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Old 09-26-2010, 09:36 AM
 
20 posts, read 41,155 times
Reputation: 15
Default How to meet people/make friends in Louisville

Hi,

I moved here about six months ago and have yet to really make any friends. I'm a 31 yr old single female with no kids who works from home. Sometimes it feel like I am surrounded by families or people who have been friends all their lives. Also, I don't really feel like I fit in with the "single scene" as I don't like bars and clubs that much (especially alone!). I think the combo of working from home, and being well past "college age" is making things even more tricky.

I have tried Meetup.com but so far found it to be dominated by couples or close-knit group. What is the best way to just make some good single friends so I have some people to go out to dinner with, go on trips, etc. It seems like Louisville has a reasonable amount of things to do, but it gets boring doing everything alone.

Thanks!

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Old 09-26-2010, 10:15 AM
 
1,589 posts, read 1,399,127 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rachelallison View Post
Hi,

I moved here about six months ago and have yet to really make any friends. I'm a 31 yr old single female with no kids who works from home. Sometimes it feel like I am surrounded by families or people who have been friends all their lives. Also, I don't really feel like I fit in with the "single scene" as I don't like bars and clubs that much (especially alone!). I think the combo of working from home, and being well past "college age" is making things even more tricky.

I have tried Meetup.com but so far found it to be dominated by couples or close-knit group. What is the best way to just make some good single friends so I have some people to go out to dinner with, go on trips, etc. It seems like Louisville has a reasonable amount of things to do, but it gets boring doing everything alone.

Thanks!
Do you have a church you belong to~? Many churches here have events and you can meet people there. If your not a church goer, there is so many local events to attend that you can meet folks there. Check the CJ on Friday and you will see all the events we have to offer.
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Old 09-26-2010, 11:31 AM
 
Location: Louisville, KY
44 posts, read 76,417 times
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I am 32 and have lived here my whole life, but some of my friends have moved away over the years, or are in different places in their lives, so I have enjoyed making some new friends as well.

I was going to mention church as well, but I figured you would have mentioned that if you were a church goer. I attend a small church, but do activities at larger churches sometimes and it's a great way to meet people. For instance, I occasionally take exercise classes at Southeast Christian. They are only $2 a class, and I've met several people this way. I wouldn't say that these are close friends, but we always chat before and after class, and they notice if I haven't been there for awhile, which is nice. Plus, you never know who'd you meet!

A few years ago I joined a networking group. I initially did this to meet people to boost my career, but found that I have also met a lot of nice people.

I have to admit I've also met a lot of people due to going to kid friendly activities, but I think you could also achieve this by finding small groups that are linked with a hobby. Do you knit or like to write or like to read? I joined a book club into a group of total strangers (many of whom knew each other) a few years ago, and now consider them to be a group of friends.

I've also taken (and taught) several continuing education (sometimes called adult education) classes over the years. They are not all academic- you can take anything from art, to dance/excercise classes, to ghost hunting! The groups are usually small, and I'd said typically half of the class are also people coming alone, so it's not just groups of exsisting friends. Here are some links for cont. ed:

JCPS Lifelong Learning Program - Jefferson Co. Public School's Adult Ed

https://louisville.edu/lifelonglearning/ - U of L's Lifelong Learning

Oldham County Schools Arts Center - Oldham County Arts Center class schedule

I'm sure there are more of these groups than I've listed here, but these hopefully will get your wheels turning! I think this whole process will need to take patience and a little trial and error. There have been groups/activities I've been part of where I leave feeling discouraged and like everyone was rude, and then some that were completely the opposite.

Lately I've noticed people in the same boat (having moved into Louisville) putting ads under the "strictly platonic" section on Craigslist. You have to wade through the not so platonic ads to find the appropriate ones, but that may be something to try as well. I don't have any experience with trying the Craigslist route, but I did see recently that someone was trying to plan a potluck type of gathering at a public park for people who are new to Louisville or just want to make new friends, so that sounded nice. : )

I hope this helps!
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Old 09-26-2010, 01:20 PM
 
Location: Louisville, KY
522 posts, read 960,727 times
Reputation: 216
Quote:
Originally Posted by rachelallison View Post
Hi,

I moved here about six months ago and have yet to really make any friends. I'm a 31 yr old single female with no kids who works from home. Sometimes it feel like I am surrounded by families or people who have been friends all their lives. Also, I don't really feel like I fit in with the "single scene" as I don't like bars and clubs that much (especially alone!). I think the combo of working from home, and being well past "college age" is making things even more tricky.

I have tried Meetup.com but so far found it to be dominated by couples or close-knit group. What is the best way to just make some good single friends so I have some people to go out to dinner with, go on trips, etc. It seems like Louisville has a reasonable amount of things to do, but it gets boring doing everything alone.

Thanks!
I have had the same problem - due to health issues I have not been able to really continue looking for work lately so when these are taken care of am hoping outside the home employment will help. Louisville is not a good place for an older single person - it's very hard to make friends because it's family oriented and people generally have their friendships established and are not really LOOKING to make friends. It requires alot of effort on the new person's part and if you're used to living in places that have more single people or maybe perhaps more transient, you are not used to it being that difficult. If you are a church goer that might help. But if you are on the shy side and don't like going and doing things alone, it's very tough. Plus winter is coming so fewer people will be inclined to be out and about. I think the previous poster has some good suggestions. Point being, you have to put yourself out there and join SOMETHING and when you aren't used to being a joiner that is hard. But I think it's either that, live a lonely life, or move somewhere else. Good luck to you!
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Old 09-26-2010, 02:45 PM
 
1,589 posts, read 1,399,127 times
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I forgot about a gym, that is if you excerise. I've met many people there. Once a month, they have activities for singles. Also, there is a hiking club in Louisville and a couple of walking clubs....and even an excerise club at the parks I've heard about. Just some more suggestions.
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Old 09-27-2010, 01:24 PM
 
20 posts, read 41,155 times
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Hi, Thank you all for the responses. I moved here from Phoenix which was certainly more transient. Overall I am loving KY, and especially Louisville, just this one issue has been a rough transition.

I am Episcopalian, but not a big church-goer. I have visited some different churches since arriving, but most of the groups seemed geared for those much younger/with kids/or much older. (I realize I'm sort of an odd-fit in KY to be in my 30s and unwed/without kids). I may check the exercise classes though as that could be fun.

Queen-I had not thought of 'adult ed' but some of those courses look quite interesting and that could be a great way to get out of the house if nothing else.

Veggie-I'll look into the hiking/fitness clubs as both sound like the could be interesting as well

Again thanks you all for your suggestions and I suppose I'll just try to get out more and see how it goes.
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Old 10-02-2010, 05:04 PM
 
3,759 posts, read 7,670,887 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rachelallison View Post
Hi, Thank you all for the responses. I moved here from Phoenix which was certainly more transient. Overall I am loving KY, and especially Louisville, just this one issue has been a rough transition.

I am Episcopalian, but not a big church-goer. I have visited some different churches since arriving, but most of the groups seemed geared for those much younger/with kids/or much older. (I realize I'm sort of an odd-fit in KY to be in my 30s and unwed/without kids). I may check the exercise classes though as that could be fun.

Queen-I had not thought of 'adult ed' but some of those courses look quite interesting and that could be a great way to get out of the house if nothing else.

Veggie-I'll look into the hiking/fitness clubs as both sound like the could be interesting as well

Again thanks you all for your suggestions and I suppose I'll just try to get out more and see how it goes.
I feel your pain, but you cant really blame the city....you would have the same problem in almost any city. Working from home, not liking bars....where else do you meet people unless you go out of your way to strike up conversation?

I do agree joining groups is the best way. Then you meet a group, and then they have friends, and you network that way. Church groups are one idea but there are really groups for anything. Sojourn in Germantown/Smoketown is one church that is more hip and art oriented for people under 40.


I also enjoy the Fat Friday and First Friday Trolley hops:
First Friday Trolley Hop (http://www.ldmd.org/trolleyhop/ - broken link)
F.A.T. Friday Hop

Use sites like www.leoweekly.com, www.metromix.com, www.brokensidewalk.com, www.backseatsandbar.com, and www.consuminglouisville.com.

Louisville is probably one of the top 20 cities for restaurants and this website is one of the reasons:

Commentary | LouisvilleHotBytes.com. The free forum there has great foodie advice and the group meets up often. There's lots of couples but also some singles.

Finally, you may consider dating or social networkingsites. Free Online Dating at Plentyoffish.com™ is a free one. Match and Eharmony are two of the leading ones as well. You can go on there just to meet friends, keep it platonic, and use it as a way to find someone who may have other friends who you could do things with. Especially now with the internet, there is no excuse for anyone to be lonely especially in a top 50 metro area with over 1 million people.

There's tons going on every day, but you just have to get out and do it:
For example, you missed a huge gathering today in Old Louisille: The St James Court Art show is one of the largest in the nation and is top rated by Sunshine Artist Magazine.

Finally, I will give you the same advice I gave someone else. Get out, and go do something, even if it is alone at first. Go to the first coffee shop you find on Bardstown Road, pick up magazines, and brochures, and promise yourself you will strike up conversation with the first man (or woman) that catches your eye. Honestly, what's the worst that could happen? SO maybe one or two people are rude, but then you could meet a best friend or even a lover for life.
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Old 12-17-2010, 03:48 AM
 
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I agree - the best routes for me were joining the gym, although it is much slower, but works, using forums and the friends sites that are out there - such as www.drinkingpartners.com or meet up.com etc. If you have a spare room maybe advertise for a flat/house mate - another great way to meet. Guaranteed in big towns and cities there will be 1000's of people in the same situation - you'll find your life will change instantly when you meet people on your wavelength - so keep trying these routes until this happens - good luck!
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Old 12-21-2010, 10:26 AM
 
81 posts, read 101,672 times
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Louisville can be a bit difficult socially for new residents since many folks who live in the Ville grew up here and maintain friends from high school and college. It is a city that is not used to transient populations and Louisville tends towards insularity. It is even harder when you're older and retired like myself. I plan on joining every possible organization and taking a myriad of adult classes. I also realize that I need to break out of familiar molds and do things that could be uncomfortable for me. Just take it slow and lower any high expectations. Things will get better with time.
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Old 12-21-2010, 02:11 PM
 
Location: Louisville, KY
522 posts, read 960,727 times
Reputation: 216
Quote:
Originally Posted by enofile View Post
Louisville can be a bit difficult socially for new residents since many folks who live in the Ville grew up here and maintain friends from high school and college. It is a city that is not used to transient populations and Louisville tends towards insularity. It is even harder when you're older and retired like myself. I plan on joining every possible organization and taking a myriad of adult classes. I also realize that I need to break out of familiar molds and do things that could be uncomfortable for me. Just take it slow and lower any high expectations. Things will get better with time.
Good for you. I plan on going back to Florida. It's 80 degrees there today and people are not insular at all. I made a big mistake to move here, but not one i can't or won't correct.
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