Should I move to Az or stay in Long Island (Lindenhurst: crime, mortgage)

[rammie]

Hi everyone, Im new to this forum and wonder if you can give me advise. Im a single stay at home mom living off child support and a tenant the past 10 yrs. I recently sold my house and took a loss on it. I am currently living at my boyfriends house but we are on the verge of breaking up. I have 2 boys ages 10 and 7. Im tired of living in Lindenhurst and I cant afford the areas in LI where I want to move. I have a older brother who lives in Prescott, Az and his family lives in Peoria, AZ. They have wanted me to move there for yrs but Im scared that I wont be able to afford there either. I currently get 2100 a month so I would have to base my expenses in AZ on that in case I dont get a job. I know I cant afford LI by myself. If anyone has moved like this before, any advise would be appreciated. Thanks in advance for your help.

[hotkarl]

If you don't mind your kids getting hooked on meth, then move.
Meth is mandatory out there. It's like a right of passage or something.

Seriously though, AZ has some financial benefits, hell, almost anywhere else in the country does, but it is not the promised land. And like anything else, it's all relative. You would have to be in a position to buy a home with little or no mortgage in order for it to be worth the hassle. Expenses are a little cheaper there than here but so are wages. It is hot. Real hot.
I have about a half dozen friends and family that moved out there over the past few years and were/are absolutely miserable. The ones that could afford it, came back here or moved elsewhere. The ones that spent every last penny making the move and buying a fancy house that they can't sell for what they paid for it are stuck there and totally miserable.

Just do research. Lots of it. Especially having children in the mix.

[newtoli]

You'd probably fare better moneywise in AZ, plus you'd have family to help you. BUT - have you ever even visited AZ? I'm not a big fan, it's pretty boring and bland.

Since your kids are 7 and 10, they must be in school, correct? Pick up a part time job to supplement your child support and you should be in good shape. In fact, if you want to stay on LI, why haven't you done that already?

What about visitation with the father? Can you move to AZ legally?

[S.I.B.]

Originally Posted by newtoli

What about visitation with the father? Can you move to AZ legally?

this is my question as well. there was an article in the papers a few years ago where, if I'm not mistaken, the courts essentially forbade a mother from moving across the country with her new husband because the father was located here in NY.

[dman72]

With 2100 a month almost anywhere is better than here, although personally I'd never move to AZ. There are other affordable place in the US that aren't crime filled deserts.

[newtoli]

Originally Posted by S.I.B.

this is my question as well. there was an article in the papers a few years ago where, if I'm not mistaken, the courts essentially forbade a mother from moving across the country with her new husband because the father was located here in NY.

Yes, usually you need consent from the other parent to move out of State.

[lialleycat]

I have friends in AZ that love it, but she had some sort of condition that was really helped by the low humidity. If you have 2100 a month that you can take anywhere in the country, start looking at places off LI to see if they have the right mix for you. I've had family move all over and most love where they are at now and wouldn't come back to LI.

What do you do for a living? Perhaps find a few places that look promising, then apply for jobs in all the areas. Move to whichever you get the best offer from.

Try this quiz to get information on areas you might not have originally thought of - www. find your spot . com (without spaces. for some reason it thinks it's a curse word without the spaces! Ugh)

[seain dublin]

The mother of a 7 and a 10 yr old can also get a job outside the home. They are in school a good part of the day.

[rammie]

Just to answer a few of your questions. I used to work for america west airlines which phx was their hub. I have many friends that still live there. I traveled to many parts of the country and the world and I have lived in ohio and colorado. I loved colorado and hated ohio but I want some place a little warmer. My ex husband doesnt mind me going since he his kids annoy him and doesnt think we should have had them plus he has a very bad temper. We would go to our lawyer just to sign things off legally so that issue is not a problem. I was raised the old fashioned way where the mom would stay home until the kids were old enough to be left alone so thats what Im trying to do and it worked up until now. I want to go back to the airlines so bad but even my friends say its hard if I dont have any babysitters and why would I work for 10 bucks an hr, only to pay a babysitter...also I need the summer and vacation time off with the boys since I have no one to help me, thats how its been so far. I hope I anwsered some of your questions. Thanks for all your help so far and keep those ideas coming...

[Jetties]

I think you might want to reconsider a different angle than the 'old fashioned' way you were brought up. Your kids are young and currently live with you and your boyfriend, a situation you say may be temporary. I would think getting a stable environment for you and your kids shuld be the first priority (wherever that might be). There is no reason you cant work some type of job to give you more options.