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Old 03-22-2012, 09:12 PM
 
8,831 posts, read 4,996,172 times
Reputation: 2329
Quote:
Originally Posted by las vegas drunk View Post
I know I have posted about her many times, but it has been a love hate relationship from the start. We became a couple in 1996, and officially broke up in 1999 when I left her for a much younger girl who ended up being a nasty (fill in the blank). I was too young and immature to have any sort of relationship at that time. During this time of my stupidity, my girlfriend ended up meeting a rich millionaire that was her age but soon after and he turned out to be a total jerk after wasting 5 years of her time. We rekindled our relationship in 2008, but began fighting again soon after. Now that both of us are both older (she is now 54, and I am 36), we both realized our mistakes. She is my soul mate, that is all there is to it. I cannot believe I am saying this, but there might even be wedding bells in the future. She has told me that I have to straighten out my life and get help for my addiction problem for that to happen. As my own mom has passed, I call her mom now since she could be, but she gets upset when I do that. Still, I feel she is my guardian angel that is going to help me get past this rough patch in my life.

p.s. Sorry about the grammar mistakes in this post, I have been drinking a lot, and I will not be able to anymore after tonight. Maybe that will be a good thing, who knows?
Stepping on my soapbox (I can't help it because I care about you).........

You, and only you, can decide that you need to stop drinking. If you are hoping that your girlfriend will motivate you to quit, you are are
destined to fail. Your girlfriend possesses no special power to make you quit. Maybe I misread your post but you need to get sober for yourself LVD. I wish you success and I think that your girlfriend is a special person to take this on with you. Please stay in touch. Sending good vibes your way LVD. You can do this!
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Old 03-22-2012, 09:42 PM
 
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
11,326 posts, read 9,428,564 times
Reputation: 14473
Going either black or white works with some, with others, it doesn't.

I can compare LVD's drinking to my smoking. A year ago, I cut down to smoking only halves, cut my smoking in half. Can't even smoke a whole cigarette anymore!

Lately, I'm on to my next phase, smoking thirds of a cigarette, and sometimes, I just take two puffs, put it out, re-light it at another time, take another couple puffs. And I've been able to measure the improvement in my health as a result of it!

In LVD's case, being I'm not an advocate of either black or white, my recommendation would be to cut down, first, by 25%, over a certain period of time, then 50%, then 75%. And if you merely stay at a 50% or 75% reduction, pat yourself on the back, it's a major achievement!

I had 3 relationships, over the years, with alcoholics, even went to Al-Anon and the treatment center groups, but, in all 3 cases, this black & white mindset, never took hold!

Like weaning yourself away from car dependency, don't quit cold turkey! Take the bus once a week, then twice a week, take it step by step, and within time, you're on a monthly bus pass!

Last edited by tijlover; 03-22-2012 at 09:47 PM.. Reason: edit/add line
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Old 03-22-2012, 09:46 PM
 
8,831 posts, read 4,996,172 times
Reputation: 2329
I don't think alcoholics have the ability to stop so I don't think cutting down is an option. If LVD can get to a doctor there are medications that can help him through alcohol withdrawal.
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Old 03-22-2012, 10:11 PM
 
Location: Home!
8,696 posts, read 6,877,985 times
Reputation: 8436
I understand what you are saying, tijlover, but you must be aware (having dealt with alcoholics and having attended Al-anon)that it is nothing like smoking. The addiction, yes, but the difference is that alcoholics drink to basically numb themselves from life's issues. They didn't wake up one day and claim they were going to drink to become addicted to it. They started out like most other drinkers, they just think they needed it more because the sun rose today, set today, their job sucks, their mate dumped them...you get it. While both addictions have to learn to adapt without the vice, smokers were living life while smoking, drinkers usually have little recollection of living their life. So, they have to basically re-learn how to live again in a sober state. Not to mention the withdrawals and the games their minds play on them. I don't know any true alcoholics who could just cut down. For a while maybe, but it eventually eeks back to the destruction point. A smoker is just more aware of their cutting down whereas a drinker has a few and stops being aware or stops caring as the alcohol takes over their better sense. This is just my take from being around many addicts in all forms. I am sure there are exceptions, as in anything, but I would think they are the extreme minority.

LVD...if you do go, good luck to you! I hope you face your demons and realize that the way things have gone for you have nothing to do with anything other than your addiction. I would guess you could trace all your larger issues to alcohol abuse, at some point. Hopefully, if you have a great support person and get some counseling, you will begin to live life outside the bottle. It's not so bad, really.

BTW, tijlover, I so hope and pray you find your ferret. There have been far too many downer posts here lately. We need some good news!
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Old 03-22-2012, 10:53 PM
 
Location: Orlando, Florida
5,441 posts, read 6,872,119 times
Reputation: 3247
LVD I hope you are able to conquer this alcohol demon, the same way I conquered my drug demons when I was in Vegas

I never mentioned this on the forum, but when my gf and I broke up in August, a lot of my money when to booze and various drugs (coke or ecstasy usually) as my way of dealing with the heartbreak. I was clubbing on the strip 4 of 5 nights week either at Marquee or Surrender and 1 or 2 of those 4 nights I usually joined a girl (sometimes girls) and went with her to her hotel room afterwards.

From August to November most my life was a blur. I was on the strip more than I was at home and my ex had wanted to reconcile our differences, but I was more concerned with my next shot of Patron or my next high and she always called me worrying about me but I always ignored the calls, and eventually she gave up and moved on

Losing my job at the Cosmo was a blessing in disguise in that I was no longer able to afford that party lifestyle. The women, the booze, the drugs all came to an abrupt end when I lost my job.

For the record, I didnt lose my job at the Cosmo because of anything alcohol or drug related.

It was really tough for awhile, and after my father died I really stayed focus to stay away from any illegal vices. Though I still drink, its on occasion, I dont drink to excess like I did at the clubs on the strip

My point is LVD if you're serious about laying the bottle down for good, its ultimately up to you to stay focused and do this for yourself
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Old 03-23-2012, 12:01 AM
 
Location: In my house
8,792 posts, read 14,941,081 times
Reputation: 5393
tijlover, you may want to try those electronic cigarettes. A very good friend of mine uses that and she is extremely satisfied with it. She can now "smoke" right next to me, and it doesn't bother me at all. You still get your shot of nicotine, and can wean off smokes that way as well. You can even get down to no nicotine, and still get your smoking "fix" without anything harmful. Sure beats my old way when I quit...cutting straws down to cigarette size and pretending to smoke them. This was 16 years ago. I quit cold turkey though...most people cannot handle that.

Drinking is a whole new ball game. Coming from a family where my Dad and all four of my brothers have the drinking "gene," quitting is much harder than just cutting down. They either have to really want to quit or it will not work. And having someone give you an ultimatum to quit drinking or else, they will totally resent that person and the relationship will go kaput.
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Old 03-23-2012, 12:13 AM
 
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
11,326 posts, read 9,428,564 times
Reputation: 14473
It's now been over a week since I lost my ferret, and I've all but lost hope, knowing how popular these animals are, and even with a $100 reward, whoever has him isn't going to surrender him, reward or no reward!

I was all set on adopting an older one today, as I saw only 2 ferrets up for adoption at Lied Animal Shelter. When I arrived there, they were already boxed up, in the waiting room, $75 each, sold! I was intending on buying one, and if my other returned, he'd have to painfully adjust to a roommate!

If you do a Search, on Craigs List, for Ferrets, very few, if any, show up, and the ads you do see, they're asking a lot of $$!

I really don't want to get a really young one from Pet Kingdom, I'd prefer an older one, as the younger ones demand a lot of supervision, attention. Being so young and small it's all so easy to step on and injure them. Even my last one, just month ago, crawled under a bedroom carpet (first time) and I stepped on him at night, and I thought I had injured him for life, but he survived.

We shall see!

There was a ton of good business news in the paper today, companies relocating to Nevada, 4 for Las Vegas, so on with the good news!
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Old 03-23-2012, 08:19 AM
 
Location: Las Vegas, NV
2,058 posts, read 2,069,411 times
Reputation: 1646
Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkString View Post
tijlover, you may want to try those electronic cigarettes. A very good friend of mine uses that and she is extremely satisfied with it. She can now "smoke" right next to me, and it doesn't bother me at all. You still get your shot of nicotine, and can wean off smokes that way as well. You can even get down to no nicotine, and still get your smoking "fix" without anything harmful. Sure beats my old way when I quit...cutting straws down to cigarette size and pretending to smoke them. This was 16 years ago. I quit cold turkey though...most people cannot handle that.
You reminded me of this story. I'm sure it's just a freak accident but still really strange.
Electronic cigarette explodes in man's mouth, causes serious injuries - HealthPop - CBS News

"so much for being safer. An electronic cigarette blew up in a Florida man's face, leaving him in a hospital with severe burns, missing his front teeth and a chunk of his tongue."
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Old 03-23-2012, 10:08 AM
 
Location: The Valley of the Sun
4,624 posts, read 2,987,808 times
Reputation: 2968
Quote:
Originally Posted by unf0rgiven6262 View Post
You reminded me of this story. I'm sure it's just a freak accident but still really strange.
Electronic cigarette explodes in man's mouth, causes serious injuries - HealthPop - CBS News

"so much for being safer. An electronic cigarette blew up in a Florida man's face, leaving him in a hospital with severe burns, missing his front teeth and a chunk of his tongue."
I'm not a smoker, but I am leery about those electronic cigarettes. Exactly what is it you are breathing in? They say it's water vapor, but how is the cig constructed? What is creating the water vapor? Is it really something you want in your lungs? Most are made in China, so I don't trust them!
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Old 03-23-2012, 01:42 PM
 
762 posts, read 928,466 times
Reputation: 520
TJLover Can I just say I heart You.
I have wanted to say that for forever.
You are a voice of wisdom in the reality of life.
We have friends with ferrets here in UT maybe we could hook you up.
I will ask. Getting the bugger to you might be hard. I won't be in Vegas for who knows how long. We do have friends using the place in april. can you transport them in a box in a car?



Good news? I'm not pregnant


Today I couldn't move, not to work not to eat not to drink. The depression black hole sucked me up.
My husbands aid said I don't have another client till 4:00 do you want me to just take care of Bill.

It was like a rainbow came into the room! I just could not care for him today. Sometimes we get help just at the second we need it.
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