Best schools and nursery schools for peanut allergy, Needham or nearby areas? (Boston: real estate, rental)

[lilpug]

Hi all. We just relocated to Mass from northern NJ and are looking to buy a home. Initially, we are planning to focus our search on Needham, although this may change. Currently, we're in a short-term rental in Concord until around May. We have a toddler who's been tested and diagnosed with multiple potentially life-threatening allergies, the scariest of which is peanuts for us (due to the fact that for many people just inhaling the dust of peanuts or touching a surface that had traces of peanut oil or peanut butter on it has caused them to go into anaphylactic shock). We understand that school-age kids with a 504 plan in place can get some accommodations as it is considered an ADA-protected disability. We are really looking for a school system that will be proactive and ahead of the game in terms of keeping a safe environment for kids with this type of hidden disability.

At the same time, perhaps like many parents I'm sure, we believe our child could be academically gifted in some ways, having shown startling progress in speech, amazing even doctors, etc. (for example, with a demonstrated early ability to speak relatively articulately, learning alphabet, numbers, shapes, colors, etc by 16-17 months old). With this context, we are looking for nursery schools and elementary schools that would be well suited to care for our child's physical needs and academic talents. We are open to public school, private, or parochial school.

We aren't 100% firm on considering Needham but it's our starting point in our search, for other reasons, primarily location, reasonably accessible to my husband's office in Lexington as well as other places of interest to us (Jamaica Plain, and Cambridge), and character, as well as possibility of getting more the type of house we're seeking (large, newer house with in-law suite on quiet street) in our price range versus, say Wellesley. That said, we would consider other towns like Wellesley, Wayland, Weston, Lexington, Belmont, Newton, etc. if the schools would be that much better for our circumstances. If I "had my druthers," we'd find one consolidated private school for nursery through early elementary at least, with options for continuing in private after that or transitioning to a good public school if private gets too expensive (i.e., we have more kids and therefore more tuition expense, or one of us loses a job).

If these topics have already been addressed, please point me to the thread. I was unable to find something on point when I did a search. As background about us and our outlook, my husband and I are older parents, in our early 40s, each earn six figs working excessive hours and have advanced degrees; education is very important to us and we will spend most of our budget on housing and schools, and then retirement savings. We consider ourselves upper middle class and do not live extravagantly with designer clothes and jet set vacations and such. Coming from a Catholic background (though not really practicing much), we are open to a parochial school as well.

Thank you very much for any tips and references to schools and resources you might share with us.

[MikePRU]

This article from Boston Magazine was written in 2007 has some information in it that could be useful to you. In particular, I'm thinking about the list and descriptions of the pre-schools.

Junior Achievers | Boston Magazine

I live in Needham and I'm a real estate agent here so I try to acquaint myself with the various pre-schools in and around town. I can't say any of them have a reputation for being academically rigorous, but I think I could make that general statement about the majority of pre-schools. Pre-school in this state (and probably many others) seems to be for the most part about learning pre-academic skills and learning to play nice with others. There are some pre-schools mentioned in this article that are part of larger academic institutions that may be more rigorous and some of them certainly are located near Needham. So, I'm sure you can find what you're looking for.

The thing I can absolutely tell you for sure is that one of my sons is currently in pre-school and he's been in a couple of different pre-schools. However, the one universal thing at all the schools has been NO NUTS. Even when there's not a kid in the classroom with a nut allergy, they just don't take a chance. I'm sure wherever you choose to send your child the school will be quite sensitive to their nut allergy.

I'd also like to offer that I do love living in Needham. It's got a little bit of everything: public transportation, easy highway access, proximity to Boston, a nice town center, friendly people, great schools, etc., etc., etc. Yet, it's less expensive than Wellesley, Lexington, and Newton the most similar of the other area towns. It's a combination that's hard to beat. Some of the other towns you've mentioned like Wayland for example is a bit of a different kind of animal as the town lacks a lot of the amenities that Needham, Wellesley, Lexington, and Newton have (and Wayland RE taxes are RIDICULOUS).

[lilpug]

Hi MikePRU,

Thank you so much for this detailed reply, and also for the excellent article link! Really appreciate your sharing your personal experiences and professional expertise! Your description of Needham is exactly what we're hoping for in a new hometown.

[MikePRU]

Originally Posted by lilpug

Hi MikePRU,

Thank you so much for this detailed reply, and also for the excellent article link! Really appreciate your sharing your personal experiences and professional expertise! Your description of Needham is exactly what we're hoping for in a new hometown.

No problem! I know most of the towns you listed like the back of my hand. So, if you have any other questions just let me know.

[jayrandom]

What's your budget? Needham is a good choice. You might consider Westwood, as well. Schools are comparable and a little more affordable. Not as many amenities in town but lots near by if you're OK crossing a town line to do your shopping.

As to schools, I'd say that public schools in any of the towns that have been mentioned are good enough. By that I mean their future success will depend far more on them and you than the school. Private schools may give your kid a slight boost but at a huge expense; I think that money would be better spent on college.

[audemars]

For an allergy friendly preschool, try the Teddy Bear Club (Newton and Lincoln). We did a ton of research and checked references from other allergy families, and we couldn't be happier with the choice we've made. They are top notch.

[lilpug]

Thank you all so much. Apologies for the lengthy delay in this reply, as apparently I didn't subscribe to the thread when I started it. Jayrandom, we'll consider Westwood. We had thought it might be a bit too lengthy of a commute to Lexington. I don't mind shopping in other towns, as long as it's within 15 minutes' drive or so. Not exactly sure of our budget right now, depending on selling our house out of state first and what interest rates look like then when we're buying later this year, but we're initially estimating around $1.4. And of course, the more we spend on housing, then perhaps the better the public schools need to be since we'll have less of a budget for the fancy private schools.

Audemars, merci for that excellent tip on The Teddy Bear Club preschool. It's funny you should mention it, I just came across their website today and was thinking I'd like to find out more about their allergen policy, because it looks like a lovely place and we have close ties to France and speak the language a bit (or used to). I am so glad to know that you and others with similar issues have had a great experience there. We recently spent Christmas eve night with our ptherwise robust little one in the E.R. and on prescription medication for a few days afterwards, after mere contact exposure to people eating nuts at a holiday gathering. As a result we had to postpone Christmas. Thankfully, he's better now and is too young to know for certain what day Santa was supposed to arrive, so all's well that ends well, but the experience has really made it painfully clear that we will need to be ultra careful in choosing an environment where a tot with this condition will be spending time without parental supervision.

Thanks again all of you and Needham guru MikePRU.

[jayrandom]

That's a big budget, why not just pick Lexington? I definitely withdraw my suggestion of Westwood. Needham, while nice, doesn't make as much sense as Lexington, either. Maybe if you both worked in Boston, but Lexington schools are better and it's significantly closer to your husband's office.

[MikePRU]

Originally Posted by lilpug

We recently spent Christmas eve night with our ptherwise robust little one in the E.R. and on prescription medication for a few days afterwards, after mere contact exposure to people eating nuts at a holiday gathering. As a result we had to postpone Christmas. Thankfully, he's better now and is too young to know for certain what day Santa was supposed to arrive, so all's well that ends well, but the experience has really made it painfully clear that we will need to be ultra careful in choosing an environment where a tot with this condition will be spending time without parental supervision.

That's really horrible to hear. I have a cousin who's kids have severe allergies to certain foods including peanuts. They can't even be in the same room with peanuts. It really makes everyday living a challenge.

Originally Posted by jayrandom

That's a big budget, why not just pick Lexington? I definitely withdraw my suggestion of Westwood. Needham, while nice, doesn't make as much sense as Lexington, either. Maybe if you both worked in Boston, but Lexington schools are better and it's significantly closer to your husband's office.

I believe lilpug did say that they are considering Lexington. However, I wouldn't call $1.4M a big budget in Lexington. New(er) homes on quiet side streets usually start in the $1.5M-$1.6M range.

I would also say that dealing with buyers on a daily basis, I've found that not everyone makes the choice that makes the most "sense." Often, people have different priorities and they make the decision which makes the most "sense" for them. Many times I've helped people buy homes in Lexington that from a commuting standpoint Needham or Wellesley would have been better choices. I've also helped people buy in Needham who could have had a shorter commute if they bought in Lexington. Some people just fall in love with one town for some reason or another. Maybe it's that they can get the house they want there in their budget or maybe they like the feel of the school system better. You just never know.

[Utopian Slums]

I have nothing to contribute to the thread other than to thank you for using the phrase "Nursery School!" I havent heard it in decades!