why are people not moving into kentucky? (Lexington, Louisville: transfer to, school)

[missymomof3]

Originally Posted by urbancharlotte

I grew up in Greenup county. I am a 37 year old white female. I can't tell you exactly why I HATE my former home so much without getting too personal so bare with me on my descriptions of what I've gone through. I will say that almost five years ago, I met a wonderful man from North Carolina. He lived in the Greenup area with me for nearly 3 years before we decided to move to his home town of Charlotte. I have three sons from a previous marriage. They began to love and enjoy their time with my current husband more than they did with their biological father. My current husband NEVER NEVER NEVER tried to take my sons father's place. My current husband even paid a child support payment to my ex-husband while I was in nursing school. I had joint custody of my son's but their dad still demanded and got an order to make me pay him money. If he did not get paid, he was going to put me in jail. He was a VERY abusive man all throughout our marriage and he decided that he would now use our children as a means to abuse me even more. I got fed up and decided to fight him back in court. When I did, he brainwashed my kids into thinking that I was a liar and a no good mother. I am a freaking nurse on my second marriage. Their dad is some payday loan employee on his 4th marriage. He's even got another kid on the way!!! I am living in a 4 bedroom townhouse and their dad is renting. The courts in EKY gave my ex EVERYTHING he wanted!!! Eventhough they knew I had a better home and two out of three of my sons wanted to live with me before their father brainwashed them against me and my current husband. My current husband took those boys on camping trips, their first ever NBA game, and funded a trip to a UK basketball camp that their father couldn't afford. He did LOTS LOTS more for me and my sons that their lousy father either didn't have time to do or simply did not have the money to do. My current husband even put me through nursing school while paying my ex child support on my behalf. I am currently furthering my education in Charlotte and my current husband is still having to pay my ex a child support for kids that won't even visit or call. The courts in EKY told me that I needed to leave my current husband if I wished to have a relationship with my sons. They told me this because this is what my kids told the courts. My kids never felt that way until their father brainwashed them. The courts know that my kids have been brainwashed because it is documented that all three boys have changed their stories more than once during this whole court mess. No woman in EKY has had my problems with the courts. I am convinced that I am being punished for falling in love with a black man. I HATE EKY WITH A PASSION!!! I wished I had left back in 1989 the day I graduated Greenup County High and never looked back. Life would have been so much better for me. EKY just doesn't represent the person I am nor does it represent my spirit. My relationship with my sons may be lost for good, but at least I have a step-son and a husband that loves me. I think my son's in KY loves me too. They are just too afraid to show it right now because of their father. I beat myself up everyday for failing to get them away from their dad. I seriously thought at one point that their biological dad was what they needed. I was DEAD WRONG and I'm not afraid to admit that now. I wish anybody that's reading this listen to my warning. If your first marriage failed due to an abusive narcissistic husband, DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO PROTECT YOUR KIDS FROM THEIR FATHER'S INFLUENCE. I was young, naive, and just plain stupid. The prejudice court system did not help the matter neither. At any rate, I am currently enjoying my new found hobby in Charlotte. My husband and I go around town taking videos of Charlotte's growing urban side. The city is still considered by many to be suburban but we enjoy showing it off on youtube anyway. Here is our link www.youtube.com/urbancharlotte

My hatred for EKY is just an EKY hatred. Louisville and Lex are okay with me!!!

I am sorry to hear about your situation but you cannot judge an entire area based on that.

[InLondon]

I must say some people have really strange observations about a certain state or region. I mean seriously, some of the stuff posted here is ridiculous and of course full of lies. What does "urbancharlotte's" post even have to do with the topic of this thread? Oh and the original poster who started this to begin with obviously didn't take time to look at census figures to see that the state has steadily grown for years and years now........thank you.

[urbancharlotte]

Originally Posted by missymomof3

I am sorry to hear about your situation but you cannot judge an entire area based on that.

My judgement of EKY is based on 35 years of living there. My problems with my ex was just the icing on the cake for me. Again, I could go on all day talking about why I don't like the area I am from. I do know that EKY is proud and those who are proud of EKY should stay there. Those like myself should do EVERYBODY else a favor and leave. It is just that simple. EKY is not for everybody. Neither is Charlotte. It all depends on what you want in life. I have met SEVEN friends from my High School here in the Charlotte area. They have been down here much longer than I have. I had no clue they were down here until I ran into them at one of the malls, at a restaurant, or while riding the train. One of those friends is a homosexual male and he just simply got tired of EKY's homophobic culture. Charlotte is a southern bible belt city, yet it welcomed him much better than his own home. He owns a restaurant in Charlotte's south side. Another friend of mine down here from school is a black male who now lives in Concord NC (15 minutes from Charlotte). He was our prom king and our school almost cancelled the king/queen dance because his date was a white girl. I am not alone in leaving KY. I am one of MANY!!! Please, don't get mad at me or take offense towards me for not liking EKY. I had a horrible life there and things turned around the minute I left. It is what it is. Once I left, I realized that I am not culturally instep with MOST of EKY. I fit in SO much better in Charlotte. The only places in KY that I still love is Louisville and Lexington. I could also live just south of Cincy. Anywhere else, I'd probably have to pass. Even in the parts of KY I would consider moving to, I can't park the car at a train station and ride the train to school. I only gas up my car once a month in Charlotte!!! At this point in my life, KY would be a step backwards to me right now. That is why I said that KY in NOTHING like the rest of the south. Atlanta and Charlotte alone are almost light years ahead of anything in KY. I did not feel this way when I lived in KY. Now that I have moved away, the difference is just too obvious. If you don't believe the rest of the south is ahead of KY when it comes to progress, take a close look at my link www.youtube.com/urbancharlotte.

[urbancharlotte]

Originally Posted by InLondon

I must say some people have really strange observations about a certain state or region. I mean seriously, some of the stuff posted here is ridiculous and of course full of lies. What does "urbancharlotte's" post even have to do with the topic of this thread? Oh and the original poster who started this to begin with obviously didn't take time to look at census figures to see that the state has steadily grown for years and years now........thank you.

Put your civic pride to the side for just one minute. Please understand that I am A 37 YEAR OLD WHITE FEMALE FROM EASTERN KENTUCKY. I am married to A 28 YEAR OLD BLACK MALE FROM CHARLOTTE. My home area DISCRIMINATED AGAINST ME in ways my current home HAS NOT!!! Nobody in Charlotte cares about my husband and I. Eastern KY did!!! The courts were so blinded by their own prejudices that they gave custody of innocent children to AN ABUSIVE FATHER!!! I don't care what anybody thinks or feels about my situation. All I know is that there is an extremely ugly side to EKY that NOBODY is willing to do anything about. Heck, most people are not even willing to admit that a problem exist. That is why I've done good ole Kentucky and myself a big favor and GOT THE HECK OUT!!! My only regret is that I failed in getting my sons out too. They are teenagers and can make their own decisions. I pray for my sons everyday because they want to leave, but they are afraid of their dad's reaction. He is a violent man when things don't go his way. This is why my kids are with their father. This is why they told the courts they wished to stay with their dad. The few times I hear from my kids, they whisper over the phone that they love me. It is a whisper because they are afraid of their dad hearing them say it. Keep in mind that the courts had ALL of this information when they decided to give him custodial status. The courts and my own attorney told me that "things would be different if I would just leave my husband". This is the same husband that put me through nursing school and treated my kids better than their own father did. The ONLY thing my husband did wrong was being born black. The ONLY thing I did wrong was not seeing him as black.

If you love KY, then love it. I don't care. Everybody has a right to an opinion. I just don't think it is fair to the rest of the south for KY to compare itself to the south. The south is FREAKING BOOMING!!! I found out in school that the county I live in has a net migration of about 25,000 people per year. That is 250,000 people every census for just one county!!! 250,000 people every census is what the ENTIRE state of KY is doing!!! Raleigh NC's county (Wake county) also adds the exact same amount of people as Charlotte's. When two counties in the same southern state has DOUBLE the new residents as the ENTIRE state of KY, KY is doing something wrong. Maybe KY should try harded to keep those who grew up there like myself and my friends rather than trying to bring in newcomers. A change in the culture of Eastern KY would be a huge help!!!

[urbancharlotte]

Sorry about my long comments. This is just a topic I feel VERY strong about. My goal is to help KY look into the mirror for a change. I have lived 35 of my 37 years in KY. KY is almost no longer in my heart. Something is wrong with that picture. I hope my opinions could help KY change for the better. Please don't take offense. My comments sound harsh, but I really have had a bad experience. EKY's "culture" and my unwillingness to conform to that "culture" had alot to do with my misfortunes. It is hard to love your home when your home is the place where you had the most pain in life. Those of you who are still in KY probably had a better life than I did. I started living and enjoying life when I left. I would have gone crazy if I had stayed. I truly believe that God gave me the courage I needed to leave. It did not matter where I went to. Just as long as I left EKY. The depression of fighting a corrupt court system, an abusive ex-husband, and three sons that will do and say anything that abusive ex tells them to was just too much for me. Mentally, physically, and spiritually. The situation and the area I left is in God's hands now. I have washed my hands clean. My friends from High school down here have similar stories and feel the same way I do. I am not crazy nor am I alone in my feeling about EKY the way I do. Again, central and western KY is not the area I am talking about. My hatred is the US 23 corridor from Louisa to South Shore. This was my area. Now I am "urbancharlotte" and proud of it!!! Actually my husband and I both are "urbancharlotte". We both post under the same user name.

[Jamie40829]

As for Kentucky being south.. it is definetly not. I lived in the south... Greensboro North Carolina..... trust me. Kentucky is much more akin to the midwest culturewise and economically wise than it is to the redneck south

[urbancharlotte]

Originally Posted by Jamie40829

As for Kentucky being south.. it is definetly not. I lived in the south... Greensboro North Carolina..... trust me. Kentucky is much more akin to the midwest culturewise and economically wise than it is to the redneck south

Kentucky is 90.2% white as of 2006. North Carolina is 74% white as of 2006. Charlotte is 55% white. Louisville is 60% white. Sounds like the pot calling the kettle black to me!!!

Also, more than half of the "southerners" in Charlotte have NYC accents. Due to economic growth down here, native New Yorkers (like my husband) have been moving here in VERY large numbers for decades now. The NYC culture here is why this "southern" city built a 1/2 billion dollar light rail line and is about to build a 1 billion dollar extension of this line. If this is the "redneck south" then I must be a proud redneck!!!

[EVAunit1981]

Originally Posted by Jamie40829

As for Kentucky being south.. it is definetly not. I lived in the south... Greensboro North Carolina..... trust me. Kentucky is much more akin to the midwest culturewise and economically wise than it is to the redneck south

Have you ever heard of Benton KY? The KKK is pretty active there.

[missymomof3]

Am I the only one who thinks that Southern doesn't necessarily = redneck or vice versa????? How silly and ignorant!

[marmac]

I see an ex-Kentuckian (age 37) has married a man (age 28) and is blasting Kentucky.

Since you stated your 28 year old husband pays your bills (your child support) I would say you lucked out by robbing the cradle and getting a sugar daddy at the same time.