Retiring to a small town vs. a rural setting (Hope: houses, neighborhood)

[Two Nice Guys]

As we look online at places suited to our retirement plans, we find that we are drawn to either houses on small amounts of acreage in semi-rural areas or to places in small towns (if they are situated with some privacy).


We have lived in cities, small towns, and in the country. We know that we do not want to live in a house that is too 'aware' of the neighbors, but we also realize that as we age we could benefit from a place with destinations for walking as well as a sense of community and proximity to shopping and other services. Having city water and sewage would probably be a plus, as well.


Logic says that going forward we should be in some sort of town setting, yet we continue to find places outside of town that are appealing. We understand that ultimately we will have to make our own choice, but we'd be interested to hear from others who are (or have been) in this situation and what conclusions you have reached.

[7th generation]

I would do beaucoup research online and then visit the areas that piqued your interests. What you described could be one in a hundred towns.

This would narrow down your search. Then come back and ask about particular areas/towns for further info. What's nice about City Data Maine is we live all over the state and are very knowledgeable about our hoods. Good luck!

[Two Nice Guys]

Thanks for your good advice. My question was one of a general nature (small town vs rural living), while we gather the more specific information that you suggested we get. I will try to ask more specific questions when I have them. Since we are 2500 miles away I guess that I became carried away by the idea of mining other folks for thoughts...lazy me!

[Unicorn hunter]

Well, I'm not there yet, but definitely understand what you are saying! Fantasized about living out in the boonies, with no nearby neighbors, listening to the frogs and crickets. However, I came to the realization that as one ages, this is probably not the best plan. Plus, like you didn't want to deal with well water and/or septic tank. I hope to find a nice, safe, smallish town with a house within walking distance of town/amenities, but not right on top of the neighbors. For me, if there is at least say a driveway/garage separating the houses, I can live with that. Don't want to be looking into each others windows, or hearing conversations if sitting on my deck! I hope we can both find what we are looking for! I think I have my location selected, and will report back on how it works out!

[maineguy8888]

It all depends on your circumstances. We had to choose between:
-- 7 acres on the very edge of town, with its own pond, woods, etc. (The town is population 2,000). Probably a six to eight minute walk to the little downtown area.
--A little over half an acre in a quiet, out-of-the-way neighborhood right next to the downtown. (The town has 8,000 people).

So, fairly different places. We chose the house in town. It ended up working for us, because the houses are far apart, tons of trees, etc. There are several empty lots. In our backyard, you literally can barely see any other houses or buildings. It's very quiet.
I am glad we chose what we did, because we have three young kids. We can easily take them to tons of places and activities. And the supermarket is a two minute walk.

[Northern Maine Land Man]

Here are some criteria for consideration. Can you ride from your property to the post office, grocery store and gas station on your ATV? Can you do it on your snowmobile in the North? Can you get a building permit for $5? Can you run your ATV or snowmobile 100 miles to the ocean and back; legally?

In a pinch, can you run your ATV or snowmobile to the hospital? Can you ride them to the airport? Legally?

We can do these things in Maine. OK, we can't do it everywhere. There are towns with very restrictive regulations. There qre large areas that do not allow ATVs. These places are easily avoided. Remember them. Do not shop there. The town may figure out that their hostility to their taxpayers and neighbors are detrimental to their economy. They will figure it out eventually.

[LilyMae521]

I think I understand what OPs are referring to.

We are going through something very similar.

We know it is practical as we age to live closer in town. And we very much want to be able to walk -on sidewalks!- to many of the places we go to frequently. Also, when we move to a new location, we want to more easily meet and talk to people, instead of being too isolated.

But we drool over the "country" homes we see on line...

It helped us a lot when we realized the country homes we like on line are very similar to where we live now, so they are inside our "comfort zone" They are very appealing bc they are very familiar.

Now that we recognize- "yeah I like this one bc it's like where I live now" we find it easier to remind ourselves that we actually want something different when we move.

Just putting the words "inside comfort zone" into the equation helped us realize that it wasn't always how nice the house was, just how familiar and therefore comforting it was.

Hope this helps.

Maineguy, sounds like you have the best of both worlds.

[BumbleBeeHunter]

I think you ought to live in a small town but THE RIGHT small town. We chose the right small town in a rural setting.

This town isn't perfect but overall, people mind their own business. Yes they say whether someone is home or not, ask what you're up to, but not in a malicious way generally. They aren't caddy like the other nearby towns. You need to look out for this. Most everyone here has worked with the public so has a level of class about them. We can walk into town, it's about 1/2-1 mile down the road. It's wonderful here and so are the people. Good luck, I hope you find your perfect paradise


It isn't legal to ride our snowmobilies into town here during winter. You'd have to ride on the highway which is a no-no though it's not a busy highway. Oh well

[BumbleBeeHunter]

Originally Posted by maineguy8888

It all depends on your circumstances. We had to choose between:
-- 7 acres on the very edge of town, with its own pond, woods, etc. (The town is population 2,000). Probably a six to eight minute walk to the little downtown area.
--A little over half an acre in a quiet, out-of-the-way neighborhood right next to the downtown. (The town has 8,000 people).

So, fairly different places. We chose the house in town. It ended up working for us, because the houses are far apart, tons of trees, etc. There are several empty lots. In our backyard, you literally can barely see any other houses or buildings. It's very quiet.
I am glad we chose what we did, because we have three young kids. We can easily take them to tons of places and activities. And the supermarket is a two minute walk.

Sounds perfect!

[maineguy8888]

Originally Posted by LilyMae521

I think I understand what OPs are referring to.

We are going through something very similar.

We know it is practical as we age to live closer in town. And we very much want to be able to walk -on sidewalks!- to many of the places we go to frequently. Also, when we move to a new location, we want to more easily meet and talk to people, instead of being too isolated.

But we drool over the "country" homes we see on line...

It helped us a lot when we realized the country homes we like on line are very similar to where we live now, so they are inside our "comfort zone" They are very appealing bc they are very familiar.

Now that we recognize- "yeah I like this one bc it's like where I live now" we find it easier to remind ourselves that we actually want something different when we move.

Just putting the words "inside comfort zone" into the equation helped us realize that it wasn't always how nice the house was, just how familiar and therefore comforting it was.

Hope this helps.

Maineguy, sounds like you have the best of both worlds.

We kind of do have the best of both worlds. I was leaning towards the more rural place (it even had a beautiful horse farm right across the road!). But my wife was a bit leery of country living (she is from Toronto). And she won.

Now, I'm kind of glad that she did. The more rural place was on a fairly main road, and big trucks would go by doing 40-45 mph. Our current neighborhood doesn't lead to anywhere else, and only has about 15 houses altogether. The street we are on is a great place for the kids to ride scooters, etc. It's flat and has almost no traffic. Plus like I said you can't even see any neighbors from the back yard.....the lots are big and the woods have grown up all around the neighborhood. The river is only about five minutes walk away. (Our only close neighbor is on one side; their house is about 50 feet from ours. But they are literally never outside, and we have so many trees and bushes between us that six months of the year, we can't even see their house. So I can walk around the house in my skivvies......).

The convenience of living in town has been so good for us. We live next to a very active, walkable downtown and I can walk to almost anything I need. (Walking to Hannaford is actually only about a minute and a half.)

The thing I never understood is people who move to a rural house, but have another house or two very close by (just like you would have if you lived in a town or city). I always thought that defeats the whole purpose......