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Old 01-28-2019, 10:48 AM
 
45 posts, read 19,702 times
Reputation: 42

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Hi applej3,

Nobody here is claiming to be a spokesman for the entire Jewish community, the point of this thread is to have a community conversation. Besides the fact that you do not believe we should be having this conversation, do you have anything constructive to add in regard to the actual topic? This is a serious issue with in the Jewish community and discussing whether or not we should be having it does not seem like an optimal use of our time.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:55 AM
 
45 posts, read 19,702 times
Reputation: 42
Hi applej3,

By the way all opinions are welcome.

Last edited by Maccabee36; 01-28-2019 at 11:10 AM..
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Old 01-28-2019, 05:14 PM
 
392 posts, read 122,466 times
Reputation: 517
Actually, I perceived applej3's initial comment as kind of a breath of fresh air. However, we all know that it has nothing to do with ANYTHING on this forum.

Applej3: Just sit back and watch.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:49 PM
 
Location: USA
3,569 posts, read 854,069 times
Reputation: 4167
Quote:
Originally Posted by ben Shunamit View Post
Actually, I perceived applej3's initial comment as kind of a breath of fresh air. However, we all know that it has nothing to do with ANYTHING on this forum.

Applej3: Just sit back and watch.
Oh great. Yet another one acting as a spokesperson. We all know. Really?
Dream on.
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Old 01-28-2019, 10:50 PM
 
Location: USA
3,569 posts, read 854,069 times
Reputation: 4167
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maccabee36 View Post
Hi applej3,

By the way all opinions are welcome.
That's a relief. Whew!
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Old 01-29-2019, 07:25 AM
 
3,951 posts, read 3,339,069 times
Reputation: 1246
Funny. 6 page thread, and nobodyís asked whatís the halacha when your child says they want to marry a goy. Itís only an intellectual excercise for us to discuss what any of us think about the subject. Of course what really matters is what does the Torah tell us to do?
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Old 01-30-2019, 01:04 AM
 
Location: US
27,956 posts, read 15,043,765 times
Reputation: 1734
Quote:
Originally Posted by theflipflop View Post
Funny. 6 page thread, and nobodyís asked whatís the halacha when your child says they want to marry a goy. Itís only an intellectual excercise for us to discuss what any of us think about the subject. Of course what really matters is what does the Torah tell us to do?
And?...
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Old 01-30-2019, 06:39 AM
 
3,951 posts, read 3,339,069 times
Reputation: 1246
Before the wedding day, you are required to do everything you can to talk them out of this mistake. But once the wedding has occurred, you love them and daven for them, buy no longer harass them. Itís not appropriate to shun, either.

But you also can be sure that youíll be baptizing your grandchildren. And keep in mind, itís rarely the childís fault he married out. You should ask yourself if you demonstrated the proper love for Torah and mitzvos. If you gave your child anything less than a childhood full of Torah and mitzvos, then their marrying out is on YOU.
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Old 01-30-2019, 06:50 AM
 
Location: NJ
1,382 posts, read 494,347 times
Reputation: 591
Quote:
Originally Posted by theflipflop View Post
Before the wedding day, you are required to do everything you can to talk them out of this mistake. But once the wedding has occurred, you love them and daven for them, buy no longer harass them. Itís not appropriate to shun, either.

But you also can be sure that youíll be baptizing your grandchildren. And keep in mind, itís rarely the childís fault he married out. You should ask yourself if you demonstrated the proper love for Torah and mitzvos. If you gave your child anything less than a childhood full of Torah and mitzvos, then their marrying out is on YOU.
I'm not sure that this is entirely true. While a solid grounding in torah and mitzvot will help avoid the issue, unless we choose to live in ghettos and choose not to mix with other people, there is always the chance that, despite our knowledge, our emotions will pull us in another direction. Additionally, the parent-child relationship should have more dimensions than just for Judaism. If the parents show love for Torah and model and expect adherence to halacha, but their relationship with the children is independently toxic, the result might be that the child moves the other way. It is impossible to lay all the blame at the feet of a single cause.
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Old 01-30-2019, 10:27 AM
 
3,951 posts, read 3,339,069 times
Reputation: 1246
I donít disagree with any of that Rosends. While a Torah life does not guarantee your children will stay on the derech, a lack of one almost certainly guarantees the end of that familyís Jewish lineage within another couple generations.

Mrs Flop and I always comment how chazal knew what they were doing when they codified the laws of kashrus. It really does keep Yidden from fraternizing with the goyim, and thereby reduces the risk, Chas víshalom, that we would marry one of them.
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