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Old 11-16-2017, 09:58 AM
 
3 posts, read 1,358 times
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My fiance is at his first station, which is in Japan, for the next few years, he is E-3 due to JROTC in high school and has applied for E-4, we find out next week if he gets it. We are trying to get married in January, but it may be held off until March due to not having as much time off saved up as he has already put in to take off, he will be short 4 days. He is suggesting flying me up there to get married at the very beginning of January, which our families are against, but it would set things into motion a lot sooner. He goes back out to sea in June, the thing is I don't know how long it would take to get me added to his orders and to get all the other paperwork done, I don't know how much stuff can be done when he is out to sea. Would it be better to fly me up there to get married or to wait until March?
I also want to know more about how to get housing in Japan as I know it can be very difficult, where could I stay if we have to wait?
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Old 11-16-2017, 10:04 AM
 
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Wait until he has everything worked out and he can come home to marry you. Study Japanese in the meantime.
Best wishes
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Old 11-16-2017, 10:32 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
30,776 posts, read 17,537,076 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hope45320918 View Post
My fiance is at his first station, which is in Japan, for the next few years, he is E-3 due to JROTC in high school and has applied for E-4, we find out next week if he gets it. We are trying to get married in January, but it may be held off until March due to not having as much time off saved up as he has already put in to take off, he will be short 4 days. He is suggesting flying me up there to get married at the very beginning of January, which our families are against, but it would set things into motion a lot sooner. He goes back out to sea in June, the thing is I don't know how long it would take to get me added to his orders and to get all the other paperwork done, I don't know how much stuff can be done when he is out to sea. Would it be better to fly me up there to get married or to wait until March?
I also want to know more about how to get housing in Japan as I know it can be very difficult, where could I stay if we have to wait?
If I were you, I'd wait until March.

Where do you want to live in Japan? Location matters. You can use local service like Sakura house (I am sure there are others), which caters to foreigners who don’t understand Japanese well enough to negotiate for an apartment. Find a real estate agency and go from there. It is quite simple.
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Old 11-16-2017, 11:04 AM
 
Location: Middle America
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He has access to all the information on base housing and any wait lists. Where he's stationed will matter, as far as housing availability.
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Old 11-16-2017, 02:44 PM
 
Location: New Mexico U.S.A.
23,553 posts, read 37,571,420 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hope45320918 View Post
My fiance is at his first station, which is in Japan, for the next few years, he is E-3 due to JROTC in high school and has applied for E-4, we find out next week if he gets it. We are trying to get married in January, but it may be held off until March due to not having as much time off saved up as he has already put in to take off, he will be short 4 days. He is suggesting flying me up there to get married at the very beginning of January, which our families are against, but it would set things into motion a lot sooner. He goes back out to sea in June, the thing is I don't know how long it would take to get me added to his orders and to get all the other paperwork done, I don't know how much stuff can be done when he is out to sea. Would it be better to fly me up there to get married or to wait until March?
I also want to know more about how to get housing in Japan as I know it can be very difficult, where could I stay if we have to wait?
If you are not married when you arrive in Japan, there will be a lot of benefits which will not be available to you.


Here are two US military installations websites pertaining to Japan:
MilitaryINSTALLATIONS - U.S. Department of Defense

https://www.cnic.navy.mil/regions/cn...d_lodging.html
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Old 11-16-2017, 03:58 PM
 
5,408 posts, read 7,358,472 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hope45320918 View Post
My fiance is at his first station, which is in Japan, for the next few years, he is E-3 due to JROTC in high school and has applied for E-4, we find out next week if he gets it. We are trying to get married in January, but it may be held off until March due to not having as much time off saved up as he has already put in to take off, he will be short 4 days. He is suggesting flying me up there to get married at the very beginning of January, which our families are against, but it would set things into motion a lot sooner. He goes back out to sea in June, the thing is I don't know how long it would take to get me added to his orders and to get all the other paperwork done, I don't know how much stuff can be done when he is out to sea. Would it be better to fly me up there to get married or to wait until March?
I also want to know more about how to get housing in Japan as I know it can be very difficult, where could I stay if we have to wait?
You wouldn’t go out to sea with him anyway. Plus you won’t be on his orders. It would impact the move and housing but that’s about it. I think from March to May you’ll be fine.
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Old 11-16-2017, 04:50 PM
 
6,986 posts, read 3,406,953 times
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May I ask what the rush is?

Have you considered waiting until after he completes his June deployment to get married?

As a former Navy wife myself, I can tell you from personal experience that it isn't much fun to be left on your own in a foreign country while your new husband deploys, especially if you've only been married a few months and don't yet have a support system of other Navy wives.

So, for what it is worth, my advice is: plan your wedding for after his deployment. That way you two can have more time together right after you get married. You'll be able to settle into married life -- and military wife life -- without the double stress of a deployment and being alone in a foreign country so soon after you get married.

If it's true love, waiting a little longer will be tough, sure, but it shouldn't be a huge problem. You'll be so busy planning your wedding at home and he'll be so busy on his ship while he's deployed that the time will fly by for both of you. And, truthfully, part of your job as a Navy wife will involve a lot of waiting to be together, so this is a good test to see if you are OK with that.

With luck and love, you guys will have the rest of your lives to be together. Start things off right.

Best wishes!


(P.S., the advice to wait to get married doesn't mean you can't fly over for a visit with him in March. )

Last edited by RosieSD; 11-16-2017 at 05:18 PM..
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Old 11-16-2017, 05:15 PM
 
779 posts, read 322,779 times
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Where do live now that puts Japan “up there”?
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Old 11-16-2017, 09:13 PM
 
3 posts, read 1,358 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RosieSD View Post
May I ask what the rush is?

Have you considered waiting until after he completes his June deployment to get married?

As a former Navy wife myself, I can tell you from personal experience that it isn't much fun to be left on your own in a foreign country while your new husband deploys, especially if you've only been married a few months and don't yet have a support system of other Navy wives.

So, for what it is worth, my advice is: plan your wedding for after his deployment. That way you two can have more time together right after you get married. You'll be able to settle into married life -- and military wife life -- without the double stress of a deployment and being alone in a foreign country so soon after you get married.

If it's true love, waiting a little longer will be tough, sure, but it shouldn't be a huge problem. You'll be so busy planning your wedding at home and he'll be so busy on his ship while he's deployed that the time will fly by for both of you. And, truthfully, part of your job as a Navy wife will involve a lot of waiting to be together, so this is a good test to see if you are OK with that.

With luck and love, you guys will have the rest of your lives to be together. Start things off right.

Best wishes!


(P.S., the advice to wait to get married doesn't mean you can't fly over for a visit with him in March. )
This isn't as much of a rush as it may seem, we've been planning this for a while and we keep having to move the date farther back, It's been over a year. I understand waiting is a part of this life, which is why I'm not scared or really that worried about waiting for him in Japan. I took Japanese classes for 4 years so I do know some of the language enough to not be so uncomfortable, I already know some of the differences between the culture as well. Are there no answers to the questions I asked?
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Old 11-16-2017, 09:15 PM
 
3 posts, read 1,358 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by Poncho_NM View Post
If you are not married when you arrive in Japan, there will be a lot of benefits which will not be available to you.


Here are two US military installations websites pertaining to Japan:
MilitaryINSTALLATIONS - U.S. Department of Defense

https://www.cnic.navy.mil/regions/cn...d_lodging.html
Thank you
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