Mid-30s Single Male Wanting to Leave South Florida. Memphis?!? (Franklin: appointed, real estate)

[Al Joad]

I'm a mid-30s straight single guy, educated and moderately successful. Lived in Nashville after college from 2005-2012, then left for South Florida to try something different.

Now, almost six years later, I'm over South Florida, particularly the congestion, traffic, endless heat and humidity, and rude people.

I'm ready to move back to the true South, but Nashville is unrecognizable from the city I left in 2012; the hipsters have taken over, clogging the roads with traffic, driving up real estate prices, and completely transforming the vibe of the city (in my opinion, not in a good way).

So I'm considering Memphis. All my Nashville friends, of course, think I'm crazy for even mentioning it, but we all know Nashville has this strange superiority complex over Memphis, that's one thing that hasn't changed since my days in the city.

Why Memphis? Because I'm looking for the following, and I think Memphis checks most of these boxes:

- A somewhat cosmopolitan area with no dearth of single people.
- A favorable girl-to-guy ratio. (I've heard Memphis CRUSHES it in this category, something like five good-looking single girls for every good-looking single guy.)
- Not crowded, room to breathe, and light traffic.
- A strong economy and low COL. (I'm self-employed and my income doesn't vary based on where I live, so this is a big one for me. South Florida's COL is getting worse every year.)
- Somewhere the temps drop below 80 for more than two months out of the year and the humidity isn't oppressive.
- Friendlier people.

So what does everyone think? Should I be thinking Memphis? And, if so, where should I be looking in the city or its surrounding area?

Thanks!

[Salmonista]

I can vouch for people in Memphis being friendly, and the cost of living is certainly affordable. The humidity gets bad in the summer but just for a few months, really.

If you want to meet other single people, I'd say live in the city, not a suburb. All the people I know the suburbs are married with kids. (I'm sure there are single people there, but not as many, proportionally.) Check out the South Main area. It's gone through a lot of development lately and I'd want to live there if I were single and child-free!

[Al Joad]

Thanks, Salmonista. The South Main area looks intriguing, though it's very pricey compared to what you can get out in Cordova or Bartlett. As in almost double the price for a 2BR place. I've heard traffic in Memphis is really light compared to places like Nashville and South Florida. How do you think it would be to live outside the loop and drive to areas like South Main to meet up with other singles?

[dc1538]

Originally Posted by Al Joad

Thanks, Salmonista. The South Main area looks intriguing, though it's very pricey compared to what you can get out in Cordova or Bartlett. As in almost double the price for a 2BR place. I've heard traffic in Memphis is really light compared to places like Nashville and South Florida. How do you think it would be to live outside the loop and drive to areas like South Main to meet up with other singles?

Usually 20-25 minutes, maybe 30 minutes max depending on how deep in the area you stay , using Bartlett or Cordova as refrence points.

[Al Joad]

Originally Posted by dc1538

Usually 20-25 minutes, maybe 30 minutes max depending on how deep in the area you stay , using Bartlett or Cordova as refrence points.

That's not bad at all. It takes 20 minutes to go pretty much anywhere in South Florida.

Is it correct what I've heard about the single female to single male ratio in Memphis? And how many of these women in their 30's have never been married and don't have kids? One issue I started running into in Nashville before I left was that 30 was considered "old" to be unmarried, which definitely isn't the case in SFL.

[Salmonista]

Originally Posted by Al Joad

Is it correct what I've heard about the single female to single male ratio in Memphis? And how many of these women in their 30's have never been married and don't have kids? One issue I started running into in Nashville before I left was that 30 was considered "old" to be unmarried, which definitely isn't the case in SFL.

I used to live in the Pacific Northwest and the DC area. Compared to those places, people in Memphis tend to get married younger and have kids younger. I met many couples there who'd been together since high school or college. I'm sure there are unmarried women in their 30s, but I don't think there's a huge pool of never-married-no-kids straight single women in Memphis.

(But take my opinion with a grain of salt, because I'm a married woman with kids )

[AppalachianAngler]

Nashville actually crushes Memphis when it comes to single professional women. There are some singles out there around your age range in Memphis, but it is not nearly what you are reading about. There are only a few major employers in the city so it doesn't attract a huge population from outside the immediate area.

Memphians are friendly but some can be cliquey. It is thought of as a "big" small town--everyone knows everyone. That can be problematic for dating.

You will be real disappointed if you move to Cordova or Bartlett, IMO. The majority in both cities are married with kids, formerly married with kids, or never married with kids. You could of course drive in, but it limits your access on what you can do. For example, if you wanted to meet up and go to an NBA game at the FedEx Forum, which generally start at 7 or 7:30, between traffic and parking, it is a very good possibly you are late. Maybe this is just personal preference, but I like having easy access to the fun things, even if the price is slightly higher. It sounds like you value the social scene over "more room" in your original post.

You may want to look at East Memphis, including its western edge near the University of Memphis. As long as you avoid the real exclusive neighborhoods, that may be better for you and allows you closer access to downtown and midtown, and East Memphis still has some younger singles that you are looking for.

There is a new complex opening up near 3rd St/BB King and Carolina near South Main that is likely a lot cheaper than traditional South Main, I can't recall the name. I can't imagine S Main is anywhere close to S. Florida's COL (nor Nashville). I would look for a studio or 1 BR in S. Main though, if you are wanting to take advantage of the social scene.

Traffic is not bad in Memphis outside of rush hour or wrecks, especially compared to Nashville. Humidity is horrible here.

Anyways, not trying to discourage you, but I don't think Memphis is the place you are seeking other than traffic, cost of living.

[Al Joad]

Zero chance I'm moving back to Nashville. Aside from wanting to try another new city before settling down (I'm 35 so it's gotta happen sooner rather than later) I'm really just not a fan of what the city has become in the six years since I left.

In my online research I think I saw something about the new lofts on South Main that you mentioned. It seemed to me that there had to be some kind of catch. They were advertising brand new units, available in March, for like $600 a month for a 1BR. That's about half what an older unit with no dishwasher and no W/D is currently going for in the same area. Is this new project income restricted? Is it set up like a dorm with common bathrooms? It has to be something.

One more question, is there a strong Southern Baptist or evangelical vibe in Memphis? It was pretty prominent in Nashville, at least before the hipsters took over, and especially once you got into the suburbs like Franklin or Hendersonville. The first question people would ask you is "What church do you go to?" I'm a not-very-active Catholic and my identity is not tied up at all in church life or organized religion. Is Memphis (or its suburbs) a place where going to the "right" church affects social standing?

Thanks!

[knightrider162]

The evangelical vibe here isn't incredibly strong and there seems to be a pretty good mix of Catholics, Protestants, Jewish, and Muslims for the religious folks. I haven't gotten any weird feelings for being a less than active religious person myself. Similar to Nashville, you will get more of the evangelical feel in the suburbs. I am black and not originally from here so my perception might be a little different.

I am not sure what new development you are mentioning but that does sound too cheap. A good new building opening soon is the Tennessee Brewery project that starts at around 900 for a 1 BR.

[JoeCartpath]

Yes, church is a very big part of the lives of lots of people here....it is, after all, the bible belt. But...I can't even remember the last time someone asked me what church I attend. I suspect that is more common among older folks...but I'm almost 69! I don't attend church, but that hasn't affected my social standing. That's likely because I've never had any social standing