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Old 04-05-2019, 04:37 PM
 
11,033 posts, read 8,129,032 times
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So you've both got some years of active duty under your belts.
There are many couples who are successful at it either way. And many kids who thrive in the military lifestyle.
If your driving factor is to stay near one location you should see what guy guard units are close by.
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Old 04-12-2019, 03:18 PM
 
6,872 posts, read 2,909,728 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Poncho_NM View Post
The two of you will determine which lifestyle is better for the family. It is not an easy choice, you might regret some of your choices at times. You need to be strong and stay together.

I was drafted into the Army, and I stayed in. I would do it again, with some changes. I would have stayed overseas longer and more often with the family. The kids enjoyed their American schools and environment in Germany. I should have applied for WO much earlier, every time I could have applied (I waited, to my loss...)

We saw many Army and Air Force "Dual Military" families. I was active duty, my wife was Federal Service.

"staying in our hometown"? Really? We got to see the world (not all of it, but a great experience). The family enjoyed their lives in Germany so much that I extended 6 months. You know what day you arrive and what day you leave when you are overseas. I held several MOS's.

It is impossible to predict the future, so you have to prepare for changes, which can happen no matter what you plan...

We owned three houses while I was active duty. Lucked out on that, worked out for the better.

After my 22 years active duty I became a self employed consultant.

Yes, we moved around a bit. The kids still talk about their moves and friends they made over the years.

Life is rough, try to make it as enjoyable as possible...

I retired as an Army 971A W2 in 1990 with no major regrets...

Good luck to you on your choice!

Added: After consulting with my Dear Wife of 50 years, she commented we have been Best Friends with a military family we met in Germany 42 years ago...
The issue with the military is some people end up with accompanied deployments to places like Germany and others end up 4 times back to back deployed to places like Iraq and it tears their families up. So itís a huge dice roll. So if you roll a 7 you can be like ak Eric, if you roll snake eyes it can be a super bad deal.
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Old 04-12-2019, 04:11 PM
 
1,533 posts, read 2,283,907 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pittsflyer View Post
The issue with the military is some people end up with accompanied deployments to places like Germany and others end up 4 times back to back deployed to places like Iraq and it tears their families up. So itís a huge dice roll. So if you roll a 7 you can be like ak Eric, if you roll snake eyes it can be a super bad deal.
I totally agree. Having a two person military family is playing with fire in today's world. I know two couples like this in the Navy and both are now going on three years of spending less than three months together as a family a year. One of my friends came back from deployment and his son didn't recognize him. That was kind of a problem when the mom was going on deployment the next year. I couldn't imagine why someone would willingly put children through something like that. It seems selfish to me.
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Old 04-12-2019, 07:28 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Pyramidsurf View Post
I totally agree. Having a two person military family is playing with fire in today's world. I know two couples like this in the Navy and both are now going on three years of spending less than three months together as a family a year. One of my friends came back from deployment and his son didn't recognize him. That was kind of a problem when the mom was going on deployment the next year. I couldn't imagine why someone would willingly put children through something like that. It seems selfish to me.
Or each other, I like spending time with my spouse. It almost seems predatory when people talk about these wonderful times they had in Germany without also talking about people going on back to back tours in Iraq.
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Old 04-12-2019, 11:21 PM
Status: "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em..." (set 2 days ago)
 
Location: Middle America
36,279 posts, read 41,068,151 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pyramidsurf View Post
I totally agree. Having a two person military family is playing with fire in today's world. I know two couples like this in the Navy and both are now going on three years of spending less than three months together as a family a year. One of my friends came back from deployment and his son didn't recognize him. That was kind of a problem when the mom was going on deployment the next year. I couldn't imagine why someone would willingly put children through something like that. It seems selfish to me.
This can happen without being AD, too, though.

We've got a reservist couple we're friendly with, guy is a longtime mess buddy of my husband's. He recently mobilized, leaving a month before his second child was due. So he'll miss most of the new baby's first year of life, as well as a year of his older son's, who is approaching three, and will actually remember him being gone. And that's a reserve CPO.
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Old 04-12-2019, 11:54 PM
 
6,872 posts, read 2,909,728 times
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Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
This can happen without being AD, too, though.

We've got a reservist couple we're friendly with, guy is a longtime mess buddy of my husband's. He recently mobilized, leaving a month before his second child was due. So he'll miss most of the new baby's first year of life, as well as a year of his older son's, who is approaching three, and will actually remember him being gone. And that's a reserve CPO.
I was referring to military vs no military at all, yes national guard and reserves are exposed to undesirable deployments as well.
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Old 04-13-2019, 12:19 AM
Status: "You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em..." (set 2 days ago)
 
Location: Middle America
36,279 posts, read 41,068,151 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pittsflyer View Post
I was referring to military vs no military at all, yes national guard and reserves are exposed to undesirable deployments as well.
Sorry, mine was more in direct response to pyramidsurf's post, and in relation to the "AD vs. Reserves" question angle of the OP.
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Old 04-13-2019, 03:40 AM
 
Location: Murrica
2,946 posts, read 1,669,553 times
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Germany is, for the majority, a PCS move and both members would go together.

Although Iraq and Afghanistan dominated the recent past, it could be a long time before similar circumstances happen again. Not all military careers are constant deployments.
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Old 04-13-2019, 12:50 PM
 
6,872 posts, read 2,909,728 times
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Originally Posted by m1a1mg View Post
Germany is, for the majority, a PCS move and both members would go together.

Although Iraq and Afghanistan dominated the recent past, it could be a long time before similar circumstances happen again. Not all military careers are constant deployments.
Itís why I cut my national gaurd time short and never entertained going active.
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Old 04-13-2019, 01:16 PM
 
Location: Wasilla, AK
6,831 posts, read 3,810,885 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by m1a1mg View Post
Germany is, for the majority, a PCS move and both members would go together.

Although Iraq and Afghanistan dominated the recent past, it could be a long time before similar circumstances happen again. Not all military careers are constant deployments.
Quote:
Originally Posted by pittsflyer View Post
Itís why I cut my national gaurd time short and never entertained going active.
Apparently it's all about you. When the going gets tough, you just quit. Not something I would brag about in a military forum.
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