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Old 04-03-2011, 03:53 PM
 
Location: Milton Ontario
30 posts, read 79,789 times
Reputation: 14

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Thanks for the encouragement, Woldflower!
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Old 04-03-2011, 04:07 PM
 
Location: Milton Ontario
30 posts, read 79,789 times
Reputation: 14
Thanks for the encouragement, Wild Flower!
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Old 04-05-2011, 05:24 AM
 
2 posts, read 3,422 times
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no stairs for hubby to navigate and i have cleared a place for him problem is that the spaces for me to sleep are quickly becoming non existent. then when his daughter comes over to help and to relieve just a bit of my stress she parks behind my vehicle so i can't go anywhere. then she goes and runs little errands for my husband and will not let me. she even goes and visits her friends, since she is in the area, and leaves her son with me. then of all things she has taken it upon herself to open our mail, the mail that i just brought in like i am incapable of taking care of this.

if i say anything to my hubby about all the things that he has left for me to take care of, yardwork, repairs to the appliances and home, he lays there and says that i am stressing him out. i am going out of my mind. his family and children are implying that i am unable to care for him out of my selfishness. they are implying that i am a bad wife because i refused to help him clean out the place, i was away from the home a minimum of 60 hrs a week for my job and he worked 5 minutes from the house and worked a normal 40 hr wk. i am the bad person in this marriage according to these people and it is taking its toll on me.
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Old 04-05-2011, 08:01 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,311 posts, read 21,397,612 times
Reputation: 26965
Quote:
Originally Posted by kuzzyk View Post
no stairs for hubby to navigate and i have cleared a place for him problem is that the spaces for me to sleep are quickly becoming non existent. then when his daughter comes over to help and to relieve just a bit of my stress she parks behind my vehicle so i can't go anywhere. then she goes and runs little errands for my husband and will not let me. she even goes and visits her friends, since she is in the area, and leaves her son with me. then of all things she has taken it upon herself to open our mail, the mail that i just brought in like i am incapable of taking care of this.

if i say anything to my hubby about all the things that he has left for me to take care of, yardwork, repairs to the appliances and home, he lays there and says that i am stressing him out. i am going out of my mind. his family and children are implying that i am unable to care for him out of my selfishness. they are implying that i am a bad wife because i refused to help him clean out the place, i was away from the home a minimum of 60 hrs a week for my job and he worked 5 minutes from the house and worked a normal 40 hr wk. i am the bad person in this marriage according to these people and it is taking its toll on me.
First, hire someone to mow your yard. You have enough to do and hubby isn't going to feel up to it for a while. Unless you've got a giant yard, it's not going to cost a fortune. Get estimates for the home repair...better to pay someone to do it if you can afford it than to be mad that hubby can't do it. Besides, if he procrastinates the way my husband does, waiting for him to do it could take years even if his leg wasn't broken. And he can't do it right now, so don't mention it to him...when my leg was broken, I couldn't do the laundry or give my kids a bath and my husband used to complain all the time about it, but what could I do?

Second, don't leave the mail where your hubby's daughter can access it. It's not her business.

Third, when she parks behind you and you need to go somewhere, ask her to move her car, or ask her to give you her keys so you can move it. Be persistent. This is your house and your driveway.

Fourth, when she leaves the baby with you, tell her you've got an appointment in an hour(real or fictional appointment), or an errand to run when she comes back. Basically, set a time limit on the free babysitting. An inconvenient time limit...if it takes fifteen minutes to get to her friend's house, an hour isn't enough time for a visit. Once she's ten minutes late, call her cell phone and tell her you've got to go and you hope she's on her way back. If she says she'll be home in ten minutes, call again in ten minutes, and so on...

It doesn't sound like you're incapable of caring for him or a bad wife. It sounds like you're too nice. You let him fill up your house with stuff and now you're letting his kids push you around. Personally, I would take advantage of his down time by clearing out as much of the junk as possible...rent a dumpster if you have to, and just start clearing it out. Anything that's usable by someone else, put on your front lawn and then post a free ad on Craigslist and someone will come haul it away pretty quick. Or if you'd rather, donate the usable things to a charity that will come out and pick them up. When his kids tell you anything, tell them you were too busy working long hours so that their dad could buy all his crap to fill up the house. Ask if they're offering to help, and if they're not, tell them to butt out. Be rude if you need to...you'll get the space you need and you can always apologize later and tell them it was the stress of the situation getting to you , once your husband is recovered and life is back to normal.
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Old 04-07-2011, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Florida
19 posts, read 49,433 times
Reputation: 15
Default Weight Bearing

Mingybear, thanks for asking. I started last Friday by sitting on a chair with a weight scale on the floor in front of me. I leaned forward on the scale, slowly working up to 1/4 of my weight. That gave me some confidence. The next day, a friend who is a physical therapist came by. She coached me as I walked across the floor several times on a walker, trying to increase the weight on my leg as I went. I later switched to crutches. It was such a relief just to be able to put my foot on the ground. I used one crutch, then a cane, and then took a few steps on my own yesterday but, boy, I paid for it later. My leg really hurt. It stills hurts. You said you didn't have much pain - you lucked out. I'm working on it, but it seems like it's going to take awhile. How long did it take before you felt that you were walking more or less like you had before the accident? Thanks.
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Old 04-07-2011, 07:13 PM
 
Location: Milton Ontario
30 posts, read 79,789 times
Reputation: 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Crutches/Will Travel View Post
Mingybear, thanks for asking. I started last Friday by sitting on a chair with a weight scale on the floor in front of me. I leaned forward on the scale, slowly working up to 1/4 of my weight. That gave me some confidence. The next day, a friend who is a physical therapist came by. She coached me as I walked across the floor several times on a walker, trying to increase the weight on my leg as I went. I later switched to crutches. It was such a relief just to be able to put my foot on the ground. I used one crutch, then a cane, and then took a few steps on my own yesterday but, boy, I paid for it later. My leg really hurt. It stills hurts. You said you didn't have much pain - you lucked out. I'm working on it, but it seems like it's going to take awhile. How long did it take before you felt that you were walking more or less like you had before the accident? Thanks.
I am not there yet, but it has only been about 3 weeks since I have been 'weight bearing' - and you are moving faster than I was.

I did this:
1) I 'walked' with two crutches for a few days - maybe a week. This means at a maximum about a third my weight was on my broken leg.
2) I switched to one crutch for a few days. I didn't know it at the time but I was using the crutch on the wrong side - its supposed to go on your good side. This meant half my weight would be on my bad leg.
3) I switched to a cane for about a week. This means all my weight on the bad leg.
4) I stopped using the stirrup and walked free.

Now if any of these don't jive with my prior comments it just because I forgot.

I bought a pedometer and started recording how many steps I took. I try do more every day. I can do about 8,000.

When I meant no/little pain I was referring to the break itself. My ankle is swollen, stiff, and sore. After I did 8,000 steps, my whole leg was sore, but not the break.

I didn't mean to imply there was no discomfort: there is, but my break has no pain. You have to keep at it - don't over do it, but keep pushing.

I can almost see a daily improvement. Now I still have a stiff ankle and a limp. But its much less of a limp than I had Monday. I am not walking like before the break. Not yet.

Its going to be three months next week I broke my leg. I still have a small scab on the surgical scar. I can walk for a few kilometers, but I can't run, I still have trouble going down steps, and I can't balance on my bad leg.

Yet.
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Old 04-08-2011, 08:53 PM
 
Location: Florida
19 posts, read 49,433 times
Reputation: 15
Your program sounds like a good one. I think I'll take a page from your book. It also sounds like you've been able to work through the pain. Like you, I haven't really had much pain during weight bearing from my leg. Instead, it's my foot and ankle that are giving me fits, though my foot has definitely improved. My ankle has improved too, but it is still swollen, stiff, weak, and sore. During my initial recovery, I was very focused on going weight bearing. Now that I'm here, I realize there's still a long way to go. Not to sound like a 80s time capsule, but it's a bummer.

I'm still in a walking boot. When you referred to a "stirrup," did you mean a walking boot? My doctor said I should be walking by the end of this week and off the boot by the end of next week. I don't know exactly what he meant by walking (cane, etc.). I'm working toward those goals, but they seem optimistic. I'd love to ditch the boot. It's a monster and has been tough on my knee.

I just lost the last of the scabs on the incision. A nurse who is a wound care specialist told me to soak the incision in warm water to help with the scabbing. I've also started putting Mederma on the scar, which was recommended to me by a physical therapist.

Thanks very much for your encouragement.
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Old 04-09-2011, 09:43 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
11,311 posts, read 21,397,612 times
Reputation: 26965
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Crutches/Will Travel View Post
I just lost the last of the scabs on the incision. A nurse who is a wound care specialist told me to soak the incision in warm water to help with the scabbing. I've also started putting Mederma on the scar, which was recommended to me by a physical therapist.
I used Mederma for a while, then got too busy to remember to use it. My doctor said it was rubbing the scar a few times a day that really helps, more than the actual ingredients of Mederma.

It's been two years since my surgery and my scar is a thin pink line. I had a deep groove under it that has slowly filled in over the last two years.
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Old 04-09-2011, 11:57 AM
 
Location: Milton Ontario
30 posts, read 79,789 times
Reputation: 14
2Crutches

A stirrup is basically two fitted pieces of plastic with a strap under your heel and two velcro straps holding the plastic tight against your leg. Think of a stiff boot ankle but no boot. I actually thought it was holding my bone together like a cast but apparently its just designed to help support a very weak ankle.

The way I look at it, my foot hadn't had any weight put on it for something like 7 weeks, so naturally my heel and foot got lazy. Imagine if you have to walk on your hands all day! My ankle, which is used to wiggling around all the time as I walk, got used to no moving around at all. So, the muscles got weak and things got gummed up - just like a hinge which hasn't been moved for years. And all the cutting, etc., they did to attach the plates and drill the bones probably meant a fair bit of nerve damage, weaker tissue (as it heals) and probably just stuff gummed up.

I figure I got to work it.

Did your physio friend give you exercises to do? I was given a bunch of them at first:
1) Rotate your foot (draw a 0 with your big toe) one way 5 times then the other.
2) Point your foot out, then back 5 times
3) Twist your foot in, then out 5 times
4) Put a strap around the ball of your foot and pull on it and hold for 20 seconds.

These made a big difference for me.

By the way - people react to pain differently. I am no hero, but maybe I have pain but just think of it as discomfort. You have to get through it. Those exercises, and short distance walking may hurt a lot the first few times. You have to say I'm going to get through this rather than stop once it hurts.

You can actually tell things are getting better.
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Old 04-10-2011, 11:24 PM
 
Location: Tampa Bay, FL
4 posts, read 7,862 times
Reputation: 13
Well i can join this club. Dumped my motorcycle and ended up shattering my tibia right at the knee. This happened on 3/04/11, had surgery on 3/05. Its been a little longer then a month now, still not allowed to put any weight on it. I have a appointment with my surgeon tomorrow morning for another set of xrays to see how everything is going.

This is a post-op xray, I have a total of 9 pieces of metal holding everything together.Breaking you leg sucks, plain and simple. I was in the hospital for a total of 13 days, I was released and after 2 days had to go back because a blood clot formed in my Calf muscle. That honestly hurt worse then the break. I'm just absolutely sick of being a cripple, and im staring at another 5 months, if everything goes good. I am 28 years old and for ****s sake I am putting together a lego pirate ship I got off amazon to pass the time.......
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