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Old 03-11-2009, 07:36 AM
 
Location: Pa
19,815 posts, read 10,766,982 times
Reputation: 6122
Quote:
Originally Posted by leatherhead View Post
Ever hear the saying Cheaters never prosper? You married an illegal. He was an illegal by choice. There are consequences for breaking laws, and I am glad for it. Next time choose a spouse more wisely. This is a self inflicted burden I truely feel bad for your kids. Its not there fault daddy is a criminal and mom hooked up with him. Have fun in Mexico.
It is a self inflicted burden. Who here can claim to have never screwed up? Certainly not you Leather. This we both know. The fact is due to his mother he really has no right to complain or ask for special consideration. Compounded by the fact he continued to live a life as an illegal. The woman in question as well as the illegal tried to come clean and make things right.Give them credit for that Leather. Unfortunately just with other crimes there are consequences. As well there should be. The man owes his woes to his mother. Her motivation is not at all relevant raggedy because at the end of the day she is no less an illegal for it. As leather said the children are the true victims in this. The adults had a say and free will the kids did not.
Living in Mexico doesn't have to be a bad thing. I love Thailand even though some consider it a 3rd world country. They may even be happier there. At any rate I wish them well.
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Old 03-28-2009, 01:06 PM
 
2 posts, read 6,229 times
Reputation: 11
Default I have been there

I just got back from living in Cuautla for 6 months. I am in the exact same position as you but I have 3 young daughters. I can tell you I will be going back in 3 months to live in Cuautla until my husband can come back to the US. It is beautiful and calm there and hey if we are both there we can use eachother as a support system as there are not many people there who speak English.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sanchezfrank View Post
Hello, I just returned from Mexico today after traveling to Juarez with my husband. He had an appointment with the U.S. Consulate there, and we paid thousands of dollars in legal fees in order to "do everything right." But to no avail. He was told that he has to stay in Mexico for 10 years, despite his American wife and son.

We decided that the first step for me is to look into getting Mexican residency. I know that there exists an FM-2 and an FM-3. I don't know which would be better or more attainable for me. I am interested in any information on the subject. (BTW, our son already has dual citizenship, something his father took care of when he was born so that there would never be a problem with his living there...so I don't need a visa for him). I understand that getting Mexican residency is no cakewalk.

Also, I read in these forums quite a lot about relocating to Mexico, but the cities which my husband thinks is are good choices for us were not mentioned. Those cities are Cuautla and Cuernavaca, Morelos. My husband says the weather there is beautiful and there is access to some American restaurants and even a Wal-Mart. Does anyone know about these cities or has lived there? I have returned to the States in order to sell everything we have here and let our son finish out his school year, and due to lack of funds (we're broke from paying immigration, what a total waste of money!) I won't be able to travel there again until it's time to move. I have no idea what kind of home we will be able to afford until I have sold what few assets we have here, and I know that life will be very different.

I wrote this to get information, by the way, not to be attacked by anti-illegal immigration posters. If you want to know why he was denied a visa, he was brought to the US illegally by his mother when he was a child. When he grew up, he returned to Mexico to visit his sick, elderly father (he's the youngest of eight) and then returned to the U.S. illegally to continue raising his son. (I said "our" son, but he is my stepson, born to my husband and a U.S. citizen girlfriend when my husband was seventeen years old and she was twenty-three. She abandoned her baby one year later and has shown no interest in caring for him since. No one knows where she is. He is now twelve years old, and my husband has raised him alone until he married me. So this proves that he did not marry me just to get a green card...the mother of his child was a citizen and they did not marry).

Of course now he deeply regrets having crossed the border illegally of his own volition (the first time was rather obviously not his fault) because it has cost us everything we have here in the U.S. At that time he was still very young and foolish, and simply followed the example of the rest of his family. That is not an excuse, but it is an explanation. So he was told that he does not qualify for a waiver and is subject to the 10-year bar. We were shocked because our lawyer said that since he was never arrested, deported or had any problems and even paid his taxes, he would qualify for the waiver. When he came out of the consulate and told me what happened, he was sobbing and kept begging my forgiveness, knowing that either we would be separated for a decade or I would be separated from my own family and country for that amount of time, possibly living in difficult conditions -- and that only if I was able to obtain permission to live in Mexico.

I am hoping against hope that that will not happen and that I can live with him there without starving or suffering, but any information on those cities and also on the visas would be welcome. Any opinions as to my husband's deserving the punishment he got are not welcome. It is my punishment as well, and our child's, and we have done nothing wrong.
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Old 03-28-2009, 01:07 PM
 
2 posts, read 6,229 times
Reputation: 11
My name is Jill send me an e-mail and we can get in contact with eachother. As I said before I am will be moving back to Cuautla in about 3 months with my husdand and 3 daughters. Mod edit: personal info removed

Last edited by Travelling fella; 04-01-2009 at 06:14 PM..
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Old 04-01-2009, 03:55 PM
 
1 posts, read 3,078 times
Reputation: 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by tinman01 View Post
It is a self inflicted burden. Who here can claim to have never screwed up? Certainly not you Leather. This we both know. The fact is due to his mother he really has no right to complain or ask for special consideration. Compounded by the fact he continued to live a life as an illegal. The woman in question as well as the illegal tried to come clean and make things right.Give them credit for that Leather. Unfortunately just with other crimes there are consequences. As well there should be. The man owes his woes to his mother. Her motivation is not at all relevant raggedy because at the end of the day she is no less an illegal for it. As leather said the children are the true victims in this. The adults had a say and free will the kids did not.
Living in Mexico doesn't have to be a bad thing. I love Thailand even though some consider it a 3rd world country. They may even be happier there. At any rate I wish them well.
Mod edit: personal attack has America taken out a patent on nastiness? could you honestly tell us that you have never broken any law.leather go learn a trade and keep your unsavory opinions to yourself

Last edited by Travelling fella; 04-01-2009 at 06:14 PM..
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Old 04-01-2009, 08:45 PM
 
Location: Pa
19,815 posts, read 10,766,982 times
Reputation: 6122
Quote:
Originally Posted by elizabeth pestaina View Post
Mod edit: personal attack has America taken out a patent on nastiness? could you honestly tell us that you have never broken any law.leather go learn a trade and keep your unsavory opinions to yourself
I can tell you that I have never trespassed upon my neighbor. I can also say that what laws I broke I paid my fines and tried not break them again. Those would be speeding tickets. I never tried to dodge accountability or responsibility. As I said before I feel for the children in such cases because they are innocent and had no choices. Adults have choices and often make bad choices. That free will clause adam and eve saddled us with..
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Old 07-05-2010, 12:33 PM
 
4 posts, read 6,460 times
Reputation: 13
I'm sitting here in my neighborhood library tying to figure out what to do and stumbled upon this site....
I have read practically every thread and in doing so have related to most.... So, I had hoped I could ask for advice and be able to get some that would not attack me for my being human.
So here it goes......

I met my fiancee over 5 years ago after two marriages and the last being abusive and too long. I am an American citizen born and raised but my fiancee is a Mexican citizen who came here legally but ended up overstaying his visa by 17 years.

There is a long story as to why he came and why he over stayed. Anyway, he signed a voluntary deportation and was sent back to Mexico where he is now.

He is a good man and has designing skills and programming abilities so he is well educated. He does not want to go back illegal and knows he made mistakes that got us to where we are now but wants to right them.
Here is the thing, I have been living in Mexico for two and a half years with a visitors visa waiting to see if he can come back. We tried a lawyer for a fiancee visa at first and that is how we found out he was still married after almost 15 years.

We have been living but not easily in Mexico. No one wants to hire him for what he is educated for because he is over 40.

I have come back to the U.S. in hopes to get him back but talked to a lawyer (who seems sincere) that said he has been banned for 10 years and for me to go back and marry him.

If anyone has any idea what I should do please tell me.

I love him so much and I truly believe he is my only one.....
I cannot accept that we have to live apart for so long.
Thank you for your time.

P.S. I guess what I'm asking is really should I go and try to make a living there or stay and try to make a living here until he can come back.

What I want is to go.....now. That's how much I love him...I'm sure everyone that is in my shoes feel the same.

Last edited by chellerides; 07-05-2010 at 01:14 PM..
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Old 07-06-2010, 03:21 PM
 
3,545 posts, read 3,983,407 times
Reputation: 2300
Quote:
Originally Posted by chellerides View Post
I'm sitting here in my neighborhood library tying to figure out what to do and stumbled upon this site....
I have read practically every thread and in doing so have related to most.... So, I had hoped I could ask for advice and be able to get some that would not attack me for my being human.
So here it goes......

I met my fiancee over 5 years ago after two marriages and the last being abusive and too long. I am an American citizen born and raised but my fiancee is a Mexican citizen who came here legally but ended up overstaying his visa by 17 years.

There is a long story as to why he came and why he over stayed. Anyway, he signed a voluntary deportation and was sent back to Mexico where he is now.

He is a good man and has designing skills and programming abilities so he is well educated. He does not want to go back illegal and knows he made mistakes that got us to where we are now but wants to right them.
Here is the thing, I have been living in Mexico for two and a half years with a visitors visa waiting to see if he can come back. We tried a lawyer for a fiancee visa at first and that is how we found out he was still married after almost 15 years.

We have been living but not easily in Mexico. No one wants to hire him for what he is educated for because he is over 40.

I have come back to the U.S. in hopes to get him back but talked to a lawyer (who seems sincere) that said he has been banned for 10 years and for me to go back and marry him.

If anyone has any idea what I should do please tell me.

I love him so much and I truly believe he is my only one.....
I cannot accept that we have to live apart for so long.
Thank you for your time.

P.S. I guess what I'm asking is really should I go and try to make a living there or stay and try to make a living here until he can come back.

What I want is to go.....now. That's how much I love him...I'm sure everyone that is in my shoes feel the same.
The 10 year rule is not bendable. If you marry him know in your head today you will have 10 years from the day he was deported to have even a chance of a return, but even then the could still deny him. My wife works in immigration law in the US and says the only real exceptions come from asylum cases and he has no chance of that unless he was something like the police chief of Juarez. In their office's experience, most families who don't go the route of having the spouse live illegally in the US try to make a go of it in Mexico but the breakup rate is scary high. Its almost always American women going to live with Mexican men and culturally ingrained issues start causing big problems. The best results they know of are couples that live along the border during the time, with the spouse working on the US side and having the kids attend school in the US, but residing in Mexico. However during these times its quite understandable few want to live in places like Tijuana or Juarez.
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Old 07-08-2010, 11:05 AM
 
1 posts, read 2,489 times
Reputation: 10
Hi,
My husband is from Cuernavaca and we have been all over the country and I think this is one of the best places for americans to live in mexico. There is an english newspaper and an english club, english churches and many private schools that are good! You can teach at one and then he can go to school for free. Puebla is a nice city too, with lots of options! I lived in Cuerna for 2 years with him. Now I am here and he is there and we are trying to decide what to do. Seperate and I stay here or me go back there? It is such a hard move. I have a lot of student loans and I have 5 years of college and I need to almost work here. So we shall see, I am not sure what to do. But email me if you want more info on cuerna and I have friends down there that I could hook you up with for friends. But here my email: almays06@hotmail.com so shoot me an email and I will tell you where to get an apt that you can view online and jobs and so on. Good luck and send me an email and I will tell you everything! You will be fine, there is a 2 chili's, 2 malls, walmart, costco, sam's club, all fast food rest that are american, tons of other shops you will be fine! Tons of water parks and so on!!

Good luck
Abby
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Old 07-08-2010, 11:59 AM
 
Location: Saltillo, Coahuila
1 posts, read 2,484 times
Reputation: 10
I'm living in Mexico myself (Saltillo, just south of Texas). If you want, check out my blog: www.meximamma.blogspot.com. It's got links to other bloggers who have been in your situation, too.

If you can afford it, go for the FM2 visa, as you'll be on your way to permanent residency 5 years earlier. It's a little more expensive up front, but more than makes up the difference by axing 5 years off the process. Either visa should be easy to alter to include employment, once you find an employer.

I lived in Morelos for 2 years, and have friends that are still there, so if you want, I should be able to get you information on both Cuernavaca and Cuautla (my compadre lives by Cuautla).

As I just joined this forum and am not sure how it works, feel free to email me at jilldouglas01@hotmail.com, if I don't respond through this forum (but do have patience, as I don't have much internet access this month).

Good luck!
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Old 07-08-2010, 11:05 PM
 
3,073 posts, read 4,217,196 times
Reputation: 1535
Oh the story makes me sob also... I think someone needs to call the FBI
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