Best Idaho town for two gay and proud men (Idaho Falls: buy, living)

[twinprism]

Stingraynm,
Thanks for the nice note. I can definitely see where you are coming from. Pocatello at first glance can appear kind of run down and dirty due to it's industrial/railroad past, but I've seen major improvements in that regard in the past 12 years or so I've lived here. Couple that with the fact that many Pocatello residents have a bit of an inferiority complex and it is easy to dwell on the negatives. Pocatello was often in second place in SE Idaho, but that is changing. Everyone has to have another city (usually smaller) to make fun of, such as "Well, at least we don't live in Blackfoot" j/k Blackfoot residents, I grew up there.. it was just an example.

Despite all that, Pocatello has had a way of growing on me. I didn't love it at first, but the longer I've been here, the more I've enjoyed it. Kind of like finding those hidden gems right under your nose. Fall in the mountains around here is breathtaking Hey, I'm really glad everyone doesn't want to move to Pocatello, many of the things I like about it would be harmed..

[stingraynm]

Originally Posted by twinprism

Hey, I'm really glad everyone doesn't want to move to Pocatello, many of the things I like about it would be harmed..

Yeah, the benefits/bothers of good or bad reputations seem to get discussed a lot by Idahoans on these forums. I, too, have come to accept all the bad stereotypes that are relayed about Idaho in the hope that those stereotypes will not only keep the development/population under control for my eventual return, but also weed out the sort of ignorant, presumptuous riff raff who believe stereotypes in the first place.

The only obnoxious factor that makes me rather defensive about the reputation of Idaho citizenry is the hurdle of surmounting stereotypes after I moved. Top that with the fact that most of my friends still live in Idaho, and it's easy to see certain rumors as downright malicious. Talking bad about an area is a matter of subjective informing under the belief that someone will share certain preferences/aversions. Talking bad about people in general within any region is, by its very nature, unfounded and harmful.

Thanks for understanding that I meant nothing against Pocatello's citizens for holding a preference that I do not. Actually, the last time I went through Pocatello was nearly a decade ago, so I'm sure it has changed substantially.

[norcalmom101]

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[Sage of Sagle]

Originally Posted by redheadedsister

Trust me.....live somewhere around Boise. Meridian, Kuna.....they wouldn't let them have a GLT float in the parade here! No tolerance UNLESS you ARE from California and you relocated....then they will hate you for that alone not to mention being gay.
Idaho is beautiful on the outside....but very ugly underneath.

Care to elaborate a bit? Sort of strong statement, and knowing your full perspective on the issue is more valuable than a mix of rhetoric and superficial opinion...but we'd like to hear what you have to say....

[stingraynm]

Originally Posted by redheadedsister

Trust me.....live somewhere around Boise. Meridian, Kuna.....they wouldn't let them have a GLT float in the parade here! No tolerance UNLESS you ARE from California and you relocated....then they will hate you for that alone not to mention being gay.
Idaho is beautiful on the outside....but very ugly underneath.

I've covered this exhaustively in so many forums, just check out some of my other comments for my opinion about Idaho newcomers who presume that the citizens are exclusionary. Believe me, if you're getting mistreated by the general population, chances are it's something you're instigating. Many newcomers are very welcomed by the natives if they don't take a socially abrasive or condescending attitude.

As for the discrimination you note, that sort of thing is usually a result of the city council, etc. Let me put it this way: Just because you're an American, would you like other nations to automatically presume you, as an individual, share the attitudes/goals of the Bush administration? How would you like to visit another country, and listen to everyone refer to you as an ethnocentric religious fundamentalist from the United States, even when you demonstrate a fluent knowledge of their language, a secular humanist belief system, and appreciation for their customs? It's not fun to go everywhere with presumptions and stereotypes preceding and even interfering with your attempts to meet people, something you should've learned from the newcomer discrimination you describe.

Essentially, that's exactly what broad statements like yours do to the citizens of Idaho. Just because elected officials happen to make prejudiced, knee-jerk decisions does not mean that the populace are a bunch of ignorant bigots. It just means that there was a large faction that those officials could've appealed to on many fronts, and this just turns out to be one of their personal decisions now that they have authority.

Please, if you dislike prejudice and discrimination, don't be a part of its proliferation. You could've said the exact same thing with only references to specific experience(s), and I'd probably agree with you. The generalization about Idahoans being exclusionary and "ugly" is out of line, though. If everyone REALLY is treating you like a nuisance, it's time to stop pointing your finger and look in the mirror.

[boi2socal]

Originally Posted by stingraynm

I can definitely see where you're coming from, in any case, as I've had people around the US actually apologize to me for the fact that I grew up in Boise (even some who've only heard about Idaho in general and never even been to Boise, let alone Idaho). Some of them even stretch their presumptions into prejudice about my identity. I love Boise and Idaho to the extent that I kind of resent all the demeaning and completely untrue reputations I've heard. A lot of people talk way to much while understanding way to little...

...but I suppose that's not exactly breakthrough news there.

I'm doing the same here in California! Although it seems Boise is becoming less abstract to people recently. I guess the secret is out.

[norcalmom101]

I've met several gay people, male and female, in the past two weeks, in various settings, in the IF area. Whether it involved business or recreation, it was a total non-issue.

[stingraynm]

Originally Posted by norcalmom101

I've met several gay people, male and female, in the past two weeks, in various settings, in the IF area. Whether it involved business or recreation, it was a total non-issue.

Really quite true. So long as it isn't "pushed" as an issue on the defensive front, then like anywhere the true faux pas is making an issue of a matter that is so personal as to not affect anything of social consequence. Even those who exercise civil disagreement with that trait, lifestyle, preference, etc. in Idaho can understand that it really is a non-issue that isn't worth the wasted utility of personal objection. Even if that was a problem from someone's perspective, there are "bigger fish to fry".

[norcalmom101]

Originally Posted by stingraynm

Really quite true. So long as it isn't "pushed" as an issue on the defensive front, then like anywhere the true faux pas is making an issue of a matter that is so personal as to not affect anything of social consequence. Even those who exercise civil disagreement with that trait, lifestyle, preference, etc. in Idaho can understand that it really is a non-issue that isn't worth the wasted utility of personal objection. Even if that was a problem from someone's perspective, there are "bigger fish to fry".

Well said

[jimg1126]

Nobody cares about gays except the PROUD part. Nobody likes anyone who is PROUD of their sexuality.

Do I walk around town with my hand up my wife's crotch? No. That's just no acceptable behavior.

Why don't you put a lid on the PROUD part of your gayness and you'll be fine.