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Old 10-20-2009, 11:04 AM
 
1,961 posts, read 3,041,901 times
Reputation: 1783

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Great Dave Barry excerpt, mermaid!
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Old 10-20-2009, 11:07 AM
 
1,961 posts, read 3,041,901 times
Reputation: 1783
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maine Writer View Post
I heard this at lunch today.

Two blonds were sitting on the back porch on a crisp autumn night in Maine. They were admiring the moon.

Blond 1: "I've always wanted to go to Florida. What do you think is further away, Florida or that moon?"

Blond 2: "Well duh. Can you see Florida from here?"
LOL! You hit that one on the nail! I can just imagine the setting and convo
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Old 10-20-2009, 04:28 PM
 
Location: Maine
5,669 posts, read 7,769,541 times
Reputation: 4685
I was waiting for Msina yesterday, talking to two locals I've never met before, and one started telling blond jokes. (I'm blond.) He said, "Got a blond joke for you." I popped out with "Tell slow so I can understand." I think he laughed harder at that than I did at his joke.
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Old 10-20-2009, 04:38 PM
 
Location: Maine
5,669 posts, read 7,769,541 times
Reputation: 4685
This isn't a joke (so you're not supposed to laugh). I wrote a poem today. It's one of them rhymin' poems.

The mountains are blue,
The beer is cold. (if you drink Coors you'll get that)
I split firewood all day.
Good gawd I'm old.

That's pure talent right there! Don't let anyone tell you any different. The old part was funny until I sat still too long. I've gone from 45 to 95 in just a few minutes.
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Old 10-20-2009, 05:38 PM
 
Location: Maine
7,713 posts, read 7,881,750 times
Reputation: 8243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maine Writer View Post
This isn't a joke (so you're not supposed to laugh). I wrote a poem today. It's one of them rhymin' poems.

The mountains are blue,
The beer is cold. (if you drink Coors you'll get that)
I split firewood all day.
Good gawd I'm old.

That's pure talent right there! Don't let anyone tell you any different. The old part was funny until I sat still too long. I've gone from 45 to 95 in just a few minutes.
LMAO!!!! Boy do I know that feeling!
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Old 10-22-2009, 08:29 AM
 
Location: On a Slow-Sinking Granite Rock Up North
3,518 posts, read 3,504,646 times
Reputation: 2354
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maine Writer View Post
This isn't a joke (so you're not supposed to laugh). I wrote a poem today. It's one of them rhymin' poems.

The mountains are blue,
The beer is cold. (if you drink Coors you'll get that)
I split firewood all day.
Good gawd I'm old.

That's pure talent right there! Don't let anyone tell you any different. The old part was funny until I sat still too long. I've gone from 45 to 95 in just a few minutes.
Bwaaa haaa haa...good one (and certainly one to which I can relate)!
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Old 10-23-2009, 08:18 AM
 
Location: On a Slow-Sinking Granite Rock Up North
3,518 posts, read 3,504,646 times
Reputation: 2354
Default Husband Down

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.

'Put them back, we can't afford them,' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.

Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

On the PA system: 'Cleanup on aisle 25, we have a husband down.'
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Old 10-23-2009, 06:20 PM
 
1,961 posts, read 3,041,901 times
Reputation: 1783
Thanks for the laugh, reloop! I look forward to your jokes
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Old 10-23-2009, 06:57 PM
 
Location: On a Slow-Sinking Granite Rock Up North
3,518 posts, read 3,504,646 times
Reputation: 2354
Quote:
Originally Posted by moughie View Post
Thanks for the laugh, reloop! I look forward to your jokes

Thanks. I find humor therapeutic. Especially when it cleverly exposes the foible's that we humans ALL possess.
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Old 10-25-2009, 07:02 AM
 
Location: Southwestern Ohio
4,104 posts, read 4,232,240 times
Reputation: 1559
Cute, reloop!
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