Rudeness? (Des Moines, Dubuque: home, college, live)

[TheCaliforniaBear]

I spent one day in Des Moines. Yeah I know it's not a long time. I was just passing through.

One thing that really struck me is that the people seemed to have a very cold, serious, somewhat rude vibe.

Is there any truth to this? Most of the Midwest seems to have this attitude to some level, but in Des Moines it was intense. You try to be friendly to people and they just respond with ice cold vibes. It was just too much.

I was with a friend and he was saying the same thing. He was actually getting angry about it and it made him uncomfortable. I was just laughing about it though because I knew I was getting outta there the next day

What's up with Iowa? Turn that frown upside down

[tiki7]

Its a little hard to give a good, objective opinion on this since I live here. Not that I'm always 'rah rah' about Des Moines but rather, this is my comfort zone. I know people here and therefore feel accepted. I moved here about 20 years ago though, right out of college and do remember it taking a long time to make friends....a little different from what you are asking but my thought is this.....Many people from Des Moines and Iowa in general are descended from Northern European stock...Germany, the Scandinavian countries, etc. People of this heritage tend to be reserved at first but once they feel comfortable with you, you usually cannot find better friends. I travel quite a bit and, looking at it as objectively as I can, don't really think we are "colder" than other Midwestern cities.

[Drover]

Throughout much of the upper Midwest, privacy and "personal space" are highly valued and their first instinct is to mind their own business. For many, "small talk" between strangers is considered almost disingenuous -- they'd rather not pretend to give a crap about each other when they both know they don't. For lack of a better term, it's an introverted and sometimes insular culture. This comes across as "rudeness" for those who come from more open/chatty cultures, but it's the standard rules of interaction for a lot of folks up here.

[Chicago60614]

Des Moines is not rude.

[QuadCityImages]

I think a lot of the "how are people in X state" threads on City-Data are over generalized. I don't think people in different areas of the country are so easily pigeonholed. I've been to 30 states, and I haven't noticed all that much difference from one region to another on how friendly or rude people are. Some people in Chicago or New York have no problem making small talk with a stranger, while some people in "southern hospitality" or "midwest nice" states might flip you off for saying its a nice day outside. There are all kinds of people everywhere.

[Drover]

I thought it was understood that regional cultures were described in general terms and that not everyone in said region behaves according to those terms. Otherwise we'd all have to waste a lot of time qualifying every statement we make about regional habits.

[saucyjack]

is this your home town?

[saucyjack]

hmm

[culater88]

I was in Dubuque IA for a couple of months and I found the folks there real down to earth and friendly.

[Chicago60614]

I think it's funny this person was passing through a town and then labeled the population of the state as cold and rude, haha.