Craziest thing I've seen off roading thread. (hunting, shooting, walking)

[1AngryTaxPayer]

So I'm hunting the back woods yesterday and see some guy waving his arms. I back up the road and it looks like some hunters are stuck on a nasty jeep trail. I get out and see a guy running up the trail. Mind you we are 10 miles from any pavement. No cell range and even my CB couldn't raise anyone in this huge Canyon.

This is where it gets interesting. The guy is wearing a Metallica shirt and smells like a brew house. What I decipher is that they tried a lil off roading with a 4 door Saturn and found out they don't work well. He said they've been there since the night before

Well, down I go after locking in the hubs on my Super Duty. Their car is high centered BAD. I don't know how much booze they had with them but they were both faded pretty good for NOON. I get positioned and put out the tow line and the lesser of the two drunks acts like he has done it before and scrambles underneath and ties it off. I asked him if he got it on the axle and he says yes. I also asked them if they REALLY want this to happen and the dude says he hates the car anyway. Well..... ok then here we go.

Now the show Guy starts the engine and is revving it up while I ease into low and slow forward. I hear tweedle-drunk yell to tweedle-drunker to see if he can rock it? WHOA I yell stop with the nonsense lets just get you off the dirt mound. I start pulling and get a tight rope as we start moving. Wouldn't you know it tweedle-drunk is yelling for his bushy eyed buddy to PUNCH IT. Well ....... he punched it all right.... in DRIVE. I'm looking in my mirror and I see what looks like the back end of the car shoot straight at me in the mirror like that T Rex in Jurassic park So I punch it too . I get out and what do I find? Tweedle-drunk had attached the hook to one of the rear springs . When the spring decided to part company it took out the back rear plastic panel with it. Now we sit with a naked rear ended Saturn. I look up on the road and like an omen is two Sherriff trucks. Talk about timing . One guy was laughing, the other guy just stared at us. They even had a 4x4 tow truck with them.

It turns out someone had seen them earlier and drove back into town to call the Sherriff. When I got a chance to talk to one of them he said they knew who they were and did that stupid kind of **** all the time. They wanted someone to pull them out cause they just got 502'd the day before and didn't want the law involved.

So today I get to buff out scratches. I can't believe they got that car down that jeep trail as far as they did. Ok, who can top that one?

[drjones96]

NICE

I'll play....except I'll play the part of the idiots that got stuck.

When I was 15 yrs old me and a couple of friends of mine were hanging out at their house. We were there alone, unsupervised...and bored. My bud has a '68 Camaro in the garage that he was itching to drive....although none of us had a license yet. Well it started to snow. People were getting off the roads and nobody was out. For some reason they thought it was a grand idea to take it out for a spin in the snow because we wouldn't be as likely to get caught driving the back roads. OK...so we did....started to snow pretty good....and kept getting deeper and fluffier as the time passed.

Well...somehow when we were taking a short cut we ended up getting off the main road and onto a field road. It was all under the snow so we couldn't tell. Well.....it got a little dicey to say the least. The field road ran next to a 20 ft drainage ditch and we were riding the edge of that mofo. Luckily we didn't go in but at the end of the road it turned and ran alongside a gravel road. So we were extremely relieved to make it to an actual road. So we went to pull onto it. Well...the fluffy snow hid that little drainage ditch nicely....so we got stuck.

Luckily we were close to a house and we ran over there to see if they could get us out. The lady called her son who had a tractor and he hooked on and got us out. We were so nervous because we thought they would call the law. They asked what my name was and I slipped them a fake name. None of us looked old enough to drive. We hadn't even developed facial hair hardly.

The guy was like,"WTF were you guys doing out here? Just f-ing around in the snow?"

"uh...yeah something like that"

"Well I'll tell ya what. I'm gonna need some good field hands come this spring. You boys up to it?"

"Uh....uh....."

"HE HE HE....aw I'm just f-ing with you boys. I'll get you out of here"

Fortunately it didn't get f-ed up getting it out though. The guy probaby knew how to hook it on right.

[Chango]

THIS THREAD IS WORTHLESS WITHOUT PICS!

[swagger]

I've seen some stupid crap on the trail, but I don't think that anything I've seen tops the OP.

A close (or distant?) second would have to be when we saw a guy in a stock Pathfinder that got stuck coming up Odessa canyon (near Calico ghost town in the SoCal desert). He'd come up with his two kids and was camping at the ghost town RV park. He'd broken a tie rod (the only two times I've seen a Pathfinder on the trail, they BOTH had broken tie rods - I will NEVER own a Nissan 4x4) and was completely blocking the trail.

This guy was wheeling with his kids ALONE, with no tools, spare parts, extra food or water or anything else that might be useful if you get stuck. He was on a trail that was MUCH too difficult for his rig - we couldn't figure out how he'd managed to get as far as he did.

Luckily for him, there were about 15 vehicles in our group, and we had plenty of tools, and one of our guys had a welder. Unluckily for him, the welder was new and the owner hadn't installed a 2nd battery in his rig yet, so it wasn't getting hot enough to weld the tie rod back together.

To get him out of the way, a couple of our guys went BACK up Odessa the way we came, then back down Doran, and up Odessa until they got to his truck. They pulled him out of the way, and we gave him a ride back to camp.

Now, while all this was happening - from the time we found him until the time we got him back to camp - he was complaining and giving us a sob story about how he had to have his kids back to their mother the next morning, or he'd lose all his visitation rights, and could we drive him into Barstow to get parts that night (like anyplace would've been open), and he actually got indignant when our guys told him no. We'd already tried to fix his rig (that shouldn't have been there to begin with), offered to take him into town the next day and give him a ride back to his truck after he got the part, etc., and this guy still wasn't satisfied...

He was going to spend the night in his truck with his kids. This was in early January in the Mojave desert. We very well might have saved his and his kids lives, and he was too stupid to even realize it.

I have some pics of that run, but none of the idiot in question or his truck. Here's one of some of our rigs, while we were stopped to help this fool. You can see by the shade line that it's late afternoon, and we didn't get out of the canyon until after dark - several hours lost because some moron decided to try and show off for his kids. You can also see that the trail is headed down into a steep canyon. He got stuck in a spot that's barely wide enough for a full size rig, with sheer rock cliffs on either side. Passing him was not even remotely possible.

[Andreams]

How about the stupidest things I've seen offroading?

Out in California, I went to a offroad park called Hollister Hills. I went with a few new friends, some of which had no clue what they were doing. Not that I had a lot of clues, but hey, I just wanted to go for fun. We all wanted to try to go through this mud pit (about 30 yards by 20 yards), and no clue how deep it was.

On the way over, we came across some other guys that wanted to try it. So onward we all went. In our little caravan, it was a '91 Cherokee, '04 Tacoma, '97 Silverado, early nineties Bronco, and a late nineties Wrangler.

First, while driving down the side of the pit, the Cherokee got stuck. The tire slipped into the pit, and there it stayed. Then, the Silverado tried to just bomb through the pit. It got stuck halfway across, grill halfway into the mud with it's back tires just barely touching the surface. Then Bronco made it across only to get stuck after trying to pull out the Cherokee (he had backed into the mud pit by accident). Then, the Tacoma decided to go for it. He made it about 3/4's of the way across, only to stop with his bed in the mud, front tires midyear, and the passanger door almost facing the sky.

Finally, the Wrangler. He thought it would be super cool to fly up a hillclimb right next to the mud pit. Only, after not being able to get up, he thought going through the mudpit would be his best option. Nope. He only made it a few yards before he was sunk up to his doors.

So that's it. 3 vehicles in the pit and two on the outside, all stuck, all at one time. It took another guy about 2 hours and his wench to get us all out. At least it wasn't my vehicle

[ferretkona]

We were up deer hunting, we had two trucks in the group.
We run apon some hick needing help, he wants someone to push him to jump start his jeep.
I go on to complete the beer run. A hour later I return to camp. Ends up this hick had them pushing him 45 minutes before anyone popped his hood. No battery! He thought it would start with one.

[Chango]

Originally Posted by ferretkona

We were up deer hunting, we had two trucks in the group.
We run apon some hick needing help, he wants someone to push him to jump start his jeep.
I go on to complete the beer run. A hour later I return to camp. Ends up this hick had them pushing him 45 minutes before anyone popped his hood. No battery! He thought it would start with one.

That's actually really funny. My hunting buddies would have probably kicked his a$$, for that kind of revelation.

My stupidest stunt ever got my (at the time) brand new FJ cruiser buried up to the windowsills in mud at a hot spring in the middle of Utah's West desert (Fish Springs). It cost 400 bucks to get it out with a winch truck.

Alas, there are no pictures... and I try to keep it that way when my "less than shining" moments come out into the open.

But it's pretty country out there; here's a pic of fish springs...

[jdavid93225]

I remember a time about 28 years ago when I went shooting with my stepfather in an area north of Los Angeles. After we did some shooting, he decided that we should leave the shooting area by taking the fire road over to the next canyon, since it was a nice day and the weather was pleasant. About half way through the trip, we came across a guy on the ridge above the road yelling at us. He came running down the ridge to where we were now stopped. When he got to our truck, he said that he and some friends needed help getting their truck unstuck, and it was just a little further up the road. We agreed to help, and gave him a ride back to where the truck was stuck.

When we arrived there, we found, not one, but two trucks, one of which had rolled onto it's side, that were stuck, and they were stuck together. It turns out that the guys were racing along the fire road, and came to a berm alongside the road. They decided to ride up the berm, and the first truck rolled onto it's side there. The second truck tried to stop, but was unable to before he climbed the berm. When he came down, the rear tube bumper of the first truck ended up getting caught inside the front fender of the second truck. I can picture this scene in my mind to this day, but still have a hard time describing it.

Anyway, there was no way we were going to be able to separate the trucks since the second one was hooked on the first one in a way where it would have to be lifted off. We gave a couple of the guys a ride to a nearby ranger station, and they were able to summon help from there.

The funny thing is, that's not the end of the story. A few years later, I started a new job, and one of the guys (named George) where I worked had a Toyota 4x4 much like the one I had seen that day (the truck that rolled onto it's side). Well, it seems this was George's second Toyota 4x4, since he had rolled his first one twice. Well, I described the incidents of that day, and came to find out that it was him that we rescued that day! That was the first of the two rollovers in that truck.

[harry chickpea]

"It took another guy about 2 hours and his wench to get us all out."

I would LOVE to see a photo of his wench. She must be built like a brick ****house.

[Magnum Mike]

We weren't really off-roading in a 4x4, but my girlfriend back then and I were just walking on a trail in the woods near Pinetop, Arizona (elevation 8,000 feet) just checking the fall colors, and we heard noise behind a short berm. I walked quietely over the berm to see what it was, we thought it was a deer or elk, but it turned out to be a guy and a woman having an intimate romantic interlude together on a pile of leaves... - I went back to the main trail and I told my girlfriend to just keep walking.. I guess somebody should have told them to get a room!