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Old 07-18-2016, 09:33 PM
 
427 posts, read 379,087 times
Reputation: 428

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My resume has a two year gap on it after finishing college. I have mainly worked short term and short lived odd jobs since then, not holding a job longer than three months.

I just don't think I'm fit for any of the low skill jobs I can qualify for. I'm too slow for restaurant work, too introverted (and passive aggressive) for service, and I'm not strong or good at manual labor. I actually scored .5/10 on a physical strength test, when I went to an employment aptitude test in Chicago. The coarse personalities you have to deal with it in these jobs are also often too much for me to take. I've always tried my best in these capacities but it always ends up in failure, or I just quit because I can't stand it any longer.

I keep saying "I can't," over and over again, and maybe that's what's screwing me. But I've experienced all these fields in some way. I've been willing to try almost anything in the past two years. However, I have continued to avoid telemarketing jobs, insurance sales, door to door sales, all the pyramid schemes, and a lot of the labor gigs and blue collar work.

I find myself pathetic. I have above average intelligence and outstanding creative abilities. I'm a really good musician and made around $100 busking for an hour or two at various locations and times around town. However, I am very paycheck centric. Because all my friends have normal jobs, I feel like a loser for not making anything of myself as far as employment is concerned. One of my roommates, who was cast in a (very) minor roll in a big budget blockbuster starring Tom Cruise, and gets paid stand up comedy gigs, is able to hold down a job waiting tables at a 5 star Hotel in Beverly Hills. This makes me feel even more ineffectual.

I look at my dad, who dropped out of high school, manage to successfully pursue a career as a radio DJ in Northern and Southern California in the 1970s and early 1980s, before pursuing a career in corporate America in the Midwest and making a nice salary, which for the first 22 of my years, allowed me to do whatever I wanted to. He even opened his own (ultimately failed) deli in Santa Maria before he was my age!

All this said, I'm I just not meant to work? Am I meant to live with my family forever in rural Illinois while everyone else is able to find happiness and success?
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Old 07-18-2016, 09:39 PM
 
6,744 posts, read 3,854,200 times
Reputation: 15441
How about Chef School? You can be creative and earn good money, even work on a cruise ship and travel.
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Old 07-18-2016, 10:36 PM
 
17,249 posts, read 10,176,823 times
Reputation: 28762
Can't you hit up your friends to see if they have any job openings?

The only thing that saved my arse back when I was in my mid 20's and practically homeless with no job and money was a friend from my Navy days. He helped refer me to his job, in an industry that I am still in to this day. He let me stay with him and his family for a few months while I got back on my feet. I will forever be grateful for his kindness.

I know that doesn't help you with anything but just in my case I was lost and only a referral saved me. My only other option at the time would have been minimum wage jobs like grocery store clerk. Trust me I tried applying to McDonald's and even pizza delivery with no response. Went to EDD office to search for jobs, nada.

At one point a Marine recruiter near a grocery store I went to kept trying to entice me back into the Marines. I was 25 at the time not too long after leaving the Navy.
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Old 07-18-2016, 11:58 PM
 
427 posts, read 379,087 times
Reputation: 428
Quote:
Originally Posted by Harpaint View Post
How about Chef School? You can be creative and earn good money, even work on a cruise ship and travel.
I was thinking about learning to be a massage therapist. It's a good fit to the lifestyle I want to lead, and I enjoy the prospect of working with my hands and making people feel good. However, I'm not sure if I would just be doing it for the money or if I actually am interested in the profession itself (it's not very mentally stimulating, and I'm not sure if I really believe it actually "heals" people). They can make upwards of 50k in LA, if they have a good practice, so money is a factor as well as not having to sit in an office all day making my boss happy.

But even if I were to pursue this, or something else (which I think would be a good idea), I'm not sure how I'm going to pay rent until I'm finished with the program. I feel completely unemployable right now. I applied at Bed Bath and Beyond because I enjoy the atmosphere of the store and their products and think I would fit in better there than at Walmart, but it's still just a shot in the dark.

I spent several months after college just trying to get a museum job, because I worked at a museum for two years and thought that I could make a go of it. I gave up and then accepted a pizza delivery job. I feel like my soul and hope for the future dies every terrible job I take on. I don't think that some of the posters on City-Data who try to tell me "to work up from the bottom" understand how hard those jobs on your mental health and on your self worth.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Suburban_Guy View Post
Can't you hit up your friends to see if they have any job openings?
I recently got fired from a job I got through a roommate, delivering flowers from a flower store. I don't think it was a very good fit, but it was another crushing blow to my self esteem. Most of my friends are simply working internships and doing the same type of crappy jobs that I'm struggling to get. I really don't have many friends anyway. Just a handful from college, and then my roommates.
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Old 07-19-2016, 04:00 AM
 
903 posts, read 532,939 times
Reputation: 2717
Yeah, you are screwed. One lesson to learn is that, truly, no one cares. No cares if you're sad, depressed,scared etc. Sink or swim, you already sound like you choose to sink. Not trying to come off harsh, but life is going to get really rough and very scary with your attitude. Best of luck
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Old 07-19-2016, 04:10 AM
 
427 posts, read 379,087 times
Reputation: 428
Quote:
Originally Posted by rocky1975 View Post
Yeah, you are screwed. One lesson to learn is that, truly, no one cares. No cares if you're sad, depressed,scared etc. Sink or swim, you already sound like you choose to sink. Not trying to come off harsh, but life is going to get really rough and very scary with your attitude. Best of luck
How did I choose to "sink?" What is wrong with my attitude?
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Old 07-19-2016, 05:04 AM
 
903 posts, read 532,939 times
Reputation: 2717
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
How did I choose to "sink?" What is wrong with my attitude?
I seriously think people like you come on and troll this site, because I don't think most people could survive in the real world with some of the attitudes like this displayed on this forum. How did you choose to sink:
Excuse #1; "My resume has a two year gap on it after finishing college." So what? I have seen and worked with people with much larger gaps who are very successful.

"not holding a job longer than three months." - Whose fault is this?

"I just don't think I'm fit for any of the low skill jobs I can qualify for".: what does that even mean? Are you entitled to something high skill, what have you proven that you can do?

Excuse #2 #3 & #4: "I'm too slow for restaurant work, too introverted (and passive aggressive) for service, and I'm not strong or good at manual labor"

Choosing to sink:
"I keep saying "I can't," over and over again,"
"I find myself pathetic"
"All this said, I'm I just not meant to work?"

I could keep going on, but I think we get the point.
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Old 07-19-2016, 07:55 AM
 
1,374 posts, read 1,333,709 times
Reputation: 1201
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
My resume has a two year gap on it after finishing college. I have mainly worked short term and short lived odd jobs since then, not holding a job longer than three months.

I just don't think I'm fit for any of the low skill jobs I can qualify for. I'm too slow for restaurant work, too introverted (and passive aggressive) for service, and I'm not strong or good at manual labor. I actually scored .5/10 on a physical strength test, when I went to an employment aptitude test in Chicago. The coarse personalities you have to deal with it in these jobs are also often too much for me to take. I've always tried my best in these capacities but it always ends up in failure, or I just quit because I can't stand it any longer.

I keep saying "I can't," over and over again, and maybe that's what's screwing me. But I've experienced all these fields in some way. I've been willing to try almost anything in the past two years. However, I have continued to avoid telemarketing jobs, insurance sales, door to door sales, all the pyramid schemes, and a lot of the labor gigs and blue collar work.

I find myself pathetic. I have above average intelligence and outstanding creative abilities. I'm a really good musician and made around $100 busking for an hour or two at various locations and times around town. However, I am very paycheck centric. Because all my friends have normal jobs, I feel like a loser for not making anything of myself as far as employment is concerned. One of my roommates, who was cast in a (very) minor roll in a big budget blockbuster starring Tom Cruise, and gets paid stand up comedy gigs, is able to hold down a job waiting tables at a 5 star Hotel in Beverly Hills. This makes me feel even more ineffectual.

I look at my dad, who dropped out of high school, manage to successfully pursue a career as a radio DJ in Northern and Southern California in the 1970s and early 1980s, before pursuing a career in corporate America in the Midwest and making a nice salary, which for the first 22 of my years, allowed me to do whatever I wanted to. He even opened his own (ultimately failed) deli in Santa Maria before he was my age!

All this said, I'm I just not meant to work? Am I meant to live with my family forever in rural Illinois while everyone else is able to find happiness and success?
unless you're independently wealthy that the answer to your question is - YES YOU ARE MEANT TO WORK! For goodness sakes - your username is "cryinbaby" and all your posts have a similar "poor me" theme. You are blessed to be in one of the most industrious and liberal countries in the world where there are countless stories from real people (i'm sure you know some) who have "rags to riches" type tales because they WORKED HARD. Work is had for a reason - it's something you do to provide for yourself and pay the bills. I don't believe that people are meant to find a job they love because that's a pretty difficult task for most to do (there are certainly those that do and that's awesome!) But everyone else just needs to find a job they are okay with enough to pay their bills and provide for themselves. You are college educated from a prestigious university - why aren't you using the connections from your school to get a job?
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Old 07-19-2016, 08:30 AM
 
2,078 posts, read 1,854,906 times
Reputation: 2677
You're only screwed if you give up and say 'you can't'.
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Old 07-19-2016, 08:41 AM
 
Location: The Heart of Dixie
1,357 posts, read 1,107,735 times
Reputation: 3438
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
My resume has a two year gap on it after finishing college. I have mainly worked short term and short lived odd jobs since then, not holding a job longer than three months.
Who's fault is that? You either didn't perform or you chose to quit. That's all on you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
I just don't think I'm fit for any of the low skill jobs I can qualify for. I'm too slow for restaurant work, too introverted (and passive aggressive) for service, and I'm not strong or good at manual labor. I actually scored .5/10 on a physical strength test, when I went to an employment aptitude test in Chicago. The coarse personalities you have to deal with it in these jobs are also often too much for me to take. I've always tried my best in these capacities but it always ends up in failure, or I just quit because I can't stand it any longer.
Well, sometimes you have to suck it up and do things that you aren't comfortable with or that you don't really like. It sounds like a lot of excuses to me. Unless you have some sort of handicap, you can speed up for restaurant work, and if you're introverted you can learn to be more outgoing. I was the most backward kid in the world, but when I started working retail, I learned to be more outgoing. Did I enjoy it? Not really, but I did it because I needed a job.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
All this said, I'm I just not meant to work? Am I meant to live with my family forever in rural Illinois while everyone else is able to find happiness and success?
Only you can provide the answer to that question. Stop with the excuses and commit to something.
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