Deep Thoughts (refrigerator, live in, dryer)

[forest beekeeper]

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

There's no future in time travel

This is more intense than a pit bull on crack!

[Eastport4me]

A succesful man makes more money than his woman can spend.
A succesful woman is one who can find such a man.

Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and keep away from children.

Looks capture the eyes.
Personality captures the heart.

[forest beekeeper]

Tighten until it cracks, back off 1/2 turn

Time for another tea party; at Washington this time!

To err is human. To moo, bovine

[forest beekeeper]

To make a long story short, don't tell it.


To prevent splatter, cover dish before micro waving cat


Tyrants and Bureaucrats prefer unarmed peasants

[forest beekeeper]

Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted!

Vegetarians eat vegetables; beware of humanitarians

Very funny Scotty now beam down my clothes!!

[forest beekeeper]

Warning: Virus detected, Formatting Hard Drive!

We all live in a yellow subroutine

We cannot change the direction of the wind... but we can adjust our sails.

[quiet walker]

How many zeros in a billion?

This is too true to be funny.

The next time you hear a politician use the
word 'billion' in a casual manner, think about
whether you want the 'politicians' spending
YOUR tax money.

A billion is a difficult number to comprehend,
but one advertising agency did a good job of
putting that figure into some perspective in
one of it's releases.


A.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959.

B.
A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.

C.
A billion hours ago our ancestors were
living in the Stone Age.

D.
A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.

E.
A billion dollars ago was only
8 hours and 20 minutes,
at the rate our government
is spending it.

While this thought is still fresh in our brain...
let's take a look at New Orleans ....
It's amazing what you can learn with some simple division.


Louisiana Senator,
Mary Landrieu (D)
is presently asking Congress for
250 BILLION DOLLARS
to rebuild New Orleans . Interesting number...
what does it mean?

A.
Well... if you are one of the 484,674 residents of New Orleans
(every man, woman, and child)
you each get $516,528.

B.
Or... if you have one of the 188,251 homes in
New Orleans , your home gets $1,329,787.

C.
Or... if you are a family of four...
your family gets $2,066,012.

Washington , D. C

< HELLO! >
Are all your calculators broken??

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL License Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Federal Income Tax < BR>Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax)
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Tax
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road Usage Tax (Truckers)
Sales Taxes
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Fe deral, State and Local Surcharge Tax
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Tax
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago...
and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.

We had absolutely no national debt...
We had the largest middle class in the world...
and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

What happened?
Can you spell 'politicians!'

And I still have to
press "1"
for English.

I hope this goes around the
USA
at least 100 times

What the heck happened?????

[forest beekeeper]

Originally Posted by quiet walker

... Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago...
and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.

We had absolutely no national debt...
We had the largest middle class in the world...
and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

What happened?
Can you spell 'politicians!'

We also had no drug laws.

Anyone could purchase any drug, with no doctor middle man.

[RANGER.101ST]

vegetarian is an indian word for poor hunter.

[Shuffler]

"Vegetables: What Food Eats"