Should I stay or should I go? (Nicollet, Dakota: transfer, quality of life)

[nick is rulz]

Originally Posted by golfgal

San Diego--have a couple million dollars to buy a 2 br 700 sq foot house??? Earthquakes, high, high, high cost of living, crime, bad schools

uhhh San Diego is one of the safest large cities in the country, so I have no clue where you came up with the idea that its crime ridden.

Its main issue is traffic. Absolutely horrible, and mass transit in SD is awful.

[lizabeth]

WannaBeinBoston - I grew up in MN for 27 yrs & moved to Sacramento, CA in 2001. My husband, two kids & I are moving back to MN in two months to "raise our family" (yes, my only concrete concern is the winter too). I've found people that leave the midwest often return to raise their own kids - I feel this says a great deal about the values & quality of life of Minnesota other parts of the country may lack.... My parents live in Sacramento & being an only child I have to say goodbye & take their two only grandchildren 1800 miles away. It's very difficult, but I had such a wonderful childhood in St. Paul, I feel a great need & want to give back to my children. To answer your question - yes, people do move to the Twin Cities for reasons other than family/friends; those being are education, careers & the uniqueness of the area. How many other places in the country have two cities 10 miles apart? MN isn't perfect, some of the people are clannish & the winters can be horrible. BUT pick your poision - you will have other downfalls in different parts of the country as well as MN. The real question is in your heart / gut. Where do you really want to be? Sometimes (because I had to) a person has to take logic & finances out of the picture and think about what they want. I'm an example of leaving immediate family to return to the Twin Cities because of the value I feel it holds for my children. This may not be true or right for you, but deciding what you want first should help. Life is TOO short to continue living somewhere you aren't happy ....

[WannaBeinBoston]

Liz and others thank you for your post, both commenting on misperceptions of other areas and of the quality that MN has to offer. I have done extensive research of those other cities and Liz you're right, it comes down to where we feel most comfortable. There are certainty good and bad about every place.

[TheseGoTo11]

Minneapolis is actually warmer than Boston in the spring, avg high right now is 3 degrees higher. I've lived in Boston, and trust me, you'd be inside just as much, and possibly longer because of its damp, icy, cold spring.

[TheseGoTo11]

I had a great job offer in Dallas than I turned down, even though cost of housing there is insanely low. If you need access to any sort of vibrant downtown or neighborhood, Dallas makes Minneapolis look like midtown Manhattan.

Richmond's 110 miles from DC, which is growing to the south, and the two areas aren't that far from merging. Richmond is much cheaper than Washington, and even the southern DC suburbs that are within 60 miles of Richmond are much cheaper than the suburbs west of Washington because of all the high paying jobs near Dulles airport.

Much of the city of Richmond is industrial or dangerous, but it does have a few interesting, pedestrian neighborhoods near downtown, particularly Shockoe Bottom, and also just to the west around the VCU campus. More interesting a place than Atlanta, Charlotte, or some of the newer minivan paradises to its south. Weather is nice too. They only had 8/10ths of an inch of snow all season this year, although we had just 5 inches all season in Washington.

[LaceyEx]

Our move here 3 yrs. ago was the biggest mistake of our lives. Our kids, grandkids are all on the East Coast and it's horrible being sofar away.

My DH is originally from MN, has family here but it's not the same and he's more adament than me about moving back East. Hopefully we can sell and re-locate soon.

[flindras]

Originally Posted by golfgal

Honestly, no, I am not exaggerating at all. Check out the housing prices for San Diego and what you can get there. Same thing with the Boston area. As for the Boston traffic, how can ANYONE argue that it is not horrid--have you driven in Boston??? The point I was making is that there are good and bad things about everywhere and you seem to be focused on the winter weather in Minnesota and not looking at the other positives.

I've lived cities bigger than the Twin Cities. I still cannot get over the EASE of life in this area. There are really no problems. Go elsewhere, and you will definitely see the difference.

[gopher38]

Well, when someone asks in an MSP forum why anyone would want to live here, my first reaction is that he is trolling, but since that doesn't seem to be the case, here's my take.

First, I'd think a bit more about why you want to move. I don't think it's clear for you, because your list of potential cities is so far-ranging. I mean, are there two major American cities more different than Dallas and Boston? I don't think so. Your true reason might have nothing to do with the city at all, but rather your situation there. You may be sitting in a non-descript housing complex in a Mpls suburb, and picture yourself living in Beacon Hill, walking to work and sipping cappuccinos at the neighborhood coffee shop. Unfortunately, you might make the move out to the Boston area and find yourself in a non-descript housing complex there, because Beacon Hill was too expensive. Or find yourself living in Beacon Hill, but your quality of life sucks because you're commuting 3 hours a day to your job on route 128. If you want to live in a certain type of neighborhood or have a certain lifestyle, you might well be able to find it easier in the Twin Cities. Or perhaps you're just bored and you think that moving will spice things up. Maybe you're wasting too much time commuting and need to find a job closer to home and then use that time to take Spanish or drawing class. Just seems like I've had a lot of friends that move someplace because they've hit a lull in life, and they have fun in the new city for 6 months while they get to play the new kid in town at dinner parties, and chose a new grocery store, etc. But then eventually they have the same issues as before.

Personally, I think that just about any city can be enjoyable. If you put 2 or 3 million people in a place, there will be enough bright, motivate, creative people that they will come up with interesting things to do (music, plays, sports facilities, etc). What's that saying about people being as happy as they make their minds up to be? Yeah, maybe city X is marginally more interesting than city Y, but I don't care what city you're living in, you're not taking advantage of all it has to offer. Also, regarding the difficulty of meeting people, I think that that has more to do with age than the city itself. It's easy to meet people in EVERY city when you arrive with a bunch of college kids or just after college, and everyone is trying to party and hook up. It's much harder when they are mid 30's and 40's and wrapped up in careers and family. I'm always wary of posts saying that people in city X or Y are cold and hard to get to know.

All that said, I think Mpls is a good city for a "jack-of-all-trades" type person. You know, it's never the absolute top in anything, but you can do just about everything to some degree here. For instance, people out West would laugh at the skiing in Mpls, and it's true that, if you're looking to win the Olympic downhill, you'd probably want to be in the mountains. But there aren't many major American cities where you can be on the slopes (albeit small) 20 minutes after leaving your office. Or windsurfing. If you want to be the next Rob Naish, you'll probably go to Hawaii. But there are lots of nice windsurfing lakes in the state and even in the Twin Cites. And the mountain biking isn't world class, but there are trails all over the metro area. You can't golf all year round, but we have an abundance of affordable good courses. In theater, we're not NY, but one of the better cities in America. The music scene has its ups and downs, but it's produced more than its fair share of quality groups. And so on and so forth.

I can definitely see moving someplace to be closer to family. You only have one Mom and Dad, and there's something special about siblings. And I can understand if someone is just wacko over golf wanting to move to Phoenix or something. But if it's just moving to move, I might try to improve your situation where you are now first.

[icewater]

I think staying in the TCs is maybe a better option. It sounds as if you have a pretty good thing going; and you'd switch it all for the Weather? Move to Dallas (which doesn't have the standard of living) and it's warmer but maybe too warm and yeah sure your kid can play outside, but outside doesn't seem so safe since the warm weather means the undesirable elements aren't kept in check by the cold. Or maybe you can't afford comparable living in San Diego so you're in a lesser neighborhood than back in MN.
But certainly if your gut feeling is to move then follow that. The state will be around if it doesn't pan out. Or there will be other options. It sounds as if you could get along decently wherever you end up, so why not take a chance. Just not on Dallas. Try Austin.

[typical_guinea_pig]

gopher -- great post. Very insightful.