You know you're from Miami when... (Hialeah, Palmetto: salons, real estate, houses)

[Think (Freedom)]

I saw this in the Arizona forum and found the one for Miami cause I thought they were pretty funny (and very true)


You know you're from Miami when...


you call flip-flops chancletas

you wear chancletas EVERYWHERE

you live 15 minutes from the beach, but you never go

the car behind you honks their horn because you stopped at a red light

you get mad if the DJ doesn't play salsa, meringue, bachata, or reggaeton at a party

you buy your party food at Blue Sky

you refer to your hometown as 305 or MIA

you know you can't get a job without speaking Spanish

you know you can't really get anywhere without speaking Spanish

you only go to a Marlins, Heat, or Dolphins game if they're on a winning streak

you instinctively buy gallons of water during hurricane season, just in case

you hope for a hurricane to come so you don't have to go to work/school

you know only tourists go clubbing on South Beach

you spend your summer days inside cuz it's hot as hell outside...literally

you're so used to craziness that very few things surprise you anymore

you want to move out of Miami some day, but you say you'll come back

you know never to buy mangoes or avocados at a grocery store cuz u grow them in your backyard

you go to a store/business and the manager tells you "hablas espanol?" cuz they barely can speak english

you know your pastelitos (heck yeah!)

you know that Argentineans make the best steak for the best prices

you bump into Trick Daddy everywhere

you know to be out of Downtown by 6 pm

you have to wait 4 hours for a bus to come that's supposed to come by ever y 30 minutes

it's 60 degrees outside and you wear a sweater, a jacket, gloves, a scarf, a hat, and boots

you know the only time there's no traffic on the Palmetto is from 3-4am

you know at least one person who has more than six people living in their houses

your neighbor keeps chickens and goats in their back yard, and you're always worried you'll find one of them dead on your doorstep

you know the only hills are trash hills

the only rivers you've seen are the Miami River and canals

you know any woman walking around after dark on Flagler or Biscayne is a prostitute

you own a guayabera or know what one is

you take your car to go one block down the street

you buy mamoncillos & limes while waiting in traffic

a light lunch consists of chicharrones and malta Hatuey

you see a sushi bar on every corner

you get your chicken from Pollo Tropical

your shrimp, lobster, and designer purses all come from one place: some guy's trunk in Hialeah

you see girls wearing clubbing clothes to go to 7-11

there's a navarro on every corner

you have to put on the invitations "starts at 2:30pm " when the event really starts at 3:30pm just so people actually get there on time. (lol you know thats true)

[Dro420]

A lot of that **** is true. lol

[grew-up-3rd-culture]

I like the Hialeah trunk one.

[MiamiRob]

lmao! a lot of that is true! great post!

[blackklight]

Originally Posted by grew-up-3rd-culture

I like the Hialeah trunk one.

no kidding i always see people selling shrimp by advance auto parts

[rose.pal]

so funny and so true!!

[Chelito23]

What about churro vendors??? And getting yelled at if you forget to turn your wipers off at a drive thru or toll booth? LOL. That is also how you know you are in MIAMI!

[Lingonberry]

That is so great! The chancletas is so true!

I call them "chanks"!

Here's some I thought of:

You smoke Broncos.

You see Blackstone calling cards everywhere.

The only Asians you see are at Asian restaurants and acrylic nail salons

You "make the line" and "broom the floor"

You have helped someone in a grocery store who didn't speak English/didn't speak Spanish

People are lined up outside a bank one hour before it opens

You knew what a Chonga was before the song

If you are white, non Hispanic you are always asked "where are you from?"

You know what a Cuban mop, pim pam pooom, and jumping the broom are

You know what the Miami accent is

The newscasters have the Miami accent

You see a CD hanging in a rear-view mirror

You run away when someone is sweeping near your feet

Anyone have any more?

Peace

Lingonberry

[Think (Freedom)]

You know what a Cuban mop, pim pam pooom, and jumping the broom are

lmao! Yup definitely. Good ones

[rnc2mbfl]

You know you live in SouthBeach when:

1. The Publics closes at 11PM but you can buy Italian shoes after midnight
2. You can seriously consider the early bird dinner special for lunch
3. You have a basket on the front of your bike and you don't care what people think
4. People say good morning to you at 1:00 in the afternoon.
5. You consider a $7.00 well drink "inexpensive".
6. You wear a sweater and eat dinner under a heater because it's 65 degrees
7. A drag queen won't turn your head but you stare and point at the tourists beacuse they are wearing shorts at night.
8. The men's underwear section is the first thing you see when you walk into the front door of Macy's.
9. Eating dinner at 9:00 PM seems early
10. You go to the movies in the Summer to simply cool off.
11. The only time you see the sun rise is when you are coming home from a club.
12. The straight guys are fussier about their appearance than the gay guys.
13. You see a tip jar at a Walgreens or McDonald's
14. Being a "professional" means you sell real estate.
15. You complain about the place all the time yet you won't move.
15. You are happy to leave home for a while and even happier when you return.