My love letter to Massachusetts, after six months together (Boston: credit card, school)

[mom4two]

Originally Posted by MovingForward

People in Boston are no more nor less friendly than people anywhere else. It's ridiculous to suggest otherwise.

Actually it's True! I was born and raised in Mass and have moved to Charlotte, NC. The first Two things I noticed, How Clean and How Friendly.
It's a culture shock for sure.

[Garson]

I second that mom4two - I never realized people were so unfriendly in MA growing up there - until I left. People seem much friendlier and happier where I live now. People in the Boston area are so driven...to what I do not know....

I do think though that the further you get from Boston the friendlier people are. Outside 495 is a whole other world.

[Martha Anne]

You have to decide whether or not you really like the New England culture in the first place. It is not like the South, it just isn't. I have met plenty of people who down deep really prefer their own regional or state culture and that is completely understandable, but it is also true that many newcomers cannot adjust to the way of life in Massachusetts because it is so different from what they are used to.

To be completely honest, I don't believe that you understand the true New England culture. You are wrong to think that they think you want something just because you say have a nice day. They are just more reserved, that's all, and this is not a bad thing IMO. It is just different from what you want and expect. But don't misread what they are thinking. If you asked them, you'd surely be surprised and find out that you had it all wrong what was on their minds.

[Martha Anne]

<<
By the way, I love southern accents and agree that the Boston accent is really ugly. >>

When I moved back to New York, I met many people who were and are absolutely charmed and amazed by the Boston accent! It really is a matter of taste. If you want to hear ugly, listen to a typical New York City accent - but again, that is my opinion. I would much, much rather have a Boston accent and say, "How ah you?" than " How awe you!".

[thenewNewEnglander]

packandready,

I must admit your post made me cringe. Not because i disagree with- but please let me say I dont agree either, but because there is indeed a degree of truth in what you say. And I absolutely must applaud the manner in which you are stating your concerns. More of a question than a statement really. You are not bashing our culture or making some blanket judgement(which seems quite popular out there in Americaland). You are clearly an open minded individual, and dare a say likely a very warm heart. I in fact think you make an excellent addition to Massachusetts and the greater New England. Thank you for making this your home.
The Northeast, in my opinion, is actually going through a great transtion as we speak.
But first-
Yes. We can be standoffish, rude, suspicious, elitist, way too left-wing, way too right wing, and a whole host of other things. We are indeed a VERY diverse place. Me? I'm proud of all that. For God Sake just have an opinion. We value intelligence highly here... or at least the intelligent do. But you can read all about our culturalisms in many other posts here. And none of it matters really. After all- its what you see and perceive that matters most.
You're from The South I summize...
Great. Stay yourself. Dont mold or lose too much of yourself to fit in. Dig in. Stay nice. I'm a native Bay Stater but lived in Atlanta for 7 years. I saw the difference. Indeed somethings are better, but not everything. But I will admit, Southerners are nice. Even when they shouldnt be. We on the other hand believe in saying things that need to be said, even when considered rude, crass, or otherwise unsavory. We believe in free and open communication even when it violates what may be considered polite.

BUT.

I personally think we're getting better. At least out here in the burbs. Boston- cant speak for it. Its a big city. Full of many people who arent even from here. I'm sure a degree of them are living their own romanticised version of what it is to be a foul mouthed tough talkin Bostonian, and some are just plain ignorant and rude locals who are pissed off at the world- Its hard to look our rich in the face sometimes, when youre family has been poor and stuck for 15 generations. Not everyone around here has a trust fund as Im sure you know. But its pretty hard to put everyone in one boat. And if youre only looking for the rude and brash, you will find them. Today. AS with our diversity you'll see pretty much EVERYONE today- Irish, Russians, Gays, Blacks, Portuguese... I mean everyone. But you'll also see people who are in my opinion some of the most humble God ever created. Who would literally give ya the shirt off their back and ask for nothing in return. People who, if you dared speak to them would sit and talk to you for hours- before they even knew your name. People who might be flattered that you wanted to. We like things casual around here. We're all just people. With our strengths and flaws, histories and futuries, hopes and dreams.
Its probably hard for you to connect with people that you feel similar to. I can only imagine. When I went South, Southerners made it easy. Not many will go out of their way to make you feel welcome. Cakes at your door are the stuff of legends around here.
Its true most people will great it with a.) we're about to get robbed, b.) what are you selling or c.) a general distrust in the form of what the eff do you want?

But look at our history. Every scam you can possibly imagine was tested out here, and probably something like 200 years ago. We've seen it before. Wether it was bad labor practice, environmental crimes, or just a new Ponzi scheme- its been done to us already and we like to think we see it coming a mile away. Its not you, its just a self defense that's been ingrained in us for so long.

Now- Back to the part about CHANGE!!! YAHOO!~ CHANGE~!


I personally think we're changing. Believe it or not we're alot happier than we were about 15 years ago. The 80's really kicked our butts in Mass. After what was already a good 60 years of outsourcing slowly eating away at us. We used to make EVERYTHING around here. Brockton, Mass was the shoe capital of the world, Lowell made a helluvalot of fabric, New Bedford and Fall River seemed to do everything and Taunton worked alot of Silver. Its all gone. We were outsourced before the word was invented.
And then we had a not so bright Governor, Michael Dukakis. Maybe you saw that great Republican election ad of him riding in the tank? Yeah George Herbert Walker Bush carried 49 states that year I believe. All but tiny Mass. So the 80's brought alot of outsourcing, a mean real estate slow down, high unemplyment, and just a general malaise.... THAT FINALLY WE ARE STARTING TO COME OUT OF!


Now things really arent so bad. So many people have owned their homes for so long we measure equity in 1000's of percent. So we're not crying so much about giving back 10 or 20% of value. Unless we were otherwise hoping to pack it up and move to Georgia or North Carolina where would supposedly live like Kings . Meanwhile trading that great italian food, rich history, cultural diversity, and general convenience- I oftem say where I live I can get to anything I need in 7 minutes or less at 35 miles per hour. Try that in Atlanta, Dallas, LA, or Orlando. We have a state that respects diversity of ALLLLLLL of its citizens. Not the 90% that "moral majority" approve of. (Im a straight Christian[Catholic] man who is proud of this state's stand on Gay marriage. After all we hated slavery too- long before that one was decided. I also have living proof of how our SOCIALIST leanings pay off right in my home. The Massachusetts Universal Healthcare Law SAVED my mom's life. And I mean saved. Saved her from a stroke, bladder cancer, and a heart attack waiting in the wind. All for free. Thank God for this state, and all its imperfections!

But I believe there is a new feeling here. A feeling that our future might look something like our past. I see young people that want community, family, and God. A young generation that feels more like their grandparents than their parents. I see a wiser generation that sees where we went wrong and what exactly we lost. I see people wanting things to clean up and be new. I see some new ideas slowly taking shape in many towns- it helps that I drive alot.
And man... Those Sox and Pats sure are bring some good luck, lots of attention, and who knows how much cash to town. Oh and the C's too. And we cant forget how good of a job the Bruins did for the year. Sure looks like God likes us at the moment to me.





But PackandReady,
People actually want you to bring that cake to the door, just like you wanted that cake when you got here. But it never came. I see people who are becoming tired of the far left ideals, and wanna come back to the center abit. I myself believe there are lost of places we waste money and that people should work hard to better their own lives and not wait for a handout so much. But good God I see a corporate culture that would milk you dry of your last drop of blood if there was a buyer. And as soon as they could get a foreign pint cheaper they'd leave you to wither with anemia, homeless and sick.
i know this was a longwinded rant. Probably hard to follow- it was indeed stream of consciousness.

Please stay in Mass.
Help make it better.
Be you.
Dont give up on us.
Help us grow and renew.
After all.... I personally believe its already on the way.
the South will undoubtedly be forced to raise taxes to pay for all the new needs that came with all those displaced Yankees. But we already have all that stuff here. We just need to repaint, change some signs, add a helluvalot of road signs (haha), and bring back some charm.
So I nominate you, head of the social committee, head of customer service, head of public relations, and main greeter!

PS I hear the Cape is lookin for workas bigtime. You should go, you'll have a wicked pissa time drinkin Sam Adams and eatin clam cakes with all ya new friends.
Good luck!

[MarsMary]

I just have to say that I moved to MA in January. My neighbors are friendly, people hold doors for me, people in stores tell me to have a nice day...it feels equally as friendly as VA where we used to live....maybe we lucked out with the small town we chose....

[findingmesomeday]

My experience here (going on 11 years) hasn't been terrible but there's not much to entice me to stay, either. I've made friends and have been involved in the community. However, my closest and lifelong friends continue to be people I met back in college, high school and even my first job or two! I guess that's a factor of age and stage in life. Everyone gets busy with kids, mortgages, job stress, etc., and no matter where you live, life just isn't as spontaneous. So yes, I have friends here and yes we actually do stuff together every so often but if I left tomorrow I wouldn't pine away for MA. You can have the weather. After 11 years I'm sick of it. I would miss the quaintness of New England and would miss our town--a great place for the kids to grow up. I would not miss the cost of living, the cost of heating the house, mud season, etc.

[thenewNewEnglander]

Originally Posted by MarsMary

I just have to say that I moved to MA in January. My neighbors are friendly, people hold doors for me, people in stores tell me to have a nice day...it feels equally as friendly as VA where we used to live....maybe we lucked out with the small town we chose....

Thank you!

And watch.... it's getting better!

[bzmatka]

I apologize for offending anyone, but I can't stand a Boston accent, and my family is from Boston! I prefer southern accents. That said, I've found Boston fairly unfriendly the two times I've lived there. But I met my husband there, so well, that's something!

[crazyworld]

Marsmary.thank you. It is nice to have someone say something nice about us.
People do love to rip Bostonians apart.