family life in the navy (stationed, apartment, home, worth)

[mandy1213]

My boyfriend is being stationed in Charleston in about a year and we are debating whether or not it is worth me going with him or not. It has a great school for me to transfer to and what not but if I am never going to see him it will be hard. Anyone have any intake or experience with family life in the navy?

[Balad1]

Originally Posted by mandy1213

My boyfriend is being stationed in Charleston in about a year and we are debating whether or not it is worth me going with him or not. It has a great school for me to transfer to and what not but if I am never going to see him it will be hard. Anyone have any intake or experience with family life in the navy?

I think you'll have to expand on what he does in the Navy to get an answer that will help you. Is he normally shore based, ship, aviation, etc?

[Submariner]

During my 20+ year Naval career; I did 14 years of 'sea-duty', and 6 years of shore-duty.

My sea-duty was typically 7 months gone each year. By 'gone' I mean no contact, no phone calls, no letters, gone. The remaining 5 months of each of those years, I lived at home with my family, and was usually attending schools or trainers, 6 to 8 hour shifts, Monday - Friday, and nearly every weekend was off.

My shore-duty was rotating shift-work. 12 on / 12 off, one month of days / one month of nights, with 6 days completely 'off' each month. But later as I became middle management my 'off' days commonly required making trips in to work for a couple hours.

IMHO, from my observations, if you two are a 'party' couple, you will hate it and you will leave him. Sorry, I know this sounds blunt and rude.

'We' bought an apartment building at nearly every duty station, which my Dw managed. It kept her busy and active. She owned a laundromat at one duty station, a catering service at another. 'We' were also foster-parents, though admittedly my Dw did most of it. 'We' were active with 4H with our children.

If you can busy yourself, and be independent like that. then you will be seen as a tower of strength and stability among the wives' club.

Honestly, if your guy is going to be gone or busy as much as I was; then the only way for it to work well, is for you to be busy.

Careers are very hard for wives to do. Moving to a new duty station every 3 to 4 years is rough on corporate ladder climbing. Which is why my 'we' chose for her to do all of those independent things.

Good luck

If you have any further questions feel free to PM me

[Balad1]

Originally Posted by forest beekeeper

During my 20+ year Naval career; I did 14 years of 'sea-duty', and 6 years of shore-duty.

My sea-duty was typically 7 months gone each year. By 'gone' I mean no contact, no phone calls, no letters, gone. The remaining 5 months of each of those years, I lived at home with my family, and was usually attending schools or trainers, 6 to 8 hour shifts, Monday - Friday, and nearly every weekend was off.

My shore-duty was rotating shift-work. 12 on / 12 off, one month of days / one month of nights, with 6 days completely 'off' each month. But later as I became middle management my 'off' days commonly required making trips in to work for a couple hours.

IMHO, from my observations, if you two are a 'party' couple, you will hate it and you will leave him. Sorry, I know this sounds blunt and rude.

'We' bought an apartment building at nearly every duty station, which my Dw managed. It kept her busy and active. She owned a laundromat at one duty station, a catering service at another. 'We' were also foster-parents, though admittedly my Dw did most of it. 'We' were active with 4H with our children.

If you can busy yourself, and be independent like that. then you will be seen as a tower of strength and stability among the wives' club.

Honestly, if your guy is going to be gone or busy as much as I was; then the only way for it to work well, is for you to be busy.

Careers are very hard for wives to do. Moving to a new duty station every 3 to 4 years is rough on corporate ladder climbing. Which is why my 'we' chose for her to do all of those independent things.

Good luck

If you have any further questions feel free to PM me

Excellent advice

[North Beach Person]

Originally Posted by Balad1

Excellent advice

Ditto.

The Navy is probably the hardest on family life even in peacetime. The sea duty, which is what the Navy is about, ensures long stretches away from home. Then you have guys that like sea duty (especially aviators) so they try to catch on anywhere they can to keep flying.