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A ten minute favor? That's assuming grandma lives within 5 minutes of your home and work.
As for people crying not knowing what to do? Don't kid yourself -- there are plenty of them out there.
Mom and Dad aren't always going to be here. What happens when they've died and you find yourself alone, wondering what might have been if you hadn't squelched a financially secure life elsewhere?
You would have to admit LI NY was pretty good to you and your family.
You would have to admit LI NY was pretty good to you and your family.
Not for my parents. They moved south when Dad retired.
The reality for many of us is that LI's escalating taxes, housing costs, and utilities will make it difficult (if not impossible) for our children to buy here. I wouldn't place any guilt trip on my children when the day comes that they discuss moving elsewhere. It is their lives to live, not mine.
I can't believe that so many posters in this thread are giving the op such a hard time. Why would any person emigrate in order to improve their living conditions?!!! In fact, fossil records show that humans originated on Long Island.
It seems that i am the only person on this board who cares about family values. Whenever I ask any questions, the first thing people suggest is relocating. That would put me away from my entire family (which lives on Long Island), and not something I would want to do unless I had exhausted all other options. Yet people here seem to think that relocating and abandoning your family is a completely trivial decision. If you absolutely cannot survive on Long Island no matter what sacrifices you make, then maybe you need to relocate and abandon your family, but it should be the absolute hardest decision you have ever made, and not a completely trivial decision.
I take offense to you're the only person who has family values. Your family is your wife and kids. Your parents and your wife's parents are relatives. You really have to take care of yourself, wife and kids when you have them. It seems that you are having a hard time living on Long Island. So move as most people tell you. We lived on Long Island for most of our lives and when the taxes became ridiculous we decided it was time to move. We landed in Ohio and couldn't be happier. We wish we did it sooner.
You seem so melodramatic with the "abandoning your family". As another poster said "man up" and do what's best for yourself and forget the crap about a built-in baby-sitter. Maybe your parents are sick of baby-sitting all the time, but are afraid of telling you. You're in you mid 30's grow up.
I still remember the day I packed all of my belongings into a rented Buick Century and waved goodbye to my parents in the window. I was 26 and finally moved out of my parents home to follow my girlfriend (now wife) to grad school in Michigan. If there's one thing my folks taught me was to follow my dreams and be my own man. I knew that I was eventually going to marry the girl I followed 650 miles from home.
When she finished school, we moved back to Manhattan (still following those dreams) to live in the city and be closer to our families. During that time, my dad and my older brother passed away, 2 years apart. I was glad that we were there during that time to be close to my loved ones. During that time in the city, I can count the number of times that any of my family came to visit and stay with us at our apartment (we had plenty of room). I'm not bitter or anything, having grown up on LI I know that Manhattan may as well be another planet for some island natives.
After 7 years of living downtown, we decided that we wanted to start a family and it wasn't happening in NYC. So, faced with the prospect of buying a home on the island and commuting x amount of hours a day to our jobs in NY, we decided to leave the area again. We have been in our current location for some time now, and during that time we've had 2 awesome kids. When my kids are grown, they can decide if they want to stay here and they'll be able to do so comfortably shoud they choose. Who knows, maybe we will abandon them and move somewhere else for retirement lol. I always wanted to live on the West coast. We just purchased a second home for my in-laws to live in 7 miles away and they moved down here at the end of last year. Life is good and I am happy that I have made my decisions on my own with my family's support. They made me the man I am today.
I can't believe that so many posters in this thread are giving the op such a hard time. Why would any person emigrate in order to improve their living conditions?!!! In fact, fossil records show that humans originated on Long Island.
People feel independence is the pinnacle of being a grown up. It is only one facet of it and people are in love with the achievement or something. Lots of kids are thrown out at 18 and lots leave at 18 (or close). Meanwhile plenty of us on the other side do perfectly fine with and without them while having them to fall back on whenever we want. Family has helped us in so many ways over the years, AND vice versa. There wasn't a "don't leave us" speech when we were 18 - we were taught to be tight from the beginning. I don't see how I'm worse off for it, seeing so many comments about "growing up". Elitist much?
People feel independence is the pinnacle of being a grown up. It is only one facet of it and people are in love with the achievement or something. Lots of kids are thrown out at 18 and lots leave at 18 (or close). Meanwhile plenty of us on the other side do perfectly fine with and without them while having them to fall back on whenever we want. Family has helped us in so many ways over the years, AND vice versa. There wasn't a "don't leave us" speech when we were 18 - we were taught to be tight from the beginning. I don't see how I'm worse off for it, seeing so many comments about "growing up". Elitist much?
You are making a circular argument. No one really is judging those who want to remain tight. Most feel it's great if you can manage it. Remember the OP lambasted people throughout the thread as abandoners and deserters and that is why the pendulum swung so far in the negative direction. I like the way you phrase it. Keeping family "tight" is admirable to me and if some financial sacrifices are made for that, in many ways it's absolutely worth it. It's a tough discussion because people without that tight family bond (mine is so-so, lots of distance and declining numbers) do not have the same perspective on it, however they have enough "values" to be insulted when called names or are slandered as somehow not caring.
This whole thread is way off the rails and has been from the start. The OP took systemic financial and economic problems on LI and spun them into a mis-defined "family values" issue. It's not a values issue at all. It's that he can't afford to live where he wants.
Status:
"Let this year be over..."
(set 19 days ago)
Location: Where my bills arrive
19,219 posts, read 17,085,392 times
Reputation: 15538
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pito_Chueco
I can't believe that so many posters in this thread are giving the op such a hard time. Why would any person emigrate in order to improve their living conditions?!!! In fact, fossil records show that humans originated on Long Island.
I am sure that point of origin is somewhere under the LIE ......
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