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Old 08-28-2012, 04:31 PM
 
17 posts, read 30,605 times
Reputation: 13

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Quote:
Originally Posted by s.davis View Post
Off the top of my head I can think of nearly 20 "things to do" that are not-so-secretly designed for people to meet potential dates/mates. Maybe you need to expand your comfort zone a little. Most of the people I know who have trouble meeting people they like or would like to date are usually in a "nothing to do but bars" rut. There are literally hundreds of things to do in this city besides bars.

I've met a lot of very cool, interesting, fun women in bars, but not a single one of them thought the only fun thing to do in life (in KC or anywhere else) was "go out to bars", because those people are boring. Are you boring? Because if you are, you'll meet a lot of other boring people. Usually the best way to not be boring -- or bored -- and to meet interesting people, is to broaden your interests.
@s.davis Umm I never said anything about anyone being borng so im not sure where that came from but to answer your off the wall question no im not boring. And Im not big on the bar scene and shouldnt have to be to meet interesting people...which is exactly what im saying. Besides the bar name some of these 100's of intersting places that are happening in the city im all eyes, and open to go because from what Im see most of the intersting places to go here are very family oriented but please prove me wrong....
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Old 08-28-2012, 05:37 PM
 
196 posts, read 291,690 times
Reputation: 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
@midwestcitynative
I never said anyone was not intelligent. And just like you know a vast majority that are...I know a vast majority that are not and if your insulted by it dont take it so personal. Im not talking about you or your friends who ive never met so dont wear the shoes. When I said socilally conditioned I mean that people here in general feel that its best to get married (or close to marriage), have the kids and hopefully live happily ever after at a very young age. If not that get into serious relationships, or just plain out have kids simply because its the thing to do. Because its in the culture here most people tend to be what they are expected to be. When I speak on closed minded yes, a majority of the people ive met are closed to meeting new people, some of the things ive seen, to the cultural divide here seems to give off the vibe that alot of people are closed minded here. I dont mean all 2 million people, and Im not trying to insult but from my stand point a good majority are like that.And yes thats what the post is about the disapointment in the dating scene here so im glad you realized at least that.@aragx6yeah no spell check on but the world still continues to spin and I think all is good.
Okay first of all, when I said "NOT a minority" I didn't exactly mean they are the "vast majority". Like I said, I know plenty of intelligent people here...they may not make up the "vast majority", but I wouldn't classify them as a hard-to-find minority either.

Secondly, the term "closed minded" can be interpreted in a number of ways. It is typically used to describe people who simply refuse or are too unsophisticated to accept or tolerate different people or cultures (i.e. racism, bigotry). People who selfishly refuse to value diversity are "closed minded"; but I'm pretty certain that's not what you meant.

People in KC do tend to have sort of a cliquish mentality (as do a lot of midwestern metros), and it could be a good or bad thing depending on your point of view. That doesn't mean that they're "closed minded", they just approach social situations in a more conventional or conservative manner. You being a transplant are probably more interested in a very outgoing social scene with lots of adult singles. Because KC tends to be more of a family-oriented metro, it might be a little harder to find that social scene you're looking for, but don't assume that it's simply non-existent here. My advice would be to just look for the right areas of the metro to live and work. Look at the glass as half-full and don't give up your search.

If all else fails, try hooking up with someone online.
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Old 08-29-2012, 01:05 AM
 
17 posts, read 30,605 times
Reputation: 13
well to be honest with you this place doesnt do to well on the accepting culture either. Im from london, white male, been many other places in america and I have never in life seen such a racially segregated city. Me and my sister drove east and noticed that all african americans for the most part stay over there. Her friend stays off highland. Also she says that people have a hard time excepting interacial dating rather its white asian, black white or whatever the flavor maybe be....so yeah closed minded could fall in that area...
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Old 08-29-2012, 07:00 AM
 
Location: Tower Grove East, St. Louis, MO
12,064 posts, read 27,216,465 times
Reputation: 3739
Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
well to be honest with you this place doesnt do to well on the accepting culture either. Im from london, white male, been many other places in america and I have never in life seen such a racially segregated city. Me and my sister drove east and noticed that all african americans for the most part stay over there. Her friend stays off highland. Also she says that people have a hard time excepting interacial dating rather its white asian, black white or whatever the flavor maybe be....so yeah closed minded could fall in that area...
^Thankfully I can say from personal experience that I haven't found that to be at all true.
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Old 08-29-2012, 12:51 PM
 
196 posts, read 291,690 times
Reputation: 160
Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
well to be honest with you this place doesnt do to well on the accepting culture either. Im from london, white male, been many other places in america and I have never in life seen such a racially segregated city. Me and my sister drove east and noticed that all african americans for the most part stay over there. Her friend stays off highland. Also she says that people have a hard time excepting interacial dating rather its white asian, black white or whatever the flavor maybe be....so yeah closed minded could fall in that area...
KC residents are naturally-born racists and segregationists...right, gotcha

Seriously though, that's a bunch of BS. In the 26 years I've lived my life in this city, I personally have never met anyone who is afraid of minorities, foreigners, and/or opposed to interracial relationships. None of my family and friends/acquaintances are like that at all; so I really don't know what you are talking about. Also if KC is racist, why do we have a black mayor?

KC's problems really aren't unlike a lot cities here in the United States, but it sounds to me like you have a very jaded, black and white view of this city. I wish I could offer more advice, but because of what you just said, it would be hard for me to reason with you at this point.

The only thing I can really say is KC has plenty of problems, there's no denying that. Like many American cities, racism and intolerance can rear its ugly head every once in a while, but if you look at the big picture...KC has much more caring, helpful, and down-to-earth people.

If you can't see that (or refuse to see it), perhaps you have let your doubts and pessimism get the best of you. Frankly, I'm saddened that you're not having a good time living here. If you feel KC is not the right fit for you, then you might want to consider looking into other cities that best fit your own criteria.

I don't know what else to say.

Last edited by MidWestCityNative; 08-29-2012 at 01:07 PM..
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Old 08-29-2012, 01:56 PM
 
1,830 posts, read 3,110,519 times
Reputation: 532
I know of many interracial couples in KC including those with kids and have never heard any issues with it, but with one exception. Some friends, a Latino woman married to a gringo gets hassled by Mexican immigrants she works with, calling her kid a coconut, but they've never had any indication of 'intolerance' by anyone else. But yes, there is some segregation here, as with Chicago and many other cities. NYC has many many hoods of mostly one ethnic identity. S Central LA is very black, E LA is very Latino. Most LA burbs are very white. Many cities have segregated sections and some mixed areas. In KC, the most mixed areas are midtown and NE side.
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Old 08-29-2012, 02:59 PM
 
2,195 posts, read 2,146,270 times
Reputation: 1916
Quick Quibble: I'm pretty sure South Central LA is now majority hispanic.

And while I've no doubt that interracial couple face plenty of discomfort and discrimination the only person I have ever heard even mention it is a Chicago-transplant who was deeply bothered by the amount of interracial couple he notices in KC and claimed repeatedly (and falsely, it goes without saying) that "you just don't see that kind of thing in Chicago".
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Old 08-29-2012, 03:14 PM
 
2,195 posts, read 2,146,270 times
Reputation: 1916
Quote:
Originally Posted by qdown View Post
@s.davis Umm I never said anything about anyone being borng so im not sure where that came from but to answer your off the wall question no im not boring. And Im not big on the bar scene and shouldnt have to be to meet interesting people...which is exactly what im saying. Besides the bar name some of these 100's of intersting places that are happening in the city im all eyes, and open to go because from what Im see most of the intersting places to go here are very family oriented but please prove me wrong....
It was kind of tongue-in-cheek, but seriously. Do a little digging. I'm not a life coach. Check out Young Friends of Art, the Writer's Place readings, Uptown Arts Bar, Electromedioscope events, Drinking Liberally (or whatever the conservative version is), contradancing, anarchist soccer in Loose Park, kickball, whatever. Broaden your net a bit and get creative. When young single people are out of their homes, wherever they are at, they're pretty much trying to meet other young single people who they might like.
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Old 08-29-2012, 06:17 PM
 
Location: Fly Over Country
75 posts, read 110,580 times
Reputation: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by s.davis View Post
Check out Young Friends of Art
I had a blast when I was a member back in 90s.
Highly recommended.
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Old 08-30-2012, 10:27 AM
 
Location: CasaMo
15,294 posts, read 7,151,642 times
Reputation: 16384
Go to any city forum here and you'll find a thread saying how bad it is in that city. Or people ask about the "dating scene". In reality, there's no such thing. The real world isn't a sit-com.
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