Are mainlanders treated badly?? (Honolulu, Kihei: appointed, crimes, how much)

[Tin]

Lawiii1 is right.. you have to give more than you take.

I lived on oahu when i was a kid and moved back to the big island after 20 years of absence. I have been here 3 years and people are just beginning to accept me, even though i was born here.

It has been a lonely 3 years I can tell you, and hard to keep giving and giving and smiling and smiling when people just think.. "ahh why get know him? he move back mainland sure"

Many people come and dont stay long and due to this fact, when you celebrate your first 2 years here, its a big deal.

I would say come live here for at least a summer before pulling stakes and moving..allow your kids to make some friends if they can.
If you act swiftly or on impulse it may well be one of the most costly mistakes you could ever make

aloha

[Hawaiiandreamer]

Dear Maui-bound,
I lived on the Big Island for many years and had to leave for two reasons: the sugar industry went down of which we were a major part, my husband flew as a crop duster and had to relocate on the mainland. The second reason was me with horrible debilitating allergies!!!! You are entering a tropical world which is beautiful, gorgeous and if you have asthma or allergies, BEWARE! There is a lot mold, fungus,pollens, vog, etc..If that is not a problem, then you are blessed indeed!

I never had a problem with the sweet "golden" people, infact I have fond memories of every one of them. If you can be relaxed, laugh, not be uptight or rude, and enter into a toned down dialogue, kid around, because they love to laugh, then you will become a kamaina for sure. (Child of the land) I love Hawaii and would recommend highly a visit because everyone on this thread is right, it is America, but not really! Lots of ethnic races that get along pretty darn well for the most part, and Haole's could learn from those dear people. I had a great experience there except for the allergies. Nothing worked until I moved to the high desert of Reno Nevada, and now I am a Hawaiian dreamer!

[GirlinAZ]

Originally Posted by Jonah K

Here's a story about a guy that was minding his own business simply buying candy for his children at a store in Puna. Apparently, a local didn't like the way he looked (ie. like a "mainlander") and decided to give him a broken jaw.
http://www.hawaiitribune-herald.com/articles/2007/05/14/local_news/local01.txt (broken link)

I guess as long as no one gets killed, "it's really pretty mellow still"; however, one has to remember that Hawai'i is not necessarily a "paradise" for everyone.

I couldn't get the link to work, mind copying/pasting the report into the forum? thanks

[Eh It's Me]

NCLB is hurting all our schools , Is your kid In sport , Hawaii great there also Charter School here you might want to think about,, Make sure you can get a good working pay job commute to school and work are real bad . Flexable hours Traffic bad ,,, only ugly mind people get problem in Paradise

[sassieb75]

Not just mainlander's...it's generally if you are "white". I lived it, so I know. My parent's moved us there when I was in 7th grade. Odly enough my mother grew up there and went to Lahina High on Maui. She went through the same thing back then. I did make some friends, don't get me wrong. Some of my friends parent's would not let me come over because I was a "hoale"(pronounced how-lee). We were then sent to private school and that is where I got in my first "beef" with some portuguese girl. It was the hardest year of my life and I would never raise my kids in an environment like that. Some whtes that are raised there seem to do better than those of us who come in older. Seems from what I remeber, the military kids all went to school with eachother so there were more of them to hang out with. I say if you can send your kids to school with military kids that'd be better. Other than that, move over when your kids are grown...please!

[LovinMaui]

I love the islands.... living in one of the most beautiful places in the world definitely has it's benefits. Unfortunately, there is prejudice. The hardest part for me is that my job helps the Hawaiian people yet I am still discriminated against. I work so many extra hours trying to help sustain Hawaiian agricultural companies in order to make them profitable and help make living in Hawaii affordable to many Hawaiians. I really do love living here, but am to the point where I am starting to look at options on the mainland. I have had 2 good friends of mine punched for no reason (one of which happened while we were hanging out with Hawaiians!!) and it just isn't fair. People are dying on these islands due to fatal punches!!! I feel as though I shouldn't be helping the people here if they are going to be rude to me. It is awful because they would be so worse off without my company here. If all the "Haole" companies were to leave the islands, the Hawaiian people would be screwed... I love many of the Hawaiian people. Unfortunately my wanting to be here is being ruined by a select few. Please embrace the help and don't discriminate against Haoles... Many of us are here to help and want to live in harmony!!! I will definitely leave the islands prior to having kids, I would hate to subject them to the discrimination that I have had to endure...

[thornpicker]

While everyone's individual experiences are different, it is best to take home a few key points--treat everyone how you would like to be treated, have integrity and you will be fine

I moved to Oahu when I was 20 to live with some friends (live in Arizona right now, but am moving back in 2 years) and my experience was a lot different than most here. I am haole, and so are my friends (who went to public high school there and had no problems) but I never felt any real discrimination. I only feel discrimination and a lack of aloha when I come back for a visit every year.

I never had any problem getting a job or assimilating into the culture because I shared the spirit of aloha with everyone I met. I made all kinds of friends, haole transplants like me as well as many locals, who extended themselves to me and shared their island lives with me.

Now, when I come visit, I am met with all kinds of weirdness that I wouldn't expect, but unfortunately, one encounters the "bad apple" every now and again. I was standing at a crosswalk waiting for the light when a "local" looked at me, asked me "what are you looking at? Get off my island." Not too friendly, but those people are definitely the exception.

Some locals for sure hate the tourism industry and show it in their approach to visitors, or haoles who may or may not be living there. If you're haole, then many look at you as a tourist. I have Hispanic friends that when they go to Hawaii the locals treat them kindly because they look like them--then he tells them "I'm from Arizona". Hopefully it makes people stop and think.

I think the people who have the hardest time are those who want their mainland life on an island with it's own culture. Once you get to know people and they realize who you are and that you're not there to change anything, you'll be accepted.

Just my 2cents!!
Aloha!!
Thornpicker

[China Doll Me]

Aloha,
I would reconsider a another state... Maui is up an coming alot of mainlanders transients condo hotel/time share people... Education for children on islands the pits private school would be the only way to go.. ??? home study there is one private school from Maui that I can't remember the name they produce some awsome nice educated children... The islands are getting worse on prjudism between the real local islanders, mainlanders (the want to be islanders and broken down cry babies, one thought process me me me's nice but very two face-they want the islands love which there killing the real Aloha of the hawaiian islands ) and then you got the FOB (fresh off the boat foreigners or our governments hidden sweep under the table mess they made abroad.. The islands got alot of that-needy and greedy asian mentality ) It's definitely a mixed plate here on the islands.. Oahu to commercialized, Maui advancing rapidly... I hear as well as the big island Hawaii... Career jobs for both of you becareful there is a cut in pay.. Unless your really good at your career/craft which they need mainland mentality... Hopefully your and awsome freelancer.. Medical not so good there trying as we speak to somewhat control that on better services all the good doctors past away or retired the change/transition is brutal, I say a few more years... Great party island professionalism iffy you need a great networking group and even that becareful alot of want to be's depends on your ethics and morals-lot of want to be garbage out there...
Maybe try another state Arizona or new upcoming Nevada becareful for the areas also reg. education and the new upcoming yuppes of professionalism alot of white trash pocketed areas depends on what class braket and mentality you want for yourself and your children.. And are your kids going to college after consdider money money money and future stakes takes place... College/University in Hawaii bad rating and not worldely enough to come up to bat but they pump out very nice people... There is a foreign business University on Oahu that's became pretty good it's back stab in the heart of downtown... It's a mixed plate for upcoming future business versital...
Good luck you'll need it they have a hard time classifying me... I'm a local girl raised in Honolulu,Hawaii... It's an ugly battle but if you're grounded it's really them and there insecurities of who they are and there job careers at stake... As a caucasian mainlander you actually have an easier time if your easy and hard working with moral ethics with simplicity... It can drive you nuts working with the islanders totally different mentality that might kill you when you're use to mainland standards... Very laid back=slow to get anything or done because your waiting for someone else...
I came home 6 years ago medically ill... I saw enough and I'm discusted and got to leave medical, career, and peoples standard and morals and ethics make me sick here... I'm looking at Arizona for a new start if that doesn't work my other choice Seattle, Oregon but it's for a career project and a peace of mind and hopefully better medical services and ethics... Getting what you paid for not ripping you off or shading you for a buck...
Best wishes your kids futures along with your future is at stake
Hawaiian islands are over rated but definitely a different pace of life style and mentality can be good or nerve racking.. I suggest 5 years and no more; 7 is stretching it way to far to stay...

[colojd]

We have visited several of the islands as tourists over the years, own a lot on the big Island, and have not (yet) lived on any of the islands, but I can offer a similar perspective.

We live in Colorado and for 20 years of that time, lived in the Vail area. We are familiar with having tourists come to where we lived. Many came just to have fun and enjoy the beautiful surroundings, but many also came who were rowdy and/or rude. It was those tourists who made us all sign relief when the ski season was over. Our area basically was a small town, but swelled to many times its size when the temporary tourist population arrived each season. You do end up feeling like you are living among temporary people who feel that you, the local, are there to spoil and bend over backwards so see to it that they "have a good time".

Since people come to Hawaii to visit year round, I guess I can see where it could get old. We have some friends who also bought a lot, built a house and lived on the Big Island back in the 1980's. They loved being there, but did honestly tell us that we would find it hard because a lot of the locals were not welcoming to the white outsiders. They were friendly people and they did have friends there and got along with the locals, so their comments were offered to us as just "friendly advice".

We are considering building on our lot possibly in the next 5 - 7 years and having it as a winter home or at least a vacation home, and it is always interesting and helpful to read comments like this that come directly from people with real life experiences.

[Jonah K]

Originally Posted by thornpicker

While everyone's individual experiences are different, it is best to take home a few key points--treat everyone how you would like to be treated, have integrity and you will be fine

Unfortunately, that's not always the case especially in situations like those of Christopher Reuther and Francis "Kiko" Lester. One thing that I've learned from my time outside of Hawai'i is to be aware of one's surroundings. While I'm not going to be as wary in West O'ahu or Puna as I would be in Los Angeles or New York, I'm not going to throw common sense out the window. There's an old Hawaiian saying that goes, "Observe with the eyes; listen with the ears; shut the mouth."

Originally Posted by thornpicker

Now, when I come visit, I am met with all kinds of weirdness that I wouldn't expect, but unfortunately, one encounters the "bad apple" every now and again. I was standing at a crosswalk waiting for the light when a "local" looked at me, asked me "what are you looking at? Get off my island." Not too friendly, but those people are definitely the exception.

Some locals for sure hate the tourism industry and show it in their approach to visitors, or haoles who may or may not be living there. If you're haole, then many look at you as a tourist. I have Hispanic friends that when they go to Hawaii the locals treat them kindly because they look like them--then he tells them "I'm from Arizona". Hopefully it makes people stop and think.

There are certain non-verbal communication cues that some visitors and newcomers to Hawai'i don't fully master. Sometimes, an entire conversation between locals can consist of nothing more than a raised eyebrow, a nod, and a sympathetic smile. Many Latinos, African Americans, American Indians and other ethnic groups have similar non-verbal communication cues. Thus, one's appearance and skin color don't necessarily have much correlation when it comes to one's treatment in Hawai'i.