Other metrowest towns - not Lexington, MA

[vogue1]

It all really has to do with parents. High achieving parents will push their kids to achieve, and be on top (whatever that top may be). I would warned people from assigning "pressure cooker" attributes to schools. I do not believe it is so in any MA districts. It all has to do with parents and what they see is necessary for "success". I am in Belmont, schools are fine, however many parents feel need by 3rd, 4th, or 5th grade to start with some more formal tutoring program and drilling their kids to achieve and stretch beyond. Do all parents do it? No!
However, by observing public schools in Belmont, I do believe that kids in HS would not be half as "advanced" without extra help. Many parents are uber-educated, and will push their offspring. Same is happening in Lexington, Winchester, any other more upscale town in the USA.

On a side note. USA population is not as insular, as it used to be. Many of these people travel, or have spend some time living abroad, or attended foreign schools. Also, many are immigrants with different ideas of how much education kid should have at certain age. Nowadays, we can compare notes of what our friends kids are doing in Germany or France, India, Japan, China or Brazil. We do not have very difficult elementary schools. We do not expect foreign language in Kindergarten or Chemistry, Biology, and Physics in 4th. Our schools come often as very mild/dumb down by comparison. Also chronic budget issues. Some people panic. And rightly so.
My advice is to forget about schools. Find best lifestyle, and town you feel you can fit well in, and rest will fall into place. Also make sure town is not on brink of insolvency, that might *********r kids more than uber-achieving helicopter parents.

[ogre]

Some of the thoughts in the last few posts are a good example of the reality that everything is relative. It may be that someone who plans to live in an affluent suburb of Boston needs to think of the pressure in the schools in relative terms. It does seem that many affluent towns in the Boston area have more than their share of helicopter parents, and that many of these towns may have schools that are high-pressure compared to what you'd find in some areas, such as Terryellen's small town in western NY State.

It's also true that in the more affluent towns you'll find some kids feeling pressure even if the school systems have a comparatively relaxed approach. In school systems that routinely graduate a significant percentage of students who go to elite colleges, it's probably inevitable that many kids will feel some pressure to be high achievers simply because the situation lends itself to this. Some kids will be at risk of feeling inadequate if they don't reach the standards set by the high achievers surrounding them.

The upshot is that if you're planning to live in an affluent suburb of Boston, you may have to think in relative terms about what is meant by a pressure cooker school system.

Switching gears, CAtoMA, I don't know a lot about individual schools in Newton, more the reputation of the town's schools in general. As for neighborhoods, there are a few pockets that are more densely built, but generally Newton is not like a highly urban residential area where the houses stand right up against the street, with just a couple of feet between houses. Most houses have some yard space around them. Whether a neighborhood would work for you depends on how much yard space you want. If you're looking for a yard of some pretty good size, you'd do best to generally look toward the south side of town. The Waban section is one area in particular that is a bit less densely built than Newton's northern neighborhoods.

These pictures from City Data's front page for Newton provide an idea of the typical density in Newton:

http://www.city-data.com/picfilesv/picv17026.php

http://www.city-data.com/picfilesc/picc54343.php.

As you can see, in much of Newton you're not going to have an acre or two, but on the other hand, the houses are not crammed in just inches apart either.

[ogre]

Originally Posted by Katzpur

Weird! I didn't know "Mitt" was an "initial." Where does that fall in the alphabet?

The place of the letter "Mitt" in the alphabet is a bit difficult to pin down. "Mitt" is a complex letter. Its position can vary, depending on the circumstances.

[Beachcomber4]

Originally Posted by vogue1

It all really has to do with parents. High achieving parents will push their kids to achieve, and be on top (whatever that top may be). I would warned people from assigning "pressure cooker" attributes to schools. .

Parent expectations effect school expectations so the pressure does make its way into schools. That is not mutually exclusive to high performing parents either. Even worse are low/non achieving parents who insist their child is gifted and when they don't achieve to what they believe is their high ability, blame educators, coaches or anyone else they feel is holding their child back. That adds another wrinkle to problems already plaguing schools. In low performing districts, it translates to watered down curriculum where parents get the satisfaction of having their kid in honors classes that realistically would be considered watered down CP classes in high performing districts.

[goyguy]

Agreed, in terms of "pressure cooker" atmospheres - peer and parental influences are the major components of that. The downside of the elite school districts is that they're all about high college-placement rates, the more prestigious the colleges the better. The kids who aren't intellectually and/or spiritually inclined toward being on that conveyor belt are swept along regardless. Bearing that in mind, I think Newton North High School is the best for somewhat bucking that trend while staying well thought of. Newton South is markedly more "preppy," in league with Lexington, Belmont, Weston, et al.
Not yet discussed is Needham, a decidedly upper-middle-class suburb along Route 128 and also served by three commuter-rail stations. It has a viable town center (though the movie theater, sadly, closed a few years ago) and a highly-ranked school system. There's a healthy sports rivalry with adjacent Wellesley (aka Smellsley, Swellsley, etc), which is a step up the economic ladder + more heavily WASP and snobby. Your typical Needham home is a mid-20th-Century 7-to-10-room Colonial on a quarter-acre of land.
Somewhat similar to Needham, though larger and more economically diverse, is Natick (between Wellesley and Framingham.) Its schools are respectable if not "excellent," with the most fame having been derived for their being the academic and athletic foundation of local football demigod Doug Flutie. Within its boundaries you can find both charming smaller old houses toward the town center, and 1950's-to-70's subdivisions and more recent cookie-cutter Colonial and McMansion clusters farther out. There are still a few working farms on the south side of town along or near Route 16, which are popular places to visit in the warmer months for procuring fresh eggs and produce. For more "modern" shopping, the humongous Natick Mall (now "rebranded" as the "Natick Collection") and the adjacent Shopper's World along with their spawned strip malls overwhelm the landscape along Route 9 and guarantee your never having to travel far to find whatever you want or need. Ditto for filling tummies.
There's no way that the youth of any given community can be lumped into a single category, for every town has kids of all kinds (personality-wise if not culturally.) Each and every school has its cliques of brainiacs, jocks, stoners, and so on. But after some three decades of observation I have to say that Belmont wins hands down in terms of having a higher percentage of incorrigible brats than any other suburb around. This may have to do with there being three distinct economic strata within the community (super-affluent Belmont Hill, the broad swath of town with big Colonials on postage-stamp lots, and Waverley Square and southern neighborhoods containing many duplexes and three-families and some apartment complexes.) A friend from a Barbadian family once memorably remarked, spot-on, "Only special White folks get to live in Belmont." The town center, anchored by a small franchise of Macy's, is top-heavy with cutesy boutiques and trendy - generally short-lived - restaurants. Even the street lights are "precious." While adolescents everywhere gravitate into small friendship circles with variable degrees of flexibility allowed, in Belmont there's a definite "better than you" era projected from groups of kids as a rule. This behavior isn't absent in other places, but isn't as prevalent either. My hunch is that this isn't only because of the local class divisions. There may also be a perceived need for feeling superior to adjacent Watertown + Waltham (less wealthy), Arlington (very similar but bigger), Lexington (richer by and large), and Cambridge (for everything Cambridge is or is assumed to be, including the fact that Harvard Square is a magnet for bored Belmont youth.) No matter. I think a child, whether in kindergarten or entering 12th grade, would have a tough go of it being the "new kid" in Belmont unless s/he is highly self-confident or visibly excels at something socially acceptable. Elsewhere, there's an automatic advantage right away as long as one conforms in dress and appearance and has cool stuff. Teens, tweens, and younger persons in other places just seem to be nicer more often, whether or not they'd necessarily be kind to a stranger their age in their midst.
Had I had children and been restricted to the western Boston suburbs for making a choice as to where to settle, I'd've opted for one of the communities I've mentioned favorably in this post (also Maynard, Arlington, Framingham, Acton, or perhaps Waltham.) But that speaks to my personal experience as a child of pressure-cooker suburbia who'd never subject their own offspring to the college-prep conveyor belt and the attitude problems of too many kids on that ride.

[takewuw&leavetherest]

Currently residing in Lexington, I feel there is pressure all around. If you have an average student, that student will surely be aware of their "average" status, which there is nothing wrong with being an average student, but I can't image that being good for the self-esteem of a youth in a town like Lexington. There are two large cultures here in Lexington that always strive for over-achievement, as a result, the schools cater to that pace/level.
Excessive wealth is another issue here, if you're not excessively wealthy. Raising your children around this can be challenging no matter how grounded your family is, how morally structured home life is, the values you instill etc.

[lz1982]

I have relatives in Newton and it does seem very pressure-cooker to me. However, with Newton being a larger city (I think about 3X the population of Lexington), you do have a little more economic diversity. Newton is still affluent, but not homogenous.

[tlcapo]

I live in Bedford and don't find it to be "meh" - I find it to be a great community - giving students an elite education without the elitist attitude.

I have been here 9 years and believe it offers a great mix of affordable and high end neighborhoods - the parental support and involvement in the schools is inspiring - It is not a pressure cooker but there are opportunities to excel.....

Just my 2 cents....