Sharon? Caucasion single mom/Chinese daughter (Boston, Cambridge: fit in, 2014, rent)

[triciaevesta]

i'm very conflicted about where to move. my daughter doesn’t start kindergarten until sep 2014 but we sold our house in july and have been living with my parents. i really thought we'd have found something by now.

i’ve only looked in brookline and newton and i need some advice as to whether or not i should start to look in sharon? i want a community with a strong asian population. the prices in newton and brookline have continued to climb in the few short months i’ve been looking. there is little inventory and houses are going for over ask.

the amount i'm going to spend depends on the town because the taxes vary so much. for example, i could roughly afford a house for 525K in sharon, 600K in newton, and 625K in brookline. (625K in brookline isn't that realistic, although sometimes you can find a house in that range in the south brookline/chestnut hill area).

you can get a great house in sharon for 400K. and i feel like as a single mom that would put a lot less financial pressure on me. (although the high taxes really annoy me - they'd be more than my mortgage)!

here are my concerns....

- i've heard that sharon is mostly jewish (we're not). i don't have a problem with that, i just don't want my daughter to feel left out.

- from what i understand about the asian population, many of the school children are first generation. will we feel left out in that repect as well? is it mostly mandarin speakin?

i'm really having a hard time with this and it's been keeping me up at nights for months.

ANY help or advice would be really appreciated!!! i just want to do what's best for my daughter.

[miu]

Do you have to buy right now? Why not just rent?

[kingeorge]

Belmont is close to Cambridge and Boston, has good and easy commute to both. Also boasts huge Asian population--from all over the place, China, Japan, Korea, India etc. Your daughter would fit very well in. I would assume that Newton should be diverse as well. Not sure about Sharon.
Both are very expensive towns, safe. Belmont is bit mismanaged and there are some issues with funding, but no town is perfect. Newton like Belmont is dealing with influx of younger families with kids, and there are some funding and overcrowding issues. I would think they will figure out how to deal with it more effectively soon.
But, both towns are still very good towns for education.
Brookline is great if you can afford it! I am unaware of any funding and overcrowding issues in Brookline as of yet. Brookline offers Chinese language very early in elementary school. Not sure which one. Maybe somebody else can help you better.
You should talk to all school superintendent offices, as well as visit. I am sure they will be happy to help you out. Unless you visit, you can not get good sense of the community. Also rent first!! You need better info on the area before you buy!!
Good luck.

[sharencare]

You can also look at Lexington, Lincoln, Wayland, Acton, Wellesley, and Arlington if you want a larger Asian population and good school systems. You can also buy a very nice condo in Newton for your price point, and you would not have to worry about maintenance as much and you would be within easy access of the city. My husband also has many co-workers with adopted Asian kids, so you should check out if there are any local networks. I noticed the Caucasian families with adopted Asian kids tend to live in the upper middle class suburbs.
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I have an Asian American friend who grew up in Brookline but lives in Sharon now. She says she sees other Asian families around. She doesn't mind the relative lack of diversity, but then again she grew up in Brookline with a sister. She was trying to convince me to move out to Sharon, and I must admit the housing stock there is great and the schools sound top touch. And mind you, our partners are white guys and our kids will be mixed. We're always worried about how our kids will "fit in" because they will look different, but they won't identify with Asian culture like we did growing up (though to be frank, both of us are Americanized to the point we can barely speak Chinese). If it's any comfort, she's willing to move out to Sharon. The only thing she didn't like about it, is that it's very suburban--as in, she thought her kids would grow bored once they hit high school.

Anyway, with your budget, you might want to seriously look into Lexington. I knew a couple of people with adopted Asian kids who lived there. If I could afford it and if it were near my work, I would move there in a heartbeat. I'm Asian American and my best friend (Asian, born in China) grew up there. I grew up in Boston's Dorchester and South Boston neighborhoods, which are relatively diverse compared to the suburbs. I would tell her how racists some of the neighborhood children were and she totally did not understand the concept. In Lexington, she was never picked on for being Asian or foreign-looking. Anyway, I think any town with a very educated population and committed parents like Sharon will be fine for your daughter. Their parents would have likely encountered Asian Americans in business, medical, technology, or college settings, and won't see them as necessarily any different from other Americans. I think since she's starting in kindergarten, she'll grow up with her peers and they'll accept her. I presume you are shopping in the upper middle class end of the market, and if it's any comfort, I know a lot of Asian Americans who grew up in relatively "white" educated towns like Concord and Needham, and they were fine. When I talk to my Asian friends about racism, the ones with unpleasant stories actually lived in Boston (diversity does not equal no prejudice) or out of the middle of nowhere out of MA (if you've never seen another Asian person up close, there may be staring and other unpleasantness).

As for other first generation Asian Americans, I wouldn't worry about it. Usually the kids get Americanized anyway, and speak mostly English. Their parents, if they live in Newton, Brookline, or Sharon, most likely are educated professionals and will speak English. If you want to become best friends with other parents, that really depends on the town. I think some of the Asian kids in Wellesley go to Chinese school together and their families might have a once a year party, but it seems to me they just blend in with the rest of the population--share carpools with non-Asian neighbors and get invited to the same birthday parties as everyone else. But towns like Brookline and Newton are so large, you can only get so chummy with so many other parents.

I heard in Lexington, they seem to always be having cultural festivals in the high school if that's what you're looking for.

[kingeorge]

Great tip sharencare. Of all mentioned Lexington Public School District has 28% of student of Asian decent. Brookline and Sharon 18%, Newton 15% and Belmont 14.5%.

[sharencare]

Originally Posted by kingeorge

Great tip sharencare. Of all mentioned Lexington Public School District has 28% of student of Asian decent. Brookline and Sharon 18%, Newton 15% and Belmont 14.5%.

Oh, wow, didn't know Sharon was attracting so many Asian/Asian American families with school aged kids. How did you find these stats? Any info on Natick or Wellesley?

[triciaevesta]

great resources. i especially like schooldigger because they chart trends.

SchoolDigger.com

greatschools.org


thanks everyone for the suggestions. unfortunately, lexington is too far of a commute for me or that would be my top choice.