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Old 08-27-2012, 03:50 PM
 
17 posts, read 30,589 times
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@S.Davis I stay in the westport area and thats my main thing, there is really nothing to do but the bar and club scene here which is one of the factors that made this the worst place to be single, lack of things for singles to do (or would do). Im all about the approach during the day but my female friend says things like the crime rate and stuff like that in such a small city has people on the fence with that which is strange because crime is everywhere. I noticed that too because people are always like "well the crime rate is bad here O_o". @Jason87x All im saying is theres good places and theres bad places and this happens to be one of the more bad places to be single. @MrIndependent I noticed that too, people seem to be big on getting married, getting engaged, and having babies which by all means is the right thing to do but alot of people here seem to do it because like this one girl told me in a uncertain tone and unsure facial expression and smirk (while turning her ring like it was controlling her) its the IN thing to do O_O.
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Old 08-27-2012, 04:40 PM
 
Location: IN
20,170 posts, read 34,488,778 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
@S.Davis I stay in the westport area and thats my main thing, there is really nothing to do but the bar and club scene here which is one of the factors that made this the worst place to be single, lack of things for singles to do (or would do). Im all about the approach during the day but my female friend says things like the crime rate and stuff like that in such a small city has people on the fence with that which is strange because crime is everywhere. I noticed that too because people are always like "well the crime rate is bad here O_o". @Jason87x All im saying is theres good places and theres bad places and this happens to be one of the more bad places to be single. @MrIndependent I noticed that too, people seem to be big on getting married, getting engaged, and having babies which by all means is the right thing to do but alot of people here seem to do it because like this one girl told me in a uncertain tone and unsure facial expression and smirk (while turning her ring like it was controlling her) its the IN thing to do O_O.
I wonder if many of these "behaviors" or social culture in general are highly related to socioeconomic factors? I also think that getting married and having a kid or kids is more strongly ingrained in lower cost of living metro areas compared to places that are more expensive where people tend to wait longer.
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Old 08-27-2012, 04:46 PM
 
17 posts, read 30,589 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GraniteStater View Post
I wonder if many of these "behaviors" or social culture in general are highly related to socioeconomic factors? I also think that getting married and having a kid or kids is more strongly ingrained in lower cost of living metro areas compared to places that are more expensive where people tend to wait longer.

Thats some good insight never thought about it but it makes alot of sense.
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Old 08-27-2012, 09:33 PM
 
Location: Cleverly concealed
889 posts, read 1,428,548 times
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No one is behind the curve like me-- I'll be 36 this year, and never married. Don't feel bad about "only" getting married and having kids around age 30.

I've met a surprising number of women who have followed boyfriends to Kansas City, and not surprisingly, it hasn't always worked out for them. I met one who followed a guy from Texas to Michigan, back to Texas, and to Kansas City, then broke up with him a year later.

Breaking up the group is another challenge. Most people go out to have fun with their friends, with no intention of meeting new people. That's the way it seems whenever I'm out. That's the way it happened when I lived in Minneapolis too. I went out with co-workers, and it seemed impossible to meet anyone outside that circle.

But I can't complain about dating in KC, because my lack of success is my fault. It's terribly difficult for me to approach people; I have an off-center personality; I am the wallflower.
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Old 08-27-2012, 11:25 PM
 
196 posts, read 291,606 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
People here seem to be very closed minded and socilally conditioned here to the point its ludacris lol.
Woah, I was interested in what you had to say UNTIL you got to that part ; that was sort of...uncalled for (not to mention insulting). You really think a city metro with a population over 2 million can be fairly described as "closed minded" or "socially conditioned"? You've got to be kidding me. I know plenty of intelligent, open-minded, and cultured people here in the metro; trust me they are NOT a minority.

I realize you're not happy with this "lack of adult dating" phenomenon in KC (I can't really understand it myself, but it may or may not have something to do with the city's culture). I can't even imagine how uncomfortable it is for you as a transplant to find the right singles. But if you're going to say something critical about KC's dating scene, at least be more constructive and don't smear the entire city population as being "closed minded" and "socially conditioned".

Last edited by MidWestCityNative; 08-27-2012 at 11:39 PM..
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Old 08-27-2012, 11:37 PM
 
196 posts, read 291,606 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GraniteStater View Post
I wonder if many of these "behaviors" or social culture in general are highly related to socioeconomic factors? I also think that getting married and having a kid or kids is more strongly ingrained in lower cost of living metro areas compared to places that are more expensive where people tend to wait longer.
I think you might be right about that. Others on this forum like to assume it has something to do with "provincialism" or "rural culture" of KC's exurbia, but I honestly don't think that's the reason for it (my parents got married at an early age and neither are from a rural area; not even my grandparents). What you said could be the likeliest reason as to why a bigger % of the metro get married out of high school/college.

Last edited by MidWestCityNative; 08-27-2012 at 11:51 PM..
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Old 08-28-2012, 07:34 AM
 
Location: Tower Grove East, St. Louis, MO
12,064 posts, read 27,212,345 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MidWestCityNative View Post
Woah, I was interested in what you had to say UNTIL you got to that part ; that was sort of...uncalled for (not to mention insulting). You really think a city metro with a population over 2 million can be fairly described as "closed minded" or "socially conditioned"? You've got to be kidding me. I know plenty of intelligent, open-minded, and cultured people here in the metro; trust me they are NOT a minority.

I realize you're not happy with this "lack of adult dating" phenomenon in KC (I can't really understand it myself, but it may or may not have something to do with the city's culture). I can't even imagine how uncomfortable it is for you as a transplant to find the right singles. But if you're going to say something critical about KC's dating scene, at least be more constructive and don't smear the entire city population as being "closed minded" and "socially conditioned".
Not to mention it's ludicrous, not ludacris. That made me literally LOL.
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Old 08-28-2012, 08:37 AM
 
2,195 posts, read 2,145,372 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
@S.Davis I stay in the westport area and thats my main thing, there is really nothing to do but the bar and club scene here
Off the top of my head I can think of nearly 20 "things to do" that are not-so-secretly designed for people to meet potential dates/mates. Maybe you need to expand your comfort zone a little. Most of the people I know who have trouble meeting people they like or would like to date are usually in a "nothing to do but bars" rut. There are literally hundreds of things to do in this city besides bars.

I've met a lot of very cool, interesting, fun women in bars, but not a single one of them thought the only fun thing to do in life (in KC or anywhere else) was "go out to bars", because those people are boring. Are you boring? Because if you are, you'll meet a lot of other boring people. Usually the best way to not be boring -- or bored -- and to meet interesting people, is to broaden your interests.

Last edited by SPonteKC; 08-28-2012 at 08:46 AM..
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Old 08-28-2012, 08:53 AM
 
Location: Kansas City, MO
5,758 posts, read 9,489,324 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RadioSilence View Post

Breaking up the group is another challenge. Most people go out to have fun with their friends, with no intention of meeting new people. That's the way it seems whenever I'm out. That's the way it happened when I lived in Minneapolis too. I went out with co-workers, and it seemed impossible to meet anyone outside that circle.
That's a very accurate view of how things are in general here. I cant criticize because I am guilty of it as well. My friends and I usually go out as a group and usually pick a spot in the bar and hang out together. We might briefly interact with other people but dont really have any goals to meet other people.
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Old 08-28-2012, 04:17 PM
 
17 posts, read 30,589 times
Reputation: 13
@midwestcitynative
I never said anyone was not intelligent. And just like you know a vast majority that are...I know a vast majority that are not and if your insulted by it dont take it so personal. Im not talking about you or your friends who ive never met so dont wear the shoes. When I said socilally conditioned I mean that people here in general feel that its best to get married (or close to marriage), have the kids and hopefully live happily ever after at a very young age. If not that get into serious relationships, or just plain out have kids simply because its the thing to do. Because its in the culture here most people tend to be what they are expected to be. When I speak on closed minded yes, a majority of the people ive met are closed to meeting new people, some of the things ive seen, to the cultural divide here seems to give off the vibe that alot of people are closed minded here. I dont mean all 2 million people, and Im not trying to insult but from my stand point a good majority are like that.And yes thats what the post is about the disapointment in the dating scene here so im glad you realized at least that.@aragx6yeah no spell check on but the world still continues to spin and I think all is good.
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