Leaving Michigan (relocating, home, rent)

[mimberly]

My husband just took a job in Minnesota and he will leave this week and I and the kids will leave in June. I know from reading the postings that like us many have had to leave the state and takes jobs eleswhere to make it. I just feel so sad about leaving as this is the only place I have ever lived. I also have three older children that are on their own and I think that is bother me more than anything knowing that I won't see them as much. We also have 4 younger kids still at home. If anyone has any good ideas how they dealt with moving or how to keep family ties strong even though everyone isn't in the same state please share.

[jaynarie]

I moved to NC to teach (all by myself) and my family lives in MI. I NEVER thought I would be the person that moved- I grew up wanting to live and teach in the town I grew up in. So, after a couple of years of working 70+ work weeks to pay the student loan bills, I had enough. I thought I would have a very hard time with it, but it has been 8 months and I only cried twice after the day I actually drove down. The first time was when my parents left to go back to MI after helping me get settled and the second was at the airport coming home after Christmas (Thanksgiving didn't bother me, but Christmas did- it was weird). So, what I am trying to say is that it will not be as bad as you think.
As for keeping in touch:
I talk to my mom multiple times every day. My sister and dad less, but that was normal when I lived in MI.
I e-mail a lot of non-immediate friends/family to keep up with them.
My mom and I will play games together (usually Yahoo Gin). For a while my sister was getting mad saying we spent more time together now than when I lived at home She was jealous!
I come home as much as I can. As a teacher, I can't just take a vacation. But, I've been home 4 times: Labor Day weekend (Dad's 50th B-day), Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter.
They come to me as much as they can. Mom and step dad have been twice (and will be here again in 2 weeks), dad once.

I think you will not find it as difficult as you expect. I didn't anyway. Good luck!

[mostie]

Mimberly, I moved to MI from Cali almost 2 years ago, the only one with me at the time being my youngest son who is 12- I have grown kids, and a 13 year old who lives with her dad in Cali, and it's been hard, because the rest of them are all in Cali too- recently, my daughter, SIL, and grandsons moved here to MI (thank heavens....got them here, now in my evil plan, all I have to do is get the rest of them to move!- Bwahahahaaa! lol)--the one thing that I do have, is comcast, so I can call cali anytime, all day & night (which I actually do, several times a day)- send emails, etc.- it isn't like being there, but it's the next best thing- and it helps- either way, it's not easy- grown kids or not- but...this is the world we live in~

[mostie]

Now that I think about it...calling often really does help- if you only do it once a week, and then do the 'catching up' thing, it still feels...well, like what it is: far away--but I will call just to say, 'so....what are you doing, where are you going, who are you with?' (typical mom behavior, no matter HOW old they are, lol)--it feels more like I'm just calling out of the blue, like I would if I were there-

[malamute]

Originally Posted by mimberly

My husband just took a job in Minnesota and he will leave this week and I and the kids will leave in June. I know from reading the postings that like us many have had to leave the state and takes jobs eleswhere to make it. I just feel so sad about leaving as this is the only place I have ever lived. I also have three older children that are on their own and I think that is bother me more than anything knowing that I won't see them as much. We also have 4 younger kids still at home. If anyone has any good ideas how they dealt with moving or how to keep family ties strong even though everyone isn't in the same state please share.

Spend vacations together.

Living within a few miles of each other often doesn't bring people all that close because they're often busy with work and school activities. You might run into each other more often, but I know growing up, we were closer in some ways with cousins from another state because they came up for vacations and we spent time boating, fishing, camping out, hiking, or traveled together to other places, and some of the others who lived close by we weren't nearly as close with because we might have seen them fairly often but not at the same level.

[DestinationSeattle]

Phone calls, e-mails, and occasional trips back home to see each other all help. My wife and I always try to get home at Thanksgiving.

It's not easy when one place is all you've ever known, but you do get used to it. I left MI after living there all my life to take a job in metro DC. But I'd still be back home if my job hadn't gone away.

[deslok]

Being tied to one place is not the best way to live. There are so many other types of people, things, foods in other parts of the country, or other countries for that matter. You will be better off.

[jdlarocque]

My husband and I are in the process of relocating to Virginia. He left in the beginning of March and the kids and I will be going this summer. It has been hard but the daily phone calls help a lot. He has 4 older children that will still be here in Michigan and it made our decision to move even harder. But you have to do what is best for your family. You are only moving to Minnesota and its beautiful there. And really not that far. I wish you the best of luck with your new path.

[mimberly]

Your situation sounds very much like ours only I we have three grown children that will stay in MIchigan as they are on their own.