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OK I'm bored, and never really felt I went far enough in the details for a suitable plan for American World Conquest, as my earlier posts on this matter were timid and lacking detail about American tourism and the important role it should play in the new world economy.
With the dollar getting stronger every year, as we acquire a larger and larger share of the worlds wealth, and funnel it to our employers, the defense contractors......whom pay us handsomely..... we enjoy our international travels. Americans now average 4 months of vacation time each year, and they love to travel more than ever before. Nearly every country now depends on American tourism to supply at least 25 to 80% of their gross GDP. Before this can happen, the American International Travel Code has to be adopted by every country that wants lucrative American tourism. It paves the way for the safe travel of Americans on foreign soil, and protects our rights abroad. The highlights of the American International Travel Code are as follows.
1) Americans will have the right to bear arms in any country that receives American tourists, unless the CIA has revoked their international firearms pass. Automatic weapons are allowed to be carried by Americans, but only outside the borders of the United States. All rights afforded to Americans at home will be extended to them overseas.
2) A summary trial and execution may result for any foreign citizen that terrorizes, murders, kidnaps, rapes, or intentionaly harms an American tourist, including the theft of wallet or any article greater in value than US $50. This applies to all offenders above the age of 5.
3) A prison sentence of no less than 20 years shall apply to anyone that does any unintentional physical harm to an American, such as any accidental injury, serving toxic/spoiled food/drug or drink to American, giving bad directions that cause injury, ect. The sentence for this offense and all listed below can be commuted by the American victim at his or her discretion.
4) A prison sentence of no less than 10 years for any hotel owner that misrepresents the condition of their hotel to American travel agents or advertising that targets Americans. This includes representation of rooms as non smoking when they are smoking, pools that have not been open and clean for more than 24 hours, ect.
5) A sentence of no less than 5 years for airport/hotel baggage handler that damage luggage or break the contents thereof, including taxi drivers, and any taxi driver that takes a route longer than nessessary to transport an American to his destination, for purpose of financial gain.
6) A sentence of no less than 3 years for anyone arrested for crowding an American in a disorderly mob style fashion. You must line up SINGLE FILE to speak and transact any business with an American touring your country.
7) A sentence of no less than 2 years for the intentional touch an American's hair, person, or articles without permission from said person.
8) A sentence of no less than one year for the accidental touching of an American, and for grocers in tourist areas that do not carry ketchup, peanut butter, Keebler Club Crackers, pork products, beer and liquor, at least one product that contains high fructose corn syrup other than Pepsi, and Diet Pepsi is also required, and cows milk.
Other mandatory requirements for host countries, in the display of road signs. All must have English and native language print, and the display of miles and kilometers. Americans cannot be fined more than $100 for all traffic violations received during visit. No American can be arrested for minor offenses without direct permission from the Office of Foreign Administration and Relations Director, Dick Cheney.
Last edited by mofford; 01-06-2013 at 08:22 PM..
Reason: Not kicking enough butt
Good program, mofford, a restoration of classic Roman thinking regarding what it means to be a citizen of Big Bullyland. How quickly do you think it can be implemented?
One suggested modification...
Quote:
the American International Travel Code has to be adopted by every country that wants lucrative American tourism
....this leaves a nose thumbing option for any nation whose pride motivates them to do without American tourism dollars. Why should the globally dominant power accept such insults from these sparrow fart nations? I think when you next convene your cabal, some thought should be given to the ways and means of compelling all nations to embrace the code.
Good program, mofford, a restoration of classic Roman thinking regarding what it means to be a citizen of Big Bullyland. How quickly do you think it can be implemented?
One suggested modification...
....this leaves a nose thumbing option for any nation whose pride motivates them to do without American tourism dollars. Why should the globally dominant power accept such insults from these sparrow fart nations? I think when you next convene your cabal, some thought should be given to the ways and means of compelling all nations to embrace the code.
Well, OK, perhaps I was going a bit far letting the tourists carry automatic weapons if the host country has adopted the code, but you can't coddle the world in a plan of global conquest. Although I picked Cheney for Foreign Administer, other candidates such as Lee Ermey or Mel Gibson might be OK, I would prefer Edward Teller if he were still alive, but no nukes allowed by the OP.......and this whole world conquest thing can't happen if everyone has nukes.
Not sure if you read my earlier posts, but I laid the basic framework on how it could be done. Without nukes, what do we have to work with ? We have a navy that can prevent rivals from using troop transports, and the best air force in the world. The problem is lack of troops, too few in number to invade China, India or Russia, best to ignore Asian targets until we gain strength, and secure the resourses we need to engage Asia. That leaves many other targets in the world that are quite vulnerable to American occupation, resourses that could be captured to finance the large army we need, via the new American Foreign Legion (god I hate borrowing world conquest ideas from France).
Canada, Venezuela, Nigeria, South Africa, parts of North Africa, Central and South America, these countries are vulnerable. What about the Middle East ? Israel would probably turn on us and become a dangerous rival, maybe not, they might prove to be very devasting to US imperial ambitions in that region. Thats when we bring in Mel Gibson.
Help me out here Grandstander, come on in for the big win !
Last edited by mofford; 01-07-2013 at 10:43 PM..
Reason: I'm an American
. Perhaps, help me out here Grandstander, come on in for the big win !
Of course, I'm practicing my "BWA HA HA HA HA" even as I type.
I'll come in, make myself into an invaluable operative, keep getting more and more responsibility assigned to me until I have clandestinely secured the alliances of your closest associates and control of the bureaucracy. Then I will quietly shove you aside, arranging for a bogus promotion for you to some ineffectual honorary office, and after a decent interval has passed, have you assassinated to eliminate any future worries.
I'll come in, make myself into an invaluable operative, keep getting more and more responsibility assigned to me until I have clandestinely secured the alliances of your closest associates and control of the bureaucracy. Then I will quietly shove you aside, arranging for a bogus promotion for you to some ineffectual honorary office, and after a decent interval has passed, have you assassinated to eliminate any future worries.
Sound good? When do I start?
People like you really scare me sometimes.
I'm sure you know why I did not submit a comprehensive plan with all the details on which county first, troop numbers, probable reactions by other military powers that oppose us and how to counteract them.........because I, like you and many other posters in history forum......some of which might be so very good at planning a world conquest strategy for the US that it would be like treason to post it here and tip off the world. I'm sure you're saving your plan just like everyone else, to submit to your favorite authority for review. so they can pick the best one. You just want the reward money for the best plan and want to grab all the glory when we take Moscow. You don't fool anybody.
factoryrat, you are right, you're supposta take names first and then kick butt from the list of names, but as Americans, we don't necessarily have to do it that way.
Last edited by mofford; 01-09-2013 at 10:43 PM..
Reason: I crash just like the website
8) A sentence of no less than one year for the accidental touching of an American, and for grocers in tourist areas that do not carry ketchup, peanut butter, Keebler Club Crackers, pork products, beer and liquor, at least one product that contains high fructose corn syrup other than Pepsi, and Diet Pepsi is also required, and cows milk.
Yes, and I was going to add to #8.....one year for stealing an American's food, or any item under $50 with an exclusion clause for pen and lighter. For pens and lighters the sentence will be reduced to no less than 4 months, but NO loopholes for expensive lighters or a Sharpie pen, it has to be a Bic or less, otherwise you still get one year. This applies to everyone older than the age of 5, if a baby steals something the parents could still have to do community service.
Last edited by mofford; 01-10-2013 at 06:07 PM..
Reason: distracted by labradoodle lion.
I wanted to add other important food items to #8, such as Jiffy corn bread mix and Rice Krispy Treats, but I dont want to sound like the type of person that goes around imposing their will on others that do not wish it. Americans need to VOTE on which items we want foreign grocers to carry in their stores.
I think if the entirety of the other developed countries on our planet were to attack us simulaneously that we could still do enough damage to them in retaliatory strikes so as to "take the want-to" out of them and force them to cease and desist.
Our mainland would suffer much damage, millions would die in some of our larger cities, but our awesome first-line of defense, our Naval ballistic submarine force, would unleash a fury of firepower unimaginable to most people.
DO you know that merely one missile boat (a "boomer") has more destructive weaponry on it, in the form of ICBMs, than has been unleashed in ALL the wars in the history of the Word?
Each of these subs has a couple dozen ICBMs, with each one of those missiles having enough multiple warheads to take-out about 16 cities. DO the math.
This country is still far and wide the strongest and mightiest on the planet, don't let the naysayers fool you. No one can touch us on a 1 on 1 basis; China's abusrdly large population is meaningless; on of our subs would render that country back to the stone age in a matter of hours.
In other words, we pretty much ROCK!!
Peace (LOL)
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