[dragon_fly_12]

CPS is not involved yet, but they will be soon. The parents have applied for assistance, and, from what I'm told, that automatically involves CPS.

A little background... I have a cousin who is a real POS that won't work. He has fathered 4 children to the same woman whom he's married to. Because they are married, their aid options are already limited. His work options are very slim... He's a convicted felon (riding in the back of a pickup drunk and threw rocks at a cop car; sexual offender because his now wife was the age of 15 when she got pregnant, he was in his 20's). Her mother turned him in and he was convicted in Arkansas. His wife was actually his step sister that he lived with after getting out of prision for the rock throwing stunt. He is a convicted drunk with several DUI's (some with children riding with him). He's just a white trash loser.

Fast forward, they now have 4 children (last born this month), no jobs, no way to provide for what they've brought into this world. She has absolutely no skills and really needs to stay home with the kids. He's turned down jobs lined up through Michigan Works because they offered $8/hr and he believes he can make $20/hr as a professional painter. Problem is.. he can't keep a job because he keeps getting DUI's in the company owned vehicle. Opps. They've been evicted more times than I can count for non payment of rent. Their current place is a trailer that should be condemned in a mobile park that is the last resort type place for sex offenders. The trailer is 2bd and they legally can't live there with as many children, they are several months behind on rent, the electric / water / gas is shut off for non payment, and they are currently crashing in the spare room at my Grandmothers house for lack of other options. Yes, all 6 of them are staying in that room. My grandmother won't put up for it long, but she's trying to prevent them from taking refuge at the wife's monther's place in Arkansas. They would be sharing a house with wife's mother, husband, and 2 sons that are legally unable to provide for themselves or live independently, 1 of which has already sexually assaulted a child.

Oh, and said husb/wife team refuse to get "fixed" just in case they decide they need MORE KIDS. (at this point, I wish we the people of the community had the power to force castrations!)

A few members of my family are very tempted to call CPS on this situation. The wife refuses to let any of us take a child (or 2) to provide a better home. For instance, my DH and I are willing to take the oldest and maybe second oldest, both girls, and give them what they need. We have a home, income, stability and love to provide. I would, however, require legal guardianship so 1. kid(s) could have insurance, 2. they can't just come in and yank kid(s) out of my care when they felt like it. This whistle has not been blown yet mainly because of the backlash from Grandma - she is convinced the kids being in foster would be worse than what they have. At least foster requires heat, water and roof over their heads. We want to blow the whistle because the kids are not getting taken care of, he refuses to work, and they are taking advantage of the family. The kids are losing out big time.

If the whistle is blown on this family, my questions...
1. Do family members have the right to offer homes for children? What about out of state members (myself)?
2. Would it be annonymous?
3. Can we apply for guardianship without actually adopting?

Any thoughts on this situation?

[Tricia819]

As long as you're a blood relative I believe you have priority over children being placed in foster care. I have a cousin who adopted her POS brother's two children, and DH has a cousin who ended up adopting another cousin's youngest child. The only way you would be able to adopt them (even though you stated you didn't want to) was if the parents' parental rights were terminated anyway.

[MICoastieMom]

Even as a family member you will likely still be required to obtain a license as a foster parent. That means you will have to submit for an inspection from CPS, etc. as any other individual would. The state used to have provisions for emergency foster care to a fmaily member which put you on the fast track for getting qualified. I am not sure if any of those provisions have changed over the years. It would behoove you contact either the licensing agency or a child advocate attached to a law office or mental health/social worker.

[shazzer]

[quote=chance2jump;12594937]CPS is not involved yet, but they will be soon. The parents have applied for assistance, and, from what I'm told, that automatically involves CPS.


Have worked for the MI Department of Human Services for many years and CPS is not notified just because the parents apply for assistance. The only way CPS would be notified while applying for assistance is if one of the parents verbally told their DHS worker that the kids were being abused.

Parents applying for assistance, especially in MI's job market, in no way implies that a child is being abused. At this time, approximately 1 in 4 households in MI are receiving some form of assistance.

Having said that, it does sound like the family is having issues that would be a cause for concern. In order for CPS to be involved, the issues would have to be reported and can be done anonymously. It's a toss up if you want CPS involved. Sometimes being reported with the possibility of losing their children, scares the parents straight... And some time things wind up much worse. If the children were only temporarily removed, I seriously doubt the DHS worker would send two of the children to live with relatives in North Carolina, unless requested by the parents. Parental visitation is strongly encouraged while children are in temp foster care. If the parents still do not have their act together after approx 2 years parenal rights might be terminated and workers would want to place the children with relatives, adoption or long term foster care.

I can understand your cousins point of view. I don't know if I would voluntarily sign over two of my children to a cousin in another state with no option of getting them back even if their situation improved. You said your cousin doesn't have the skill set to find employment. MI does have some great training programs(medical assist, dental hygienist, etc) for people in your cousins situation. She can let the dad stay home with kids. If taking care of the kids motivates the dad to get a job, great. If not, your cousin still comes out ahead.

[shazzer]

[quote=chance2jump;12594937]CPS is not involved yet, but they will be soon. The parents have applied for assistance, and, from what I'm told, that automatically involves CPS.


Have worked for the MI Department of Human Services for many years and CPS is not notified just because the parents apply for assistance. The only way CPS would be notified while applying for assistance is if one of the parents verbally told their DHS worker that the kids were being abused.

Parents applying for assistance, especially in MI's job market, in no way implies that a child is being abused. At this time, approximately 1 in 4 households in MI are receiving some form of assistance.

Having said that, it does sound like the family is having issues that would be a cause for concern. In order for CPS to be involved, the issues would have to be reported and can be done anonymously. It's a toss up if you want CPS involved. Sometimes being reported with the possibility of losing their children, scares the parents straight... And some time things wind up much worse. If the children were only temporarily removed, I seriously doubt the DHS worker would send two of the children to live with relatives in North Carolina, unless requested by the parents. Parental visitation is strongly encouraged while children are in temp foster care. If the parents still do not have their act together after approx 2 years parenal rights might be terminated and workers would want to place the children with relatives, adoption or long term foster care.

I can understand your cousins point of view. I don't know if I would voluntarily sign over two of my children to a cousin in another state with no option of getting them back even if their situation improved. You said your cousin doesn't have the skill set to find employment. MI does have some great training programs(medical assist, dental hygienist, etc) for people in your cousins situation. She can let the dad stay home with kids. If taking care of the kids motivates the dad to get a job, great. If not, your cousin still comes out ahead.

Edited: Oops realized cousin's wife doesn't have skill set. However, same still applies

[dragon_fly_12]

This biggest issue with this situation is the lack of desire on the parents side. They believe if they keep the woe is me, the family will give in and pay their way. So far, its worked! Right?

The dad is a drunk that can't hold a job. He gets offered something through MI Works and he turns it down. The mom.. The family has been trying to motivate her for YEARS to get a skill set. Her sister in law, an RN that put herself through school and has made it happen for herself, got the mom started as an entry level assistant at a senior home and paid for her first semester of nursing school. The mom decided having a job was too hard and stopped showing up to work. Dropped out of school before finishing the 1st semester. My grandmother tried a second time and paid for a semester of classes... Same story. Mom doesn't want to work, she wants to sit back have someone else pay her way. She is a 3rd/4th generation welfare kid, so she never had employment demonstrated at home. So yes - while their situation could improve, they have to want it. And we're going on several years of track record of them NOT wanting it.

[shazzer]

Sorry, tough situation! Welfare to Work act was supposed to help put a stop in multi generation welfare recipients because recipients can only receive cash assistance for a limited time and are required to attend classes or job training while receiving assistance. Unfortunately, it doesn't always work. Doesn't sound like your family is eligible for that type of aid anyway.

Sounds like the family should probably be reported due to unsafe living conditions and hope for the best and hope the family doesn't moved to Arkansas. If they do move, report to Arkansas CPS right away! MI doesn't follow these cases past state lines and I would be extremely concerned with a child living with a child sex assault offender.

You could try talking the cousin into letting the two kids stay with you temporarily to lighten their load until the dad gets a job and talk about guardianship only in terms of insurance purposes. You can cross the bridge of the children back to MI when or even if it occurs. If the situation is as bad as you think there is a good chance the parents would leave the kids with you.

Good Luck!

[softheart34]

children in michigan can be placed in relative care but you need to make sure that CPS is aware that you are willing to take the child, then if the child is taken from the family they will do a back ground check on you and if you clear then they will most likely place the child with you, been in this type of situation and this is how it went with us

[dragon_fly_12]

Originally Posted by softheart34

children in michigan can be placed in relative care but you need to make sure that CPS is aware that you are willing to take the child, then if the child is taken from the family they will do a back ground check on you and if you clear then they will most likely place the child with you, been in this type of situation and this is how it went with us

Thanks for the info

[Driller1]

Originally Posted by chance2jump

Thanks for the info

How is this going???