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Old 12-15-2009, 06:54 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma(formerly SoCalif) Originally Mich,
13,387 posts, read 9,606,825 times
Reputation: 4611
Default Jeff Foxworthy picks on Michigan

Part1
Are you aware that Jeff Foxworthy is now picking on Michigan?

Read on. (pretty funny and extremely accurate)


1. If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice
and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Michigan.

2. If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Michigan.

3. If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Michigan.

4. If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Michigan.

5. If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Michigan.

6. If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Michigan.

7. If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live in Michigan.

8. If your town has an equal number of bars and churches,
you might live in Michigan.

9. If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Michigan.
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Old 12-15-2009, 06:56 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma(formerly SoCalif) Originally Mich,
13,387 posts, read 9,606,825 times
Reputation: 4611
Part 2 -

"You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when" . . .


1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard without flinching.

6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.

9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

15. Down South to you means Ohio.

16. A brat is something you eat.

17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.

18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.

19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."

22. You drink pop and bake with soda.

23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not medicine.

24. You can actually drink Vernors without coughing.

25. You know what a Yooper is.

26. You think owning a Honda is Un-American.

27. You know that UP is a place, not a direction.

28. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.

29. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the best thing
to wear is a Kevlar vest.

30. You actually understand these jokes,
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Old 12-15-2009, 08:11 PM
 
Location: Mid-Town
7,553 posts, read 10,000,452 times
Reputation: 5189
cold..very very cold...
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Old 12-15-2009, 10:16 PM
 
Location: Michigan--good on the rocks
2,544 posts, read 2,067,408 times
Reputation: 1887
31. You associate someone calling you a "Troll," not with the internet, but with living south of the bridge.
32. You know what "the bridge" is.
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Old 12-16-2009, 07:18 AM
YAZ
 
Location: Phoenix,AZ
6,131 posts, read 6,486,041 times
Reputation: 4368
You go to the "party store" to stock up on booze Christmas Eve.

You know what a "two line pass" is and that "icing" isn't always a good thing.

You own at least one bowling shirt.

The "Big House" is a fun place to be.

You hear on the radio that school is canceled due to fog.

You know the difference between a "Rapala" and a "Daredevile".

Racoons and possums are nothing more than speedbumps.

You've mowed your lawn twice in one week.

You've cleaned snow/ice off of your car more than twice in one day.
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Old 12-16-2009, 08:20 AM
 
Location: NW Lower Michigan=Heaven!
3,859 posts, read 4,807,230 times
Reputation: 3125
I think he has been doing that for many years. I remember reading these same jokes years ago. Besides, you can do this with every state.
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Old 12-16-2009, 08:31 AM
 
Location: Grand Rapids Metro
7,228 posts, read 10,910,468 times
Reputation: 2531
Jeff Foxworthy is still around? Wow.
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Old 12-16-2009, 08:40 AM
 
Location: West Michigan
7,411 posts, read 3,012,677 times
Reputation: 3579
Quote:
Originally Posted by mkfarnam View Post
OP list
Very funny. I needed that today. Thanks for post it.
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Old 12-16-2009, 09:06 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma(formerly SoCalif) Originally Mich,
13,387 posts, read 9,606,825 times
Reputation: 4611
You know your in Michigan when:

The roads and Highways are lines with "Do not Pass" and "Pass With Care " signs.


All the deer/Deere and large wildlife have the right-of-way to the roads and highway.
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Old 12-16-2009, 09:10 AM
 
Location: NW Lower Michigan=Heaven!
3,859 posts, read 4,807,230 times
Reputation: 3125
You take your truck hunting...without a gun
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