Yup...I am venting here folks, so be prepared for negativity.
In my warped opinion, interviewing for a job is one of the crappiest experiences one has to go through in life. I hate interviewing for jobs, I always have, I always will.
I had an in person interview yesterday for an administration assistant position at a health care distributor. The same company my father retired from back in 1994. So yeah, I kind of know about the company considering I heard about it from my father while I was growing up.
Anyway, I consider this interview my
second interview as I already had one interview over the phone with their recruiter. (from all the job experts out there, I am sure I am WRONG and this in person interview is really my FIRST interview, [sigh]).
I wear my suit. I bring extra copies of my resume and a copy of the job description. The interview was at 2:00 pm. I arrive at 1:50 pm, wait in my car until 1:54 pm and walk in the reception area at 1:55 pm.
I am prompt, dependable and prepared, just like they tell all of us unemployed losers to do when we are interviewing for a job.
I get my little badge and wait ten minutes.
The HR Director (HR Gal) (with the largest nose I have ever seen on a woman in person, I kid you not) and Operations Manager (OM Guy) come out and greet me at 2:10 pm. We go into a really HOT office, I leave my coat on because they didn't ask to take it and there was no where to put it. Plus I figured I wouldn't be there that long as I saw the faces on the two when they greeted me and I can guarantee you they were thinking:
"MY GOD SHE IS FREAKIN' OLD! I CAN'T WORK WITH MY GRANDMA!"
Well, really, I am 45 years old (and I dyed my hair for this interview, oh the shame, what was I thinking?). HR Gal and OM Guy looked to be about 30-35 years old. So I guess I could be their mother, or a much older step sister...
The interview is the same old same old:
...what are your strengths...
...blah, blah, what are your weaknesses...
...WHY DO YOU HAVE GAPS ON YOUR RESUME YOU LOSER...
...you have a lot of computer skills but we don't need someone with THAT much computer skills...
...blah, blah, where do you see yourself in five years, blah, blah...
Interview questions are so damn tiring.
I felt like telling HR Gal and OM Guy as they were droning on, that I could run circles around this job AND probably run circles around THEIR jobs as well. Hey, I may be unemployed but that doesn't mean I have to belittle myself and my skills, I know what I can do, and I usually do it well. But I figured they wouldn't take too kindly to that comment, plus they wouldn't have any clue what I was talking about.
The OM guy asked me how I knew about the company, I mentioned my father retired from the company in 1994. They both squinted their eyes and looked at each other, confused. The OM guy said, "I don't think I was here at that time." The HR gal said "Neither was I."
I wanted to laugh at loud and say "unless the company hired you both at the age of 12, I highly doubt you were working here or any job for that matter in 1994."
But I didn't laugh, as we all know laughing at an interview is a NO, NO. Plus the HR Gal and OM Guy were as dry as my rosacea skin gets in the middle of February. Seriously.
At the end of the interview I asked the HR Gal and OM Guy if they were interviewing internal candidates.
They replied: "Yes we are."
I replied: "I figured you were."
The OM guy said "Rick" the recruiter would call me and let me know my status, and that they had to schedule second interviews next week. I thought to myself: "MORE ROUNDS OF INTERVIEWS! UGH!!!!"
Why can't they just promote Suzy in the warehouse to the position and be done with it? Once he said there were internal candidates I knew it was all over for us external candidates. It was all just a terrible ruse.
Whatever.
Even if they were going to hire an external candidate I knew I had no chance in hell of being hired as HR Gal did not like me. She kept making sneery smiles at me whenever I mentioned my HRIS Administrator experience. I wanted to make a sneery smile back to her, but it would just end up looking like I was having a seizure.
Whatever.
The interview ended after 20 minutes. I let myself out, dropping off my little badge at the reception area.
When I got in my car I breathed a sigh of relief and said to myself "Thank God I am not getting THAT job. I would go crazy trying to find ways to NOT go crazy sitting in a hot stuffy building with boring office drones."
I get home at 3:30 pm. At 5:30 pm I get THE EMAIL.
It said:
------------------------------------
We appreciate your time and effort in pursuing a career with our company. However, the Asst II, Administration-Days-NY position, reference number 12001454, has been filled.
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Wow, the HR gal sure works fast, that is a new one for HR. Amazing how they can fill the position so quickly considering the OM guy told me they had another round of interviews to go through next week.
Maybe Suzy got the job?
CONGRATS SUZY!
YOU GO GIRL!
I guess "Rick the recruiter" was too busy to pick up the phone and call me.
Whatever.
Time to brew some beer and have some fun.
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