Moving back to Long Island from NC (Babylon, Levittown: home equity loan, attorney)

[I'minformed2]

what a crock......that's really all I can say. The above poster is piling on like I can't believe. I can tell you one negative stereotype that is true about Long Islander's....the world revolves around them. None of the problems they face exist ANYWHERE else and can all only be blamed on living in NY....they are such troopers for having to put up with it. We should give them all a round of aplaus as they move to other areas and turn them into another LI.

[stmaarten]

Originally Posted by jj_nycguy

Wow, a $20k difference from NYC to LI. I'm a Project Manager in NYC and the exact same job on LI pays $100k less that I make. Even with my salary, it is a constant battle to make ends meet and the 3hrs + commute can wear you out. I've been commuting for over 15 years and there is no way to survive on a LI salary unless you leave paycheck to paycheck & charge everything else. LI is not a place for anyone who wants to have any quality of life. LI is designed for making as much as possible and leaving when a good opportunity arises. If you stay long enough; the 15hrs + days, stress of losing your job on a daily basis and threat of losing everything you worked hard for in less than six months (if unemployed); eventually you'll wind up in the hospital with heart problems, like everyone else my age. We're all on heart meds and most of my friends have already had their second heart attack and it's a matter of time before the third. Those of us that are healthy have left LI and went south where the stress levels are almost non-existent (compared to NY).
Well... sorry for venting but when I see people who wish they lived in the NY metro area, I know that they don't have any idea what it really means to live and raise a family here. Unless you make $200k or more, it's a constant battle to make ends meet... forgot about living in Queens or Brooklyn, which is even more expensive. $1.5M for a small 3bd ranch is not feasible for anyone trying to start a family. Even out east, in the country, the homes are enormous, expensive with taxes exceeding $15k/yr. UGH!

My scenario is not living an exotic life. My very simple 4bd home is $800k with $15k/yr in taxes (yearly increases of $2k). It is not large and it sits on a 60x100 lot. The $4000/mo mortgage, $500/mo on car insurance, $200/mo electric & $300/mo oil deliveries make it very difficult to survive. The people you see driving Escalades and Navigators are usually two income families, with a combined salary of $350-500k. Yes, there are plenty of wealthy on LI. Don't let the cars fool you, these wealthy people who have cleaning services who clean the inside of their homes, servers for running their parties, lawn crews to make their property look great and a pool service for their inground luxury pool with attached hot tub. This is not the average LI lifestyle.

Exactly right! I only wish we had moved to North Carolina sooner! Since moving here, my husband's stress-level has improved 100%. All of our lives have improved tremendously. We have more time for our children, we spend more time having fun outdoors and enjoying the incredible weather. Our cost of living has decreased by about 1/3. We're not worried about whether or not the taxes are going to increase yet again by $2000.
People are VERY friendly here in NC. I actually had to get used to the fact that people are constantly waving at complete strangers. At first I thought people were mistaking me for someone they actually knew. Groceries are more expensive, true, but we're not paying $14,000 in property taxes either! The schools are actually more challenging than the ones my children attended in NJ and those were supposed to be "blue ribbon" schools. (Yes, that came as a shock to me as well!)
The ONLY regret I have is leaving my extended family behind.
To each his own. I find it appalling that people are actually being ridiculed and judged for making a life change for the better. Hey, if it didn't work out for you, that's unfortunate. That's what life is all about, learning lessons...

[Chella]

Are you looking to move back there or further west?

[jj_nycguy]

Originally Posted by i'minformed

what a crock......that's really all I can say. The above poster is piling on like I can't believe. I can tell you one negative stereotype that is true about Long Islander's....the world revolves around them. None of the problems they face exist ANYWHERE else and can all only be blamed on living in NY....they are such troopers for having to put up with it. We should give them all a round of aplaus as they move to other areas and turn them into another LI.

Actually, the world does not revolve around NY. I've posted a very accurate view of living on LI. After 10yrs + of living off of credit cards just to pay for food... LI is tough. You can survive here, but it requires a lot of work and it wears you down. I'm not saying it's easy elsewhere... don't get me wrong. The positive side is the large number of jobs available, but there are a lot of people interviewing for them. I'm sure there are other cities where there aren't enough jobs.

My point was to paint a real picture for those who watch TV and think NY/LI is a paradise place, we're all loaded and we all have a blast living extravagant lifestyles. If you want that, move to Southern Florida or California. NY is about extremely long hours at work, long commutes and little to no family time. The benefit is a large salary. If you're smart you work with brokers and try to make the little extra you have grow into something... then retire down south and live a more relaxed life.

One last "I Love NY piece"... did you know that if your parents earn more than $150k (combined) then your kid may not be eligible for a student loan? Welcome to NY... where everyone takes a second and/or third mortgage to pay for their child's education because they cannot get a loan. Two kids going to college for four years at $15k/yr = $120k. No home equity in your home... no problem, no college for your kids. Everything on LI is like this - everything is a project.

I may sound cynical, but this is what happens when you live on LI for over 45 years and realize you don't have much more than when you first started out, excluding a home and two used cars. The friends I know who have moved far away from LI now own timeshares, summer homes, boats, lots of traveling and their wifes are adorned with jewelry. They can actually buy luxury items for their families so they can live a better life... something most LI'ers cannot do. Our hopes are to be able to pay the bills.

[NYer]

Originally Posted by jj_nycguy

...The friends I know who have moved far away from LI now own timeshares, summer homes, boats, lots of traveling and their wifes are adorned with jewelry. They can actually buy luxury items for their families so they can live a better life... something most LI'ers cannot do. Our hopes are to be able to pay the bills.

We moved to a place (NC) where we have a great home & lots more free time, and, although you can find people with fancy stuff it is not as much of a big deal here.
My hubby used to get me jewelry for mother's day, this year I asked for jasmine plants. That's what I truly wanted.
Even though he could have bought me better jewelry than last year, being here I see I have enough. What a relief, to have stepped away from that rat race.

[pjandamom]

If people feel as if they have to "KEEP UP WITH THE JONESES" that sounds as if thats THEIR problem and no one elses. Where do these people live?!?! I live on LI too and have never felt this.

[threesons]

Originally Posted by pjandamom

If people feel as if they have to "KEEP UP WITH THE JONESES" that sounds as if thats THEIR problem and no one elses. Where do these people live?!?! I live on LI too and have never felt this.

It is funny you say that, because I often ask myself if it is me that has the hang up of trying to keep up. But there is a certain feeling of insecurity when the people you are hanging with are all consumed with $$ and flashy things & that is all they talk about. Same thing when you are hanging with 40-50 year old women that are obsessed with boob jobs, tummy tucks, botox. I live in the North Shore (Nassau) and this is all I hear. Yes I have fun, Yes I like my friends, but it gets old.

[dreamofmonterey]

Originally Posted by stmaarten

Exactly right! I only wish we had moved to North Carolina sooner! Since moving here, my husband's stress-level has improved 100%. All of our lives have improved tremendously. We have more time for our children, we spend more time having fun outdoors and enjoying the incredible weather. Our cost of living has decreased by about 1/3. We're not worried about whether or not the taxes are going to increase yet again by $2000.
People are VERY friendly here in NC. I actually had to get used to the fact that people are constantly waving at complete strangers. At first I thought people were mistaking me for someone they actually knew. Groceries are more expensive, true, but we're not paying $14,000 in property taxes either! The schools are actually more challenging than the ones my children attended in NJ and those were supposed to be "blue ribbon" schools. (Yes, that came as a shock to me as well!)
The ONLY regret I have is leaving my extended family behind.
To each his own. I find it appalling that people are actually being ridiculed and judged for making a life change for the better. Hey, if it didn't work out for you, that's unfortunate. That's what life is all about, learning lessons...

Yes- the property taxes are better. I know many people who stay on LI as it is familiar. I lived there over 33 years and it is all about keeping up with the Joneses- They complain about heat bills, traffic, car insurance, etc. It is hardly a glamorous lifestyle- My friend has a 900k mortgage with a front yard the size of my driveway. They struggle and have to have the new Mercedes- etc. It is tiresome. I am glad to be out. Life is too short.

[GCGuy]

Life is to short, that's why I don't want to chase the next hot area that's only hot b/c it's cheap.

[jj_nycguy]

It's interesting that you mention this. I know several people who do just that... always looking to have the newest and best, but they also earn more than double my salary. In a way I can understand, though... all of these people struggled like the rest of us but something good happens; better job or inheritance; and they go spend-crazy. A very good friend, who used to borrow money just to pay his bills and avoid foreclosure... now his business makes over $700k/yr and he spends most of it on luxuries. I'm not justifying it, but when you have nothing for many decades and suddenly you're in your 50s with a very large income, I can understand the need to buy lots of things (one extreme to the other).

As for me, I'm far too cheap and could care less what others have or do. I came from an very poor family; no money for gifts, just enough to pay bills and have dinner each night. I don't want my family to live like that, it was awful.