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Old 05-12-2010, 07:12 PM
 
Location: Bella Vista, Ark
47,410 posts, read 37,441,264 times
Reputation: 19544
Quote:
Originally Posted by williamj67 View Post
Charles, I remember growing up in So.Ca , if you had a problem with somebody or didn't like somebody, you told them you don't like them or maybe you just wouldn't talk to them and it is the same way in NY. Basically you knew who your friends were and who wern't your friends, here in the south everyone acts all nice and friendly to you like they are your friend and then you find out later they are going around talking crap about you, then you confront them on it and it "oh no I would never say anything bad about you, why would you think such a thing, oh lord". That is what I mean by southern fakeness, you might have to experience it before you fully comprehend it. I want people to tell me that they have a problem with me because I can either change or tell them to f___-off, it's very simple. lol. I have a bigger support network in Ca than I do in Nc but an even bigger one in Ny. Even if I can't surf (which I think one day I will again) I can still enjoy the SoCa beach scene. I used to think the same thing about Nc with all of the out of staters moving here that they would be open minded and educated but it seems like alot (not all) change into some type of hy-brid southern-northern something....lol
but as pointed out, can you handle the cost of living there? What does your wife do for a living, you have said you are on disability which of course means you are not allowed to work or are only allowed to make a very small amount of money. I have lived in Ca, Texas and a few other places, the south isn't any more fake than many places (well maybe a little)

Nita
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Old 05-12-2010, 07:39 PM
 
80 posts, read 154,069 times
Reputation: 68
Thanks for replying Nita, yes I do have my heart set on Ca because that is where I'm from. So if 30 million people live there, than there is room for 30million + 4. I am on short term disability right now and it will take some time but eventually I will be on long term. I know what it costs to live there and we'll be ok with it. I too have lived around the country and have experienced first hand what "southern hospitality" is, I don't need any more of it.....lol. I sincerly thank everyone for their insights and perspectives, if it is meant to be it will happen. Thanks.....
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Old 05-12-2010, 07:42 PM
 
1,465 posts, read 2,557,104 times
Reputation: 783
William, I look forward to your arrival to California.
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Old 05-12-2010, 09:56 PM
 
Location: Monterey County, CA
3,619 posts, read 6,464,680 times
Reputation: 3097
William, I moved with my family (my wife + 3 kiddos) from SoCal (South Bay) to Colorado. We really enjoyed the Rocky Mountain state and waht it had to offer. But something was missing. It started out kind of small, then grew like a big storm. I missed so much about the West Coast - the ocean, the culture, the beach lifestyle, the variety of good autentic foods, the weather, etc... And yes, the honesty of the ppl. You pretty much new where you stood. Ppl in LA are normally pretty straight forward. In CO their is a veneer of politeness I think similar to the south where most everyone appears to be friendly on the surface. Its a culturally accpeted norm. But then you never really know where you stand.

Anway we moved back to CA to the Central Coast and are loving it up here in Monterey.





But we still visit LA and enjoy the beach scene along with friends there as well. We'll be going down south in a few days to go to a family wedding and hang at the beach.





Certain parts of Long Beach or the South Bay are both nice places to land in LA.

For your wife I would just try and work with her. You did go live for many years on the East Coast and now the south. So why not at least give SoCal a chance. Ask her to give it chance. Your mother-in-law is a different story. My mom followed us to Colorado and followed us returning to CA. Grandparents want to be with their grandkids - bottom line. So do anything you can to help her sell the house. It doesn't sound like you will leave her behind.

Derek
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Old 05-13-2010, 06:16 PM
 
2,374 posts, read 2,476,048 times
Reputation: 1738
Awesome pics.
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Old 05-14-2010, 12:29 PM
 
80 posts, read 154,069 times
Reputation: 68
Thanks Mtnsurfer, I have read your posts in the past many times, I usually just read the posts with-out replying. I actually had researched Monterey a little bit because of one of your posts and it seemed much more affordable than So.Ca. I like how you use the word veneer because that is exactly what it is and even some of the folks that aren't from here seem to adopt that quality. It is my wife's family that causes her to not want to go, she feels it is to far from them, at times I feel it is not far enough!!! My mother in law may not have a choice in the matter because of her age and the fact that she isn't married so we are the one's who are going to have to look after her. I know I'm rambling but I'm a scatter brain right now with everything going on.
I have always liked the central coast, my friends dad used to live in Morro Bay and we used to go up there sometimes. I've also been through Santa Cruz and areas up there, very beautiful. Those pictures you posted are stunning,,,,,,,Thanks for the support.
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Old 05-14-2010, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Bella Vista, Ark
47,410 posts, read 37,441,264 times
Reputation: 19544
Quote:
Originally Posted by williamj67 View Post
Thanks Mtnsurfer, I have read your posts in the past many times, I usually just read the posts with-out replying. I actually had researched Monterey a little bit because of one of your posts and it seemed much more affordable than So.Ca. I like how you use the word veneer because that is exactly what it is and even some of the folks that aren't from here seem to adopt that quality. It is my wife's family that causes her to not want to go, she feels it is to far from them, at times I feel it is not far enough!!! My mother in law may not have a choice in the matter because of her age and the fact that she isn't married so we are the one's who are going to have to look after her. I know I'm rambling but I'm a scatter brain right now with everything going on.
I have always liked the central coast, my friends dad used to live in Morro Bay and we used to go up there sometimes. I've also been through Santa Cruz and areas up there, very beautiful. Those pictures you posted are stunning,,,,,,,Thanks for the support.
William, I for one love the Monterey and Morro Bay area, but again, you have to keep in perspective the wishes of your wife and the cost of living as long as you will be trying to live pretty much on disability.

I wish you good luck, sounds like you will need it. You seem to be bound and determined, against all odds to re-locate back to Ca and your wife and family seem to be dead set against it.

Nita
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Old 05-15-2010, 08:31 AM
 
Location: Malibu/Miami Beach
1,062 posts, read 1,991,328 times
Reputation: 405
I guess you already know of this but if not take a look.
Home - www.jessebillauer.com


This guy really made me stop and think.
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Old 05-15-2010, 12:37 PM
 
Location: California
24,557 posts, read 14,909,050 times
Reputation: 16531
Consider waiting until your kids are out of school and spend the next few years vacationing in CA with your wife. Part of her hesitation may be uprooting the kids from close family and changing schools, both of which are valid issues. i seen enough problem children to know that if something (or some place) is working well for them DON'T CHANGE IT for no good reason. And you just wanting to come back to CA is not a good enough reason IMO.
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