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People who have not dealt with depression just don't get it. They think that we can "talk ourselves out of it" or that we are weak people; that if we just exercised, meditated, ate only healthy food, [insert whatever] that we could get better. If it was that easy nobody would be depressed. When I have gone through bad episodes even the thought of somebody handing me a million dollars doesn't help.
Thankfully, the last few days have been a little better. But what's so annoying to me is the slightest little thing can start the sadness. I remember being in a normal mood one day and I'm in my car waiting at a red traffic light. This little old lady, all hunched over was crossing the street with her walker and I looked at her and thought "oh, my, this is going to be me one day". Something as innocuous as that can change my whole mood.
I had one psychiatrist that told me I had a form of bipolar, not the manic phase but a normal phase and a depressed phase. However I don't think she was correct as my "normal" phase is still not normal. I rarely feel joy and I don't enjoy being around people much. Right now I am getting some enjoyment out of my butterfly garden and I love hearing the birds singing. I'm trying to force myself to do something to break the monotony so when my sister invited me to the beach today for lunch I accepted although my first inclination was to say no.
Anyway that are my thoughts for today. Thank you all for posting and for this thread.
Last edited by chiluvr1228; 06-02-2018 at 07:20 AM..
Umkay. It is your thread, and I promise to never post in it again.
Ciao.
It's not my thread....if you want to post read the thread. There is someone on here with occasional suicidal thoughts. That poster needs incredible support, not fluff about gratitude crap and certainly nothing that insinuates we are victims.
People who have not dealt with depression just don't get it. They think that we can "talk ourselves out of it" or that we are weak people; that if we just exercised, meditated, ate only healthy food, [insert whatever] that we could get better. If it was that easy nobody would be depressed. When I have gone through bad episodes even the thought of somebody handing me a million dollars doesn't help.
Thankfully, the last few days have been a little better. But what's so annoying to me is the slightest little thing can start the sadness. I remember being in a normal mood one day and I'm in my car waiting at a red traffic light. This little old lady, all hunched over was crossing the street with her walker and I looked at her and thought "oh, my, this is going to be me one day". Something as innocuous as that can change my whole mood.
I had one psychiatrist that told me I had a form of bipolar, not the manic phase but a normal phase and a depressed phase. However I don't think she was correct as my "normal" phase is still not normal. I rarely feel joy and I don't enjoy being around people much. Right now I am getting some enjoyment out of my butterfly garden and I love hearing the birds singing. I'm trying to force myself to do something to break the monotony so when my sister invited me to the beach today for lunch I accepted although my first inclination was to say no.
Anyway that are my thoughts for today. Thank you all for posting and for this thread.
Morning chiluver! Good to hear you're enjoying the butterflies and the beach....keep pushing to do a few things each day....
Bipolar II was also mentioned to me....I don't think they mean the phase other than depression is exactly normal, but just not as manic as bipolar I....at least that's my understanding. My psych said it's very hard to differentiate at times between some diagnoses, as they can share so many traits similar. We decided to treat the symptoms and not focus so much on diagnosis. Seems to work.
My son had a form of bipolar too and I seem to as well. If there is some degree of anxiety involved it is possible that there is deficiency of gamma-amino butyric acid in the brain. This can be treated by use of L-Theanine supplement. It does work. I take that and 5-HTP. I gave up on prozac because it impairs me in other critical areas.
With ADD or hyperactivity, the same gamma-amino butyric acid (GABA) deficiency may be at play although it has been suggested that dopamine deficiency may play a role. That's why Ritalin is prescribed for kids with ADD.
Apparently, with a GABA deficiency, the moods tend to swing with or without stimulus.
Anyway, I have found that stimulants like chocolate and caffeine have a negative effect on my moods, to the extent of making me feel suicidal so I avoid them like the plague. My son was prescribed Ritalin and he said it made him feel depressed.
My son had a form of bipolar too and I seem to as well. If there is some degree of anxiety involved it is possible that there is deficiency of gamma-amino butyric acid in the brain. This can be treated by use of L-Theanine supplement. It does work. I take that and 5-HTP. I gave up on prozac because it impairs me in other critical areas.
With ADD or hyperactivity, the same gamma-amino butyric acid (GABA) deficiency may be at play although it has been suggested that dopamine deficiency may play a role. That's why Ritalin is prescribed for kids with ADD.
Apparently, with a GABA deficiency, the moods tend to swing with or without stimulus.
Anyway, I have found that stimulants like chocolate and caffeine have a negative effect on my moods, to the extent of making me feel suicidal so I avoid them like the plague. My son was prescribed Ritalin and he said it made him feel depressed.
Good for you and your work on finding supplements that help. I do as well and took Prozac when it first came out in early 90's and it left me flat. Instead of 5HTP I found tryptophan works better for me.
A friend likes L Theanine and I like Inositol, Gaba and some others...good to know we can try many other remedies.
Morning chiluver! Good to hear you're enjoying the butterflies and the beach....keep pushing to do a few things each day....
Bipolar II was also mentioned to me....I don't think they mean the phase other than depression is exactly normal, but just not as manic as bipolar I....at least that's my understanding. My psych said it's very hard to differentiate at times between some diagnoses, as they can share so many traits similar. We decided to treat the symptoms and not focus so much on diagnosis. Seems to work.
Hypomanic episodes are required to have a diagnosis of Bipolar II. Otherwise it's unipolar depression or dysthymia.
Dysthymia is the one mentioned the most throughout the years. As for GABA I tried it and it made me worse. Part of that could be because I take Lorazepam but to get off of it after so many years is going to require medical care.
Since I also have fibromyalgia I don't absorb many meds correctly. Neither does my sister. If I take a pain pill it leaves me unable to sleep where a lot of people find it makes them sleepy. Hopefully I will get some answers this week.
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