Has increasing ethnic diversity in MN affected Minnesota Nice? (Minneapolis: fit in, home)

[JenLee]

Originally Posted by Dingler

30 years ago the lack of racial diversity in town gave one less reason for people to dislike each other. And the comfort of everyone coming from the same race gave us a reason to be comfortable and like each other.

Bah, Humbug! I grew up in a small northern MN town where everyone was white and they found OTHER reasons to dislike each other! People will like or dislike others whether they are the same color or not; there are so many OTHER things that make us diverse such as cultures, religions, and politics!

I'm old enough that when someone mentions a "mixed" marriage I still first think they mean a Catholic marrying a Protestant!

People don't become more tolerant of others if they only live with those that are exactly like themselves (which is what your statement seems to imply to me).

[pirate_lafitte]

Man! My view of Minnesota is changing from these posts. My mother was in college in Minnepolis during the 1980's and she said she never had problems as a black woman. My own father says Minnesota(and Wisconsin) are more progressive than Georgia(based on his experience).I read books about Minnesota. Those views made me want to live in Minnesota(the Twin Cities anyway). Then again, I also want to talk to people and not be resentful of a place that I would move to.
What kind of insight is there for anyone who is considering MN as a new place of residence(I have considered it since I was a teenager)?
As for Minnesota nice, I just want to live near good neighbors and people with a sense of love for one another.
Hopefully, the few people who are ignorant don't spoil anyone's stay in MN.

[chilaili]

Minnesota Nice to me never meant actually being nice to one another. I lived there 10 years and realised after the first 6-12 months that all Minnesota Nice meant was a) never being honest with someone, b) telling someone what you think they want to hear and c) never ever letting an outsider into your little clique of family and friends but being oh so polite to them the rest of the time. Thankfully over the years I did meet several Minnesotans who did not conform to this culture and made me feel welcome and wanted, rather than a pariah. Maybe the reason some of the immigrants don't mingle or talk is because they sense they're not really wanted? So why bust a gut trying to make friends with people who smile with their mouths but never their eyes?

[K-Luv]

Originally Posted by chilaili

Minnesota Nice to me never meant actually being nice to one another. I lived there 10 years and realised after the first 6-12 months that all Minnesota Nice meant was a) never being honest with someone, b) telling someone what you think they want to hear and c) never ever letting an outsider into your little clique of family and friends but being oh so polite to them the rest of the time. Thankfully over the years I did meet several Minnesotans who did not conform to this culture and made me feel welcome and wanted, rather than a pariah. Maybe the reason some of the immigrants don't mingle or talk is because they sense they're not really wanted? So why bust a gut trying to make friends with people who smile with their mouths but never their eyes?

Exactly my view as well.

[pirate_lafitte]

Originally Posted by chilaili

Minnesota Nice to me never meant actually being nice to one another. I lived there 10 years and realised after the first 6-12 months that all Minnesota Nice meant was a) never being honest with someone, b) telling someone what you think they want to hear and c) never ever letting an outsider into your little clique of family and friends but being oh so polite to them the rest of the time. Thankfully over the years I did meet several Minnesotans who did not conform to this culture and made me feel welcome and wanted, rather than a pariah. Maybe the reason some of the immigrants don't mingle or talk is because they sense they're not really wanted? So why bust a gut trying to make friends with people who smile with their mouths but never their eyes?

What does this mean for someone who is seriously considering MN as a new residence who happens to be black and who wants to be part of MN(who likes it over the state he currently lives in now.)?
As for Minnesota nice, I want just plain old nice and friendly, good neighbors.

[JenLee]

Minnesota Nice means we aren't going to stick our noses in your business.

If you are friendly to the majority of Minnesotans, they are friendly to you. If you TRY to force yourself on them; they won't let you into their lives.

But if you are genuinely friendly, then you will be accepted. If you want plain old nice and friendly neighbors, Pirate, then you will probably find them here. Many people will talk to strangers at coffee shops, walking around the lakes, etc. As long as it is kept light and friendly, then people will talk to you.

On the other hand, if you come here with a chip on your shoulder (as some people sound like in the majority of their posts here); you will probably find it a lot less friendly here.

My kids don't see different races or colors here except when it comes to the absence of diversity they occasionally find in different places.

[kuan]

I look around at my neigbors and wonder, where has Minnesota culture gone? Nobody around here can teach me how to make lefse, nobody speaks Swedish or Norwegian, my neighbors are all fat and don't ski. Fishing is the only thing we have in common.

Don't blame immigrants for losing your culture.

[JenLee]

Kuan, that's a good reminder for all of us.

I have a vaguely Scandinavian name; but don't have any Scandinavian heritage or ancestors even though I grew up here in Minnesota. BUT I *do* claim a Scandinavian (Minnesota) culture; and I can tell you where to go to learn how to make lefse (or where to buy what *I* consider the best!), or where to go to learn to speak Swedish or Norwegian!

I'm not blonde and tall (but also not short and fat), nor do I ski anymore (ruined my knees in my youth); I don't enjoy fishing but I love to eat fish!

What I'm trying to say is that maybe I don't fit the "typical" Minnesotan in anyone's mind; but since I grew up here, I still am part of the culture here. There isn't a "typical" Minnesotan; just as there is no such thing as an "average" teenager. But others make assumptions that ALL Minnesotans are the same.

[pirate_lafitte]

Originally Posted by JenLee

Kuan, that's a good reminder for all of us.

I have a vaguely Scandinavian name; but don't have any Scandinavian heritage or ancestors even though I grew up here in Minnesota. BUT I *do* claim a Scandinavian (Minnesota) culture; and I can tell you where to go to learn how to make lefse (or where to buy what *I* consider the best!), or where to go to learn to speak Swedish or Norwegian!

I'm not blonde and tall (but also not short and fat), nor do I ski anymore (ruined my knees in my youth); I don't enjoy fishing but I love to eat fish!

What I'm trying to say is that maybe I don't fit the "typical" Minnesotan in anyone's mind; but since I grew up here, I still am part of the culture here. There isn't a "typical" Minnesotan; just as there is no such thing as an "average" teenager. But others make assumptions that ALL Minnesotans are the same.

How insightful. Actually, growing up in GA, I never see that much snow and I always envisioned myself in Minnesota ice fishing, tobboganing, playing in the snow and being around nice genuine people who also love the snow and winter weather. As for Scandinavian culture, I have always wanted to go to Norway, Sweden, and Finland because of some of the things in those cultures(I am a fan of Varttina, a Finnish folk group). As far as I see, there are very lovely things in Minnesota.

[pirate_lafitte]

Originally Posted by JenLee

Minnesota Nice means we aren't going to stick our noses in your business.

If you are friendly to the majority of Minnesotans, they are friendly to you. If you TRY to force yourself on them; they won't let you into their lives.

But if you are genuinely friendly, then you will be accepted. If you want plain old nice and friendly neighbors, Pirate, then you will probably find them here. Many people will talk to strangers at coffee shops, walking around the lakes, etc. As long as it is kept light and friendly, then people will talk to you.

On the other hand, if you come here with a chip on your shoulder (as some people sound like in the majority of their posts here); you will probably find it a lot less friendly here.

My kids don't see different races or colors here except when it comes to the absence of diversity they occasionally find in different places.

Very insightful. I have only been to MN once(June 1992) and it was to visit my family. They seem to like it. Perhaps it is time for me to start traveling again(when I get the money lol) and go to these places I always envisioned as great places.