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Old 05-10-2011, 04:33 PM
 
Location: Kingsport
1 posts, read 930 times
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I was completely oblivious to my own symptoms!! I sware I used to lay in bed at night and think the whole world is mad crazy!! EVERY PERSON in My LIFE MY PARENTS MY CHILDREN MY EX HUSBAND MY NEW HUSBAND MY BROTHERS MY SISTERS ALL WERE FREAKING NUTTS!!!...then I could not take them for one more day....I went into therapy to figure out how to fix THEM and guess what the shrink told me??? She said i hAVE BiPOLAR i said OMG THE SHRINK IS NuttS TOO!!! So after 3 therapist and 2 phycologist guess what...I am bi-polar...I take my meds, go to therapy...everyone loves me now...trouble is now that I know I am nutts...and got help...I think man so and so is insane and needs a Dr
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Old 08-29-2011, 01:13 PM
 
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Default I understand John Nash, and his reply, I can't tell when I am manic, before I fall from my highs and end up depressed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
It's only one example, but in his later years, someone asked John Nash how someone as brilliant as he could have possibly believed that space aliens were contacting him. He said that the thoughts and voices came from the same place in his head that the math came from. The math was real, so why wouldn't the aliens also be real?

I guess there's a lot we've yet to learn about the human brain.
I understand John Nash, and his answer. I have been diagnosed with Bi-Polar 1 disorder since 1989, and to this day, I cannot tell what thoughts of mine are due to the illness, and which ones are valid and I should be accountable for. All of them appear correct to me. I can tell, when a mania is beginning, but usually in a few days time, the euphoria or distorted thinking is so extreme, I believe that I am perfectly fine, and everyone else must have some kind of problem. If your family does not understand the illness, and uses it to try to control or attack you and your actions, it becomes very troublesome to trust anyone else and their evaluation of your symptoms. It is after a manic phase, that it seems that I become more aware that I have once again, "made a mess out of my life" and didn't even realize that I was doing it. Depressions are extremely difficult to survive, but the understanding that I have depression is much easier for me to see, than when I am in a manic episode. I am very powerful during a manic episode, therefore do not receive constructive intervention. I have only once, ever allowed myself to be taken out of a manic episode, with medication and hospitalization, and that was only because I was having psychotic hallucinations along with the mania, and for me, that was not in my realm of what I could write off as, "reasonable". It is only after the destruction, of those amazing mania's that I, personally, begin to realize, I was in a mania, after all... and I try to correct my mistakes by complying with medication, only to get to the point another person posted, "Those darn Dr.'s do not know what they are doing, and they are making me more sick and incapable of living my life".. then I go off of my medication, which from hindsight, I can see, it doesn't take long for me to bounce back into a mania or even a mixed episode and the question is asked all over again, " Is this really mania, or isn't it just who I am, and what separates the two?" How will I ever know, when I am manic, before it is too late? For that, I do not have the answer, as with John Nash, I implore, the mania resides in the same mind that I believe my character and qualities reside.. how do you separate the two, and which ones are which?
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Old 08-31-2011, 08:01 AM
 
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I think it depends on what type of mental illness one has, the severity of the illness and the insight of the person. I think depression - yes, although I think there is cognitive distortion at work in depression. I think in bipolar, not as much and again - cognitive distortion at work and maybe less ability to trust in one's feelings and perceptions. I don't know about schizophrenia, as I've never really dealt with that population. I imagine there are degrees of insight but not sure. As to Alzheimers (which I'd lump in with mental illness after my Dad had it), there are moments of lucidity and moments of madness along the journey. At the end mostly madness that no drug can cure.
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Old 09-02-2011, 01:35 PM
Status: "It's OK to tell me "Merry Christmas"." (set 5 days ago)
 
Location: Outside 1604
1,624 posts, read 1,476,345 times
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And just what is being done to find out how our brains work or don't work right? Is there any research even being done on live mentally ill patients (scans, x-rays, etc). What about deceased mentally ill patients? Of course they would have to donate their brains to science, or their families would have to. My point is, what, if anything, is being researched to find answers/cures/fixes, etc. to help live mentally ill patients get better?

My own curiosity is those who "hear voices" telling them to do bad things. I cannot comprehend that because I just hear my own thoughts when I think. Could the "voices" actually be the persons own thoughts, and they don't have the skill or ability to know right from wrong, or to ignore the bad thoughts. Haven't we all thought at one time or another, "I could kill you for doing/saying that", but we don't act on it. This to me is a true mystery of the mind/brain.
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Old 09-05-2011, 07:40 AM
 
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Great Grandma - paranoid Schizophrenia, died at 101 years old and always insisted she was well. Of course she thought someone killed her husband and replaced them and the new man in house was responsible for the death of her husband. The "new man" in her house was her husband. lol. It always made me laugh.

Me - I have Bipolar II Disorder, Social Anxiety (goes with the Bipolar), Generalized Anxiety, OCD, ADHD, PTSD and dyslexia. I was wrongly diagnosed with unipolar depression in 1988 despite bouncing off the walls in the psych hospital for a month. No one figured it out that I really had Bipolar II, rapid cycling and sometimes mixed cycles, anxiety or anything else. My first therapist in 1988 treated me for PTSD, but completely missed everything else. The doctors in the hospital started me on OCD meds and anti-anxiety meds, but they never told me what the drugs were for. I was in dark as to what was happening to me. I found out in 2005 that I have Bipolar II. I saw 3 more doctors for more opinions and they all agreed. I got upset and saw 4 more doctors and they all agreed as well. I wanted to go into denial. My most recent doctor this year told me I have been ill with OCD, ADHD, Social Anxiety Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Bipolar II since I was a little girl. I picked up PTSD from growing up in an unstable, uncertain, extremely violent, volatile household and getting the cr*p beat out of me on a regular basis and living in fear I would be killed by my own family. I was very startled to reach the age of 18. I never thought it would happen. My therapist said my case of PTSD was so severe she had never seen anyone survive such a horrific life before and she had been practicing for over 20 years. She was horrified by what I told her and often brought to tears. Apparently the PTSD only served to make my Bipolar II and Anxiety Disorders worse.

I have Hypersexuality. Every boyfriend told me there was something wrong with me because my sexual appetite is voracious. I thought they were just lazy lovers, but really the problem was with me. I did not know that Hypersexuality is a sign you have Bipolar. I had no idea. No one told me. How could I know? I thought everyone wanted to have sex 5-8 times a day??? And that was a slow day. Shrug. To me it was normal. I didn't care what they said it was normal to me.

I have only sought treatment for my Bipolar Disorder II when the depression became so bad that I ended up in a psych hospital and another time in a state hospital on a 5150. Now that is a place you do not want to go. A state hospital is like "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" only worse. They tried to keep me for 2 years, but the judge told them, "Let her go. There is no probable cause." Thank god for probable cause or I would have a new address. At that point I knew something was really, really wrong so I sought treatment to avoid a return trip to the state hospital on another 5150. I DO NOT WANT TO LIVE THERE! That hospital had the biggest group of sadists in one room I have ever seen. Maybe it is a job requirement? "Must be a sadist to work here!"

My mom
has early onset Alzheimer's. I tried to talk to her about it and she about snapped my neck in two. Her mother and grandmother died of it so she is afraid and will not speak of it. My father told me I can say "mom and Alzheimer's" in the same breath.

My siblings have Bipolar, too.
I have talked to them. My sister is really suffering and agrees she has it, but refuses treatment. My brothers deny they are sick no matter how dysfunctional they are. My one brother has a daughter who is showing clear signs that she is in the beginning stages of developing Bipolar II. My brother will not hear of it that she is ill like me, the only one who has seen a doctor, gotten a diagnosis and is under a doctor's care. My brother refuses to believe he is ill and so is his kid. My other brother is completely checked out, orbiting the moon and not all well. He first saw a psychiatrist when he was 17 for 4 appointments and never went back. Now he refuses to see reason that he is ill. Both my brothers are delusional as hell. They think they are great intellectuals, rock gods, great actors, famous, great authors, screenwriters, etc. and can not understand why they are not recognized out in public. It is funny and sad at the same time. They frustrate me because they make fun of me for being in treatment and then they are incredibly sick themselves.

Do people deny they are ill? You bet. Why? Because they have been like that for a very long time and they think it is normal. How can you recognize you are ill when the illness settles in and takes residence? How can you tell? It is similar to how can you tell you have hardening of the arteries? You can't tell, but you have it nonetheless. It is like that.
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Old 09-05-2011, 08:12 AM
 
141 posts, read 242,750 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michigan Transplant View Post
And just what is being done to find out how our brains work or don't work right? Is there any research even being done on live mentally ill patients (scans, x-rays, etc). What about deceased mentally ill patients? Of course they would have to donate their brains to science, or their families would have to. My point is, what, if anything, is being researched to find answers/cures/fixes, etc. to help live mentally ill patients get better?

My own curiosity is those who "hear voices" telling them to do bad things. I cannot comprehend that because I just hear my own thoughts when I think. Could the "voices" actually be the persons own thoughts, and they don't have the skill or ability to know right from wrong, or to ignore the bad thoughts. Haven't we all thought at one time or another, "I could kill you for doing/saying that", but we don't act on it. This to me is a true mystery of the mind/brain.
If you want to know the latest studies on mental illness you can check two locations: the NIMH website and the CDC website. Most of the research is on the NIMH website, but there is some original research on the CDC website. You can donate your brain to a number of organizations looking for a cure to a number of physical and mental illnesses such as: Parkinson's, Dystonia, Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, Alzheimer's and more. They need both healthy and diseased brains so they can compare the two. You have to put this in your "Living Will" or "Advanced Directive" and give copies to your family, family doctor, spouse and leave a copy where it can be found easily in the event of your death. Brain donation is a very selfless thing to do. I have donated mine.

People who hear voices have Schizophrenia and are experiencing auditory hallucinations. No, they are NOTHING like your own thoughts. You are funny to think that! You make me laugh. That is so naive. The voices are a distinct other personality and can be either male or female. I knew someone who had a woman in a red dress direct him around and that woman in the red dress was really quite pushy. She would never let up until he did what she told him to do. She was an insistent nag and quite the b*tch. When she spoke to him she seemed to be outside of him and floating off the ground, wearing a scarlet, floor length red dress.

I've known other Schizophrenic people who heard voices inside the head. One thought he was Batman and Catwoman was after him. He went to SaveOn Pharmacy and climbed the shelves at the store screaming that Catwoman was after him and he was trying to escape. He was off his meds and that is why he did that. I could tell he had gone off his meds because I could see it in his eyes. The eyes of a person with Schizophrenia will flutter from side to side and they have no control over this. As the fluttering grows worse you know they have become more ill and are off their meds.

When my hypomania grows bad I hear voices in my head, but I know they are voices and my meds are not balanced. I call my doctor to get my meds tweaked. I know I am hallucinating and not well. Usually this happens when I have no slept for 5 days or more. Anyone who stays up longer than 3 days will hallucinate. This is well documented since the 1940s when the US Army did experiments on soldiers for sleep deprivation as a tactic to be used on enemy combatants during interrogation. These studies on sleep deprivation are readily available and very interesting.

The longer you stay up the more and harder you hallucinate. This is when people who have Bipolar end up locked up. We stay up 5 days, 10 days, etc. and hallucinate hard. At that point the Bipolar patient needs a strong sedative shot to go down for sleep. Sleep for a couple of days restores the balance in the mind. A friend of mine stayed up for 10 days and thought he could walk through walls, find the center of the universe, time travel, step through the vortex of the universe, etc. He came to his senses after he was heavily sedated and slept for 3 days. The cops picked him up and took him to the hospital because he was being disruptive and his neighbors complained about his loud shouting. It was not funny at the time, but it is funny now. You have to find the humor in it or otherwise it is too sad for words what he went through.

There are different kinds of hallucinations: auditory (you hear voices, sounds, music, etc. that is not there), visual (you see things that are not there people, demons, animals, etc.), odor (you smell scents that are not present, flowers, food, aftershave, etc.). We can hallucinate for all 5 of our sense, but what I listed is the most common ones. When I have auditory hallucinations I hear of lot my mom calling my name and it can wake from a sleep. I hear my dead ex-husband calling to me. My ex has been dead for 4 years. I hear him as if he is alive and in the house with me. It is creepy, freaky weird. I hate it. I have to remind myself, "He is dead. He is dead. He is dead and cremated. It isn't possible for him to be here. Call your doctor in the morning. Must tweak meds!"

Does that explain how and why it is not your own voice you hear in your head? It is other people live or dead, mythical or real that you hear in your head. It is NOT your own thoughts. If only I could be so lucky to ONLY hear my own thoughts. I am envious of you. The voices can get stuck on a loop and begin repeating themselves. They will NOT stop until I sleep and I need really strong meds to make that happen. I have taken enough sleeping pills to put down an elephant and my hypomania makes me stay awake. I have to take sedatives instead and in heavy doses to make me sleep. I took my meds tonight, but they did not work. I have no slept in a day and a half, but that is not bad so I am not worried. Now I need to double the sedative so I can sleep Mon night since I skipped Sun night. I do not feel tired at all since I am hypomanic at the moment. I have been sleeping every other night and feeling well rested. I think sleep every other night is not bad. I am not going 5 days straight with no sleep, so it is OK for now.
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Old 09-05-2011, 08:37 AM
 
141 posts, read 242,750 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
In my experience working as an ED RN and in Mental Health many years ago, most people do have an awareness of their mental health issues.

The only people who don't are those in an acute manic phase or an acute psychosis.

There are exceptions but the people who come to the ED generally say they are feeling 'unwell' 'not right', or whatever.

If you think you have a mental illness you need to see your PCP who will refer you to a Psychiatrist. A Psychiatrist will do whatever they do and hopefully diagnose you then start with cognitive therapy and/or medication.
I beg to differ. I was hospitalized twice and still did not know what was wrong with me. Once in a private hospital that was nice and like a spa and once on a 5150 in the state hospital that was really grim and terrible. Neither time did anyone say to me a diagnosis. I was given pills stacked up to ceiling, but no one knew I had Bipolar Disorder II. I had to see a private psychiatrist to get those answers.

I went to the therapist due to PTSD flashbacks and suicidal ideation, but I did not know I had PTSD or Bipolar. I just wanted relief from the flashbacks and the constant urge to kill myself. I wanted to get away from the flashbacks and relief from the suicidal ideation. Did I know something was wrong with me? No. I thought I just had stress and regular depression. I did not know I had "clinical level depression." I didn't know any of the vocabulary that was used to classify me, refer to me, categorize me, explain to me the illness, etc. I had no idea what was going on. I was completely lost and remain lost to some extent.

I have had to educate myself on my various illnesses because no doctor or therapist has done a decent job of explaining to me what is wrong with me and what I need to do to recover. They just get on with it talking about the meds or that therapy session that day. I am not given the information or tools I need to understand my illnesses. I have had to do the research on my own and help myself on my own. I am unimpressed with doctors and therapists after being in treatment off and on since 1988.

It was only this year that my most recent doctor explained to me why it is necessary for me to stay on meds and not go off of them simply because I feel better. Ohhhhhhhh, now I get it! It was a light bulb moment. No one had told me before! How could I know? Garbage in, garbage out. What can I say? Bad info begets bad decisions.
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Old 09-05-2011, 11:45 AM
JL
 
Location: Houston, TX
6,385 posts, read 7,028,732 times
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This just came out today.

Nearly 40 percent of Europeans suffer mental illness - Yahoo! News (http://news.yahoo.com/nearly-40-pct-europeans-suffer-mental-illness-230827577.html - broken link)
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Old 09-05-2011, 02:32 PM
 
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Originally Posted by JL View Post
This just came out today.

Nearly 40 percent of Europeans suffer mental illness - Yahoo! News (http://news.yahoo.com/nearly-40-pct-europeans-suffer-mental-illness-230827577.html - broken link)
That is disturbing. 20% of all Americans have a "Mood Disorder" now that statistic is staggering. A mood disorder is massive depression / unipolar depression / clinical depression or whatever you want to call it - and - Bipolar Disorder.
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