Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Serenity, space, cost, chance to grow at least some of your own food and know where it came from, the ability to challenge yourself and (hopefully) rise to the challenge.
If you don't want to live in a rural area, that's your choice and I can respect that.
As for water, well water is generally pretty good. Unfortunately, in some parts of the country, you may have some issues during the summer months.
As for internet, it's reasonably available in many rural areas.
People in rural areas are usually pretty nice to each other, and your city friends generally would love a long peaceful weekend in the country.
I had a friend who lived so far out in the country he didn't even have any neighbors that you could see from his house. AND country roads are just rocky paths which can pop tires. Why even build houses somewhere like that? If a company builds a house why don't the roads get paved? That'd be a little better.
You don't have as good Internet or cell phone service. You have to rely on electricity for your water (in assuming all rural homes have to rely on wells for water). If you need emergency help it takes longer for them to arrive. You have to have a car because its too far to walk anywhere. You can't walk anywhere. It's lonely because its so wide open and spread out. It seems its mostly older people who like to live in rural areas. Why? Is it because you think think its safer? It has its own dangers just like a city.
Wth? Close knit? Lol my friend. The small town near me is full of many rude and ignorant people. And in my rural neighborhood its mostly just old people. Big cities have more people, and I watched people approach random people walking around in big cities and not everyone responded with a slap in the face or a creeper out reaction. I guess its because they weren't immature high school students.
How many friends does a person need? It depends on how often they're busy or how good of a friend they are. How many true friends does somebody need? Probably not a lot. But on the other hand the more friends you have the less often you might have to be by yourself. I don't know why for sure but I used to made fun of for having no or little friends, so that must mean hanging out by yourself all the time is kind of loser like right? I can tell you this its depressing the Internet doesn't full the void either. Even talking to friends I made online who live far away doesn't fill the void, because its not face to face. Does this mean I have some kind of disorder or is it normal to get depressed and lonely?
I'm beginning to see your problem.
With an attitude like you express towards the people who live in the town near you, it's not surprising that you didn't have many friends. But that attitude expressed towards people ANYWHERE is going to guarantee a lack of friends - the problem is not with them.
Hanging out by yourself is not "kind of loser" unless you, yourself, are a loser. And, in fact, you're better company for others if you're able to be good company for yourself and aren't dependent on others to make you interesting.
This all applies rural OR urban, by the way. You can just hide from it better in the middle of a bunch of people.
You don't have as good Internet or cell phone service. You have to rely on electricity for your water (in assuming all rural homes have to rely on wells for water). If you need emergency help it takes longer for them to arrive. You have to have a car because its too far to walk anywhere. You can't walk anywhere. It's lonely because its so wide open and spread out. It seems its mostly older people who like to live in rural areas. Why? Is it because you think think its safer? It has its own dangers just like a city.
I have great internet and cell service along with television.
I don't have to rely on electricity for water because we have a well that will work without electricity.
Our Emergency Services are 5 minutes away.
I can walk the 1 mile into our small town if I want to without any problems.
Most of the people who live in rural areas are agriculture oriented or
just don't like nosy neighbors, they would rather deal with cows.
We have been in our home for 4 years and I still do not have curtains up in the entire house and nobody cares.
You can keep your noisy, stinking, no privacy city and I'll keep the cows.
I had a friend who lived so far out in the country he didn't even have any neighbors that you could see from his house. AND country roads are just rocky paths which can pop tires. Why even build houses somewhere like that? If a company builds a house why don't the roads get paved? That'd be a little better.
Not all country roads are wagon paths without pavement. Where are you getting this idea from?
All of the roads in our area a paved and the county keeps the ditches mowed and the roads cleared during inclement weather.
Why do you care where and how others live? If you don't like it don't live in the country.
I know what Chris is experiencing. I've been there. My guess is that he doesn't share common interest or values with nearby people of his age, and being rural feels like a trap. I certainly experienced that, and there was no internet or computers, tv was minimal, and long distance phone calls were too expensive to even consider.
The lack of being able to socialize is the real issue. The other stuff is just "stuff" to justify.
"How many friends does a person need? It depends on how often they're busy or how good of a friend they are. How many true friends does somebody need? Probably not a lot. But on the other hand the more friends you have the less often you might have to be by yourself. I don't know why for sure but I used to made fun of for having no or little friends, so that must mean hanging out by yourself all the time is kind of loser like right? I can tell you this its depressing the Internet doesn't full the void either. Even talking to friends I made online who live far away doesn't fill the void, because its not face to face. Does this mean I have some kind of disorder or is it normal to get depressed and lonely? "
You might never even know your "true" friends. True friends come out when there is a need, and may move on without your even noticing. Buddies and friends may or may not be true friends. You just need to act like they are and hope that they live up to expectations, but give them some slack to be stupid because we are ALL stupid.
"is it normal to get depressed and lonely?"
Yes... and no. It is part of maturation and clarifying of your own values and value. A certain amount of it is entirely normal, and being in a city won't change that except to mask some of it. If the depression begins to interfere with your life, or you are constantly lonely, you would do well to get help in working on that. It could be from a mentor, a group, a counselor, or just someone you can safely trust. It isn't ABnormal as much as too much of a PITA to put up with without complaint if you can get help.
I used to tune in the radio to stations in Glens Falls, Albany and New York City and wish that I could be there rather than every place within 100 miles rolling up the sidewalks at 5 PM and the biggest event on a Sunday was mowing. Living rural can be a bear, and that bear can be even bigger in the imagination than in real life.
How many friends do you need, minimum? One. Yourself. When you get to be fully actualized, and your values solid and consistent, those who also have solid values kind of automatically become friends.
Living rural - get outside of your own world, see what others around you want and need, and focus some energy there. You might find it helps.
I'm not nor will I ever be a rural person, physically, mentally politically, etc. But food has to come from somewhere, and just think, cities are more dense (Good thing in my opinion) because rural areas are more, well rural.
With an attitude like you express towards the people who live in the town near you, it's not surprising that you didn't have many friends. But that attitude expressed towards people ANYWHERE is going to guarantee a lack of friends - the problem is not with them.
Hanging out by yourself is not "kind of loser" unless you, yourself, are a loser. And, in fact, you're better company for others if you're able to be good company for yourself and aren't dependent on others to make you interesting.
This all applies rural OR urban, by the way. You can just hide from it better in the middle of a bunch of people.
Hey, other people say everybody is rude and ignorant because almost everyone is here, those a-holes GAVE me this attitude, I didn't think that in the past and that didn't make a difference!
Last edited by Chris Griffin; 09-05-2014 at 11:46 PM..
I have 1.8 million acres of Forest and BLM land surrounding me, plus 3 lakes, the Missouri river, a nice small town.. We're not lonely- we can walk and see deer, elk, antelope, grizzly, mountain lions....
It's actually quite nice and the neighbors stay to themselves.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
