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Old 04-08-2019, 05:47 AM
 
45 posts, read 19,702 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taksan View Post
I think all you can do is expose them to the culture ( and keep the culture central in their daily lives). Religious observance can vary wildly but those Jewish communities that keep rather traditional culture around the family like my family did tend to raise children that do the same and are less likely to intermarry.
Hi Taksan,

You are definitely right that keeping Jewish traditions central in the daily lives of our children is important to raising Jewish kids that will continue Judaism. It would be nice if all families did the same.

I would like to add that belief should also be a central aspect of of our childrenís lives. There are so many Jews today who donít even have a basic belief in G-d. Perhaps that is part of the issue. What do you think?
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Old 04-08-2019, 06:19 AM
 
563 posts, read 55,311 times
Reputation: 358
I've read through this thread and, unless I've missed it somewhere, there's one aspect of intermarriage that I don't think has been brought up.

Obviously, a great concern about intermarriage (and this applies to people of all faiths, not just the Jewish faith) revolves around the resulting children of the marriage and how to bring them up.

But what about older people who marry not to raise a family, but only to share their remaining years together and support each other? What about couples where the woman is beyond child-bearing age?
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Old 04-08-2019, 01:45 PM
 
Location: Naples FL
602 posts, read 137,131 times
Reputation: 876
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maccabee36 View Post
Hi Taksan,

You are definitely right that keeping Jewish traditions central in the daily lives of our children is important to raising Jewish kids that will continue Judaism. It would be nice if all families did the same.

I would like to add that belief should also be a central aspect of of our childrenís lives. There are so many Jews today who donít even have a basic belief in G-d. Perhaps that is part of the issue. What do you think?
Donít ask me Iím one of them .... works for me

Iím racially , ethnically and very culturally a Eastern European Jew but Iíve seen too much weirdness to subscribe to any religious theories.
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Old 04-09-2019, 06:47 AM
 
13,092 posts, read 13,685,110 times
Reputation: 9156
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachel NewYork View Post
I've read through this thread and, unless I've missed it somewhere, there's one aspect of intermarriage that I don't think has been brought up.

Obviously, a great concern about intermarriage (and this applies to people of all faiths, not just the Jewish faith) revolves around the resulting children of the marriage and how to bring them up.

But what about older people who marry not to raise a family, but only to share their remaining years together and support each other? What about couples where the woman is beyond child-bearing age?
It's about living a Jewish life, having a Jewish marriage, and sharing a Jewish home. Judaism is central regardless of whether someone is older or done having kids.
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Old 04-09-2019, 09:12 AM
 
Location: U.S.A
54 posts, read 6,438 times
Reputation: 76
Ethical thinking is the highest, and the most desirable quality in a human being. Religion does not lead ethics, it follows.

A persons religion or lack of religion, professional conduct, raising children, cooking, driving, whatever, these things follow ' Ethics ' If you are married to a person of good ethics, a person of high quality. It's a person you genuinely love. A person who is uniquely set apart from all others for the sake of ethics. A person who is in the true sense in every way a soul mate. Then you can truly ask for nothing more.

A persons religious values can change, but ethics will usually remain constant.

Last edited by Jacob II; 04-09-2019 at 10:30 AM..
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Old 04-09-2019, 09:45 AM
 
563 posts, read 55,311 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tzaphkiel View Post
It's about living a Jewish life, having a Jewish marriage, and sharing a Jewish home. Judaism is central regardless of whether someone is older or done having kids.

Yes, of course. I get that. I do know of an older, childless couple who have made Judaism a central part of their lives. The wife is Jewish, the husband is not. When the non-Jewish spouse is asked about whether he has converted, his reply is always: "Not yet."
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Old 04-09-2019, 10:27 AM
 
392 posts, read 122,466 times
Reputation: 517
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacob II View Post
Ethical thinking is the highest, and the most desirable quality in a human being. Religion does not lead ethics, it follows.

A persons religion or lack of religion, professional conduct, raising children, cooking, driving, whatever, these things follow ' Ethics ' If you are married to a person of good ethics, and person of high quality. It's a person you genuinely love. A person who is uniquely set apart from all others for the sake of ethics. A person who is in the true sense in every way a soul mate. Then you can truly ask for nothing more.

A persons religious thoughts can change, but ethics will usually remain constant.
I like your post, and I mostly agree with it. However, I believe that the bolded sentence may be true, or the reverse of the truth, depending on each individual case. In fact, it is my opinion that religion may even transmit ethics across a generation. That is, the ethics of the grandparents may have gone from the grandparents through the atheist children to the grandchildren. The grandchildren then may or may not follow the religion of the grandparents, but apparently have their ethics, which may, IMO, have their source in the religion.

Obviously, I accept both possibilities with the bolded sentence. Just wanted to point out that I am not convinced that there is only one answer.
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Old 04-09-2019, 11:50 AM
Status: "Smacking fundies." (set 1 day ago)
 
Location: Ontario, Canada
25,789 posts, read 13,404,281 times
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Intermarriage - What should we do about it?

Toast the happy couple and wish them well.
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:33 PM
 
Location: U.S.A
54 posts, read 6,438 times
Reputation: 76
Well the only thing we can do is put it to a test:


Ethics does not lead religion, it follows. /// Religion does not lead ethics, it follows.

It could be that both are true. There is still a lot of divorce within Judaism. I tend to think that it is not attributed to religion or ethics. The root cause of divorce ( IMO ) is the sensitive timing of the mind. We all have a mental mechanism of timing. In order for us to connect with another person in the most positive way, the synchronization must meet a specified minimum/maximum polarity.

For instance . . . Lets compare a man and woman who are sitting in an office. Both are going to perform a test. They are going to be instructed to leave and walk 2500 ft to a store and purchase 1 bottle of water and return to the office. They do this separately.

Ideally they should be within a few minutes of each other to mark some compatible timing attribute. Being fast or slow in not paramount. It's being within the same basic time frame that counts. They could both be the same religion and it won't matter. If one is constantly waiting on the other all through life. It will eventually take a toll. It causes aggravation, and will just get worse over time. This is actually one of the origins of failed marriages.

Saying that religion matters is like saying politics matters. All those things can change, and often do. But that inner timing within the mind will always be the same. Combine that with solid grounded ethics. Isn't that what Judaism mostly promotes ? Doing the right thing.

We may not be able to make religion important to anyone. But ethics will always win our battle. Even if we are standing all alone.
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Old 04-09-2019, 05:19 PM
 
3,951 posts, read 3,339,069 times
Reputation: 1246
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacob II View Post
Well the only thing we can do is put it to a test:


Ethics does not lead religion, it follows. /// Religion does not lead ethics, it follows.

It could be that both are true. There is still a lot of divorce within Judaism. I tend to think that it is not attributed to religion or ethics. The root cause of divorce ( IMO ) is the sensitive timing of the mind. We all have a mental mechanism of timing. In order for us to connect with another person in the most positive way, the synchronization must meet a specified minimum/maximum polarity.

For instance . . . Lets compare a man and woman who are sitting in an office. Both are going to perform a test. They are going to be instructed to leave and walk 2500 ft to a store and purchase 1 bottle of water and return to the office. They do this separately.

Ideally they should be within a few minutes of each other to mark some compatible timing attribute. Being fast or slow in not paramount. It's being within the same basic time frame that counts. They could both be the same religion and it won't matter. If one is constantly waiting on the other all through life. It will eventually take a toll. It causes aggravation, and will just get worse over time. This is actually one of the origins of failed marriages.

Saying that religion matters is like saying politics matters. All those things can change, and often do. But that inner timing within the mind will always be the same. Combine that with solid grounded ethics. Isn't that what Judaism mostly promotes ? Doing the right thing.

We may not be able to make religion important to anyone. But ethics will always win our battle. Even if we are standing all alone.
You appear to have a nice grasp of exactly half of what you are talking about. We really appreciate you coming into this forum to describe Jewish belief in any way.
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