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Old 10-24-2017, 04:23 PM
 
353 posts, read 89,235 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beachangel View Post
Something is wrong if a grown woman wants to see inside the casket and they wont allow it. Why isn't that her choice? This is terrible. Obviously she wants to make sure that he is inside that casket and I find it cruel not to let her or a family member see the body.
Everyone who has ever been in actual combat knows first hand exactly what "mans inhumanity to man" looks like.

A closed casket is more respectful than not......

( The men & women that do mortuary work are the unsung hero's that never get any recognition at all.)

 
Old 10-24-2017, 04:24 PM
 
Location: Richmond, VA
2,458 posts, read 3,956,889 times
Reputation: 3900
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts View Post
What is NOK? I keep seeing it on this thread!
Next of kin.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 04:27 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
11,166 posts, read 8,536,735 times
Reputation: 17765
Quote:
Originally Posted by GeorgiaTransplant View Post
Next of kin.
Thank you!
 
Old 10-24-2017, 05:19 PM
 
Location: Former LI'er Now a Rehoboth Beach Bunny
6,605 posts, read 8,294,931 times
Reputation: 5874
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rescue3 View Post
I've done this before.

Sometimes the condition of the remains is such that you recommend the family not view the body. The last time I did this, it was a gunshot wound to the face - the man was completely unrecognizable. In addition to the unspeakable gore that such violence wreaks upon the human body, we also take into consideration whether the last memory the next-of-kin has of their loved one is the bloody violence that took his or her life, not the smiling, happy kid they raised or married.

Still, it was, and always remains, the next-of-kin's decision.

My recollection of my last case is that the father still viewed the man's remains, but the rest of the family did not.

This also included cases were there literally isn't a body left - such as certain aircraft accidents or explosions. I know of cases where the remains were literally wet spots on the ground, which we collected. Again, the family was advised not to view the box of mud, but if they wanted to, we would arrange as dignified a setting as we could to allow them to do so.
This is correct. A family member of mine was responsible for cataloging deceased returning soldiers personal effects from their home and preparing it for return to the family. Every family is offered the ability to see their loved one, but the officer that accompanies the body will use language, that while offering that option may discourage it, as the above poster states due to the condition of the remains.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 05:28 PM
 
15,476 posts, read 7,887,288 times
Reputation: 14490
Quote:
Originally Posted by BucFan View Post
No Presidential call was made to any of their NOK.
And that only because Trump kneejerks to the media.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 05:30 PM
 
Location: North State (California)
4,876 posts, read 782,653 times
Reputation: 4232
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tampaite View Post
This might make some of us emotional but please stick to my question. Also, not trying to make any political discussion either based on the link below.

Link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/...ondolence-call



Question: Do they allow you to view the dead body of your loved ones in the casket or not? According to the article, they don't.

Why is it that families aren't allowed to view the dead body? it's seems completely illogical or can someone help me understand the logic. This has been bothering me since I'd assume that if any of my family members serve in the military, we will be given the right to view the dead body at the end just like in most of the other countries.

Physically viewing the body allows families closure.
Do you really have to ask!!
smh
 
Old 10-24-2017, 05:33 PM
 
Location: North State (California)
4,876 posts, read 782,653 times
Reputation: 4232
I don't think seeing a dead body brings closure, I have lost many older family members, some I saw in the casket, & with one aunt, it was closed casket, but the grief is the same.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 06:09 PM
 
Location: Tampa, FL
25,861 posts, read 21,707,326 times
Reputation: 12270
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralph_Kirk View Post
Each of them got the same military respect SGT Johnson has received. The only difference has been media focus, and that can happen as a result of varying different aspects not related to anything the military is doing with regard to the death.
thanks for clarifying

I used to get pretty angry/emotional about the loss of like in OEF, OIF but now that I've been out of the Army for nearly 9 yrs and it's been 12 yrs since my tour in Afghanistan, I'm pretty much emotionally blunted w/ what's going on anymore ----it's out of my control.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 06:20 PM
 
1,050 posts, read 2,479,437 times
Reputation: 737
Quote:
Originally Posted by evening sun View Post
I don't think seeing a dead body brings closure, I have lost many older family members, some I saw in the casket, & with one aunt, it was closed casket, but the grief is the same.
That's your opinion and what would bring closure in your opinion?

Am trying to stay on topic but let me ask you - would your grief be the same standing over an empty casket?
How do you know your one aunt was in the casket, cuz your uncle said so or some other family member said so...this isn't about your aunt we are talking - we are talking about your significant other! someone who may have been contributing financially, emotionally etc and losing them is irreplaceable.

I would place one's husband or wife (assuming you are married) higher than their aunt.
 
Old 10-24-2017, 06:25 PM
 
Location: North State (California)
4,876 posts, read 782,653 times
Reputation: 4232
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tampaite View Post
That's your opinion and what would bring closure in your opinion?

Am trying to stay on topic but let me ask you - would your grief be the same standing over an empty casket?
How do you know your one aunt was in the casket, cuz your uncle said so or some other family member said so...this isn't about your aunt we are talking - we are talking about your significant other! someone who may have been contributing financially, emotionally etc and losing them is irreplaceable.

I would place one's husband or wife (assuming you are married) higher than their aunt.

of course a spouse is of higher relationship than an aunt. I only mentioned her, as that is the only closed casket funeral I personally attended. I presume it was my Aunt, as the local coroner & police took her body.

Of course loosing a spouse, especailly under such awful circumstances, is awful. My heart goes out to the families in question.


I was answering the OP.
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