see if she was vomiting up her food. Daughter would coming home CRYING. Tell them to leave me alone.

I got a note from the school to discuss her "problem". So I went there in my size 0 jeans, size 5 shoes, and even brought the family photo album with me showing my 5'8, 135 Dad, and 4'10, 85 lb Grandma. That wasn't necessary. As soon as the Teacher saw me, she said, "Oh, your daughter looks just like you". End of discussion and they left her alone after this.

I do not know about gymnastics, but all these other sports required physicals in order to play. Doctors never said anything about her weight. They all signed the form for her to play. Daughter was also a very skinny baby. My in-laws always complained about that all the time. When I told her Pediatrician what they said, he told me to look in the mirror at MYSELF. He said she was healthy, and as strong as an ox.

Oh, I know about about being skinny. When I was a kid, doctor gave me some kind of pill to increase my appetite to put on weight because I was considered underweight by the charts. It made me vomit and I lost weight. Dad was furious over this. Leave her alone, he told the doctor.

OP, as long as her doctor says she is healthy, stop worrying. My daughter is now in her 30's, mother of 2 boys, and is a size 1 or 3. She never put on the pounds. BTW, she still plays ice hockey pick up games, with MEN. I am now 70 and I can still fit in my wedding dress from 44 years ago. I'm 5"1, and just under 100 lbs. Most I have ever weighted in my life was 129 pounds when I was 9 months pregnant.

Edit: Nix the Ensure. Just eat healthy foods.
Allow me to point out your daughter was much heavier for her height than this child. Here's what the CDC calculator (above) says about a 14 year old who is 5"4 and 105#: "Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 18, placing the BMI-for-age at the 31th percentile for girls aged 14 years. This child has healthy weight." Not an equivalent situation.
 
Old Today, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Central IL
14,016 posts, read 7,591,185 times
Reputation: 32676
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katarina Witt View Post
The girl is underweight and possibly losing, so yes, it is concerning. Two people have spoken to the mom about the girl's weight. Mom herself says she's very skinny, but mom is trying to rationalize by saying "she's just a pound under" the minimum healthy weight, etc. There was a possibly precipitating event, when she was changed from a flyer to a catcher in cheer because she's getting bigger.

Most eating disorders specialists hate the term "junk food". People with eating disorders tend to put food into "good food/bad food" categories. Plus, we don't really know what this girl means by "junk food". "Junk" spans the spectrum, from chips and other "nutritionally challenged" food as my husband calls it, to healthy in moderation foods like peanut butter, cheese and other higher calorie food.

The OP is going to go down a rabbit hole trying to handle this herself. with Ensure or whatever. The kid needs to be seen. The problem with waiting until her birthday is that 1) it may not be when she's due for her annual, and insurance will generally only pay for one a year; 2) even if it is time, that's two months down the road, two months longer to get these negative eating habits ingrained, and if mom brings it up then, doc may say a few words and then say, "make an appointment for an eating disorder visit", just prolonging the process.

Here's what the CDC calculator says:
"Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 14.6, placing the BMI-for-age at the 2nd percentile for girls aged 12 years 10 months. This child is underweight and should be seen by a healthcare provider for further assessment to determine possible causes of underweight."
https://www.cdc.gov/healthyweight/bm...ches=60&twp=75



Allow me to point out your daughter was much heavier for her height than this child. Here's what the CDC calculator (above) says about a 14 year old who is 5"4 and 105#: "Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 18, placing the BMI-for-age at the 31th percentile for girls aged 14 years. This child has healthy weight." Not an equivalent situation.
Several of us have pointed out that the OP's logic is not really sound on this issue and also pulled out various BMI calculators that are in agreement - OP just doesn't want to hear it.
 
Old Today, 10:18 AM
 
255 posts, read 378,042 times
Reputation: 247
Yes, Katarina!!! OP, we have both seen the negative consequences of eating disorders. Please listen to us, and err on the side of caution by consulting a doctor sooner rather than later. You can even call ahead of time to the dr and express your concerns so that you don’t have to explain all in front of your daughter. (Or write an email or drop off a letter ahead of the appt)

Take her now. Best case scenario, there is no problem and they know your concerns and can keep tabs on her weight. Worst case, you are starting the treatment on a very difficult problem.

OP, your comments about her change in diet and her worries about being too big are what concern me, along with her weight. This is not a problem that is going to manifest itself clearly or quickly if she has it. She will want to hide her efforts to lose weight.
 
Old Today, 10:32 AM
 
5,776 posts, read 3,310,078 times
Reputation: 6778
Katrina, you quoted her being in the 30th percentile for weight, but you cannot quote this without quoting her percentile for HEIGHT as well.

My 5 year old grandson is in the 25th percentile for weight for his AGE. Grossly underweight? No, because his HEIGHT in also in the same range percentile. He is very SHORT for his age. In fact his 3 year old brother can wear his clothes because his height, and weight, percentiles are above average. There is only a couple of pounds difference between the two of them. How can a 5 year old weight only 3 pounds pounds more than a 3 year?????

To put this in perspective, I am a size 0 and weigh more or less 100 lbs, but I am barely over 5 feet. Want to compare my weight to a 5'10 super model weighing the same 100 lbs., and also a size 0?

You have to factor in height with weight. What is this girl's 5' height percentile? Is that in the 50% percentile range for her age? I know when I worked in public schools the majority of 12 year old girls towered over me. Has the OP's daughter gone through puberty yet? You need to factor that in as well, for both height and weight.
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