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Old 03-11-2013, 05:45 PM
 
Location: Nassau, Long Island, NY
16,408 posts, read 28,896,131 times
Reputation: 7268

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Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
My "opportunity" hit a snag. I have to have a license and extensive experience operating a motor vehicle. Because of that, I won't be able to work for the company. I'll have to wait at least 2 months now. My mother doesn't want to teach me how to drive anymore and says I should just get a professional to teach me.
Did the company actually tell you that or are you assuming that because of what you re-read in the job posting? Sometimes (more often than not) the people who put in the ads are lazy and go overboard with boilerplate language in it and some "requirements" are there but they may not apply to every job. Does the job actually entail you driving around?
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Old 03-11-2013, 06:18 PM
 
Location: Wicker Park, Chicago
4,791 posts, read 13,207,172 times
Reputation: 1944
Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
My "opportunity" hit a snag. I have to have a license and extensive experience operating a motor vehicle. Because of that, I won't be able to work for the company. I'll have to wait at least 2 months now. My mother doesn't want to teach me how to drive anymore and says I should just get a professional to teach me.
That's your big fault. When any company hires an eng grad they expect him / her to know how to drive and have a car. I got a car against my parent's initial wishes but then they submitted to it when I said it would help me in college. In H.S. I had an argument with my Dad and he pointed a gun at me saying, "You get a car.. you get out of this house!"

Being able to drive to work is a necessity for prof work. Learn how to drive and get a good car. Especially learn how to drive the hwy.
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Old 03-11-2013, 07:42 PM
Status: "I hate living in Georgia!!" (set 13 days ago)
 
48,149 posts, read 45,495,400 times
Reputation: 15338
I just got glasses today and I'm going to start driving lessons as soon as possible. I'm doing research on driving schools.
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Old 03-11-2013, 07:57 PM
Status: "I hate living in Georgia!!" (set 13 days ago)
 
48,149 posts, read 45,495,400 times
Reputation: 15338
Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
green_mariner, I'm not sure if I've shared this story with you before but in case I didn't:

I also had a fear of driving, mostly instilled by parents who weren't exactly interested in preparing me for the real world (sounds like you have a similar problem). I got my license at 17, but with significantly less time behind the wheel than I was supposed to because my parents refused to teach me and then they only let me drive a handful of times between when I got my license and when I moved to college. I lived in an urban area for college and tried to set up my life so I wouldn't ever need to drive. After college, I briefly moved back to Georgia, but lived in Decatur where I could walk everywhere versus at home with my parents in Cumming where I couldn't even bike to a job. I eventually found employment at my alma mater and moved back to the Boston suburbs for work.

And then I got cancer and suddenly I couldn't walk 2 miles without thinking about it anymore - much less take public transit with all the germs or run around outside in the snow. After 3 months of begging rides off of people, I eventually accepted that I had to get a car. I leased (stupid decision looking back, but I was bogged down by cancer bills and it was a lower monthly payment for a car that I knew would be safe and not give me many problems) and the day I drove off the lot and drove 30 miles home in Boston sports traffic was the first time I had driven in almost 5 years. It was horrifying. And Boston area drivers are much more aggressive, much more likely to lay on the horn, and dealing with much more difficult roads/conditions than I ever had to deal with in Georgia.

But it's now been 2 years and I'm a M******* along with the best of them! The first few months were scary - I gave myself lots of extra time, didn't try to take backroads (I might have to make a left turn IN TRAFFIC!), and stayed away from rotaries if I could help it. Slowly, I eased myself into the more difficult and scary situations. It gets better. You do what you have to do. Keep in mind that I was learning to drive all while actively going through chemo. If I could do it, you could do it.

The sooner you can get away from your parents, the better. They sound so much like my parents in some ways. Parents should want their kids to be independent, when parents like ours seem to say they want us to be independent with their words but not do so with their actions.
I think you did tell me about this. I don't remember. We were both in similar situations. I'm still in the situation. For me, I learned how to live without driving for a long time. I got by because my whole life centered around my university and there were buses to take me elsewhere. Now that I'm back at my parents house, I'm now forced to get a license.

I have my glasses now, so I can learn.

I think the thing that scares me is that I can lose my attention span easily, and if I do that on the highway, the consequences of that can be deadly. When I'm on a bus, I don't think about that. When I'm walking, I'm at a slower pace, and even on a bicycle, most of the time I knew how to stay away from the cars. In a car, you're with other cars and you have to keep up with the other cars, and think on a dime.

I think about your story is that. You came to a point where you were forced to get a car. For you, it was life or death. I can draw a parallel between your life and my life. The only reason I did many things was out of desperation or deep necessity. I knew my life was hard without a car or a license. However, I never had an economic incentive to get a car or get a license. My thinking was "why get a license if I can't afford a car"?

With learning how to drive, well, I never bothered because I often assumed my parents didn't think I was mature enough to use their car alone. I was described by some people, specifically students, as having a ton of book smarts, but lacking social skills or common sense. Some things I never bothered asking for because of assumptions I made.

At this point, my mother doesn't want to teach me anymore because according to her, I get nervous too easily, and has suggested I get a professional to teach me.
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Old 03-11-2013, 08:06 PM
 
457 posts, read 1,003,076 times
Reputation: 569
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesse69 View Post
That's your big fault. When any company hires an eng grad they expect him / her to know how to drive and have a car. I got a car against my parent's initial wishes but then they submitted to it when I said it would help me in college. In H.S. I had an argument with my Dad and he pointed a gun at me saying, "You get a car.. you get out of this house!"

Being able to drive to work is a necessity for prof work. Learn how to drive and get a good car. Especially learn how to drive the hwy.
What? How about the 8 million people living in New York that don't have cars? Lots of people take public transportation to work. A car can be a liability.
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Old 03-11-2013, 08:08 PM
Status: "I hate living in Georgia!!" (set 13 days ago)
 
48,149 posts, read 45,495,400 times
Reputation: 15338
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesse69 View Post
That's your big fault. When any company hires an eng grad they expect him / her to know how to drive and have a car. I got a car against my parent's initial wishes but then they submitted to it when I said it would help me in college. In H.S. I had an argument with my Dad and he pointed a gun at me saying, "You get a car.. you get out of this house!"

Being able to drive to work is a necessity for prof work. Learn how to drive and get a good car. Especially learn how to drive the hwy.
Whoa, that was extreme. I never had that kind of argument with my parents. I never bothered to get a car when I was a teenager because at 16 or 17, I never had the mentality to think about getting a car. I only thought about "go home and get away from everyone". The irony was I ran track in high school.

As for why I barely learned how to drive, well, it can be found in other posts.
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Old 03-11-2013, 08:10 PM
Status: "I hate living in Georgia!!" (set 13 days ago)
 
48,149 posts, read 45,495,400 times
Reputation: 15338
Quote:
Originally Posted by I_Love_LI_but View Post
Did the company actually tell you that or are you assuming that because of what you re-read in the job posting? Sometimes (more often than not) the people who put in the ads are lazy and go overboard with boilerplate language in it and some "requirements" are there but they may not apply to every job. Does the job actually entail you driving around?
It was alot of assumptions being made. I didn't read the job description in full detail. I didn't pay attention to the fact that driving would be involved.
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Old 03-11-2013, 08:11 PM
Status: "I hate living in Georgia!!" (set 13 days ago)
 
48,149 posts, read 45,495,400 times
Reputation: 15338
At this point, I pretty much know what to do. At this point, I have no choice but to learn how to drive more confidently.
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Old 03-12-2013, 04:50 PM
 
Location: Maryland
18,624 posts, read 16,433,169 times
Reputation: 6348
Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkBunny View Post
What? How about the 8 million people living in New York that don't have cars? Lots of people take public transportation to work. A car can be a liability.
I lived in NYC and never needed a car. However his job is in Texas he needs a car like yesterday.
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Old 03-12-2013, 05:12 PM
 
15,363 posts, read 17,620,172 times
Reputation: 13489
Quote:
Originally Posted by green_mariner View Post
At this point, I pretty much know what to do. At this point, I have no choice but to learn how to drive more confidently.
You'll do fine. Pretty soon it's going to be as easy as walking. In a year you are going to look back on this and realize how far you got. In a year you are going to be a regular driver and you're going to say "I remember when I put this off for way too long and now it's so easy."
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