Rochester: Friendly or Minnesota "nice"? (Badger: fit in, transplants)

[TootsieWootsie]

Since people are coming in and out of Rochester for Mayo Clinic, I would assume that the natives would be friendly to those from out-of-town. True or not?
Or would your guess be that it would be just so hard in Rochester to make friends as I am reading about the Twin Cities?
Other than this worry, Rochester is a fantastic town to move to; but, I would hate to stick myself in a town that was really hard to make friends in.

[fromupthere]

I think it's like any city anywhere - there are friendly people and there are unfriendly people. I think the Minnesota Nice stuff is overdone and people need to forget that campaign.

There is definitely more diversity and people coming and going due to Mayo. When I first moved down here I felt like I wanted to leave since I wasn't making any friends. I would chat with people when I was at the store or at school, but I wasn't really making friends - more like acquaintances. However, once I made a friend, the others just sort of fell into place too. Of the good friends I have made here, only one is from here originally.

I think a lot of Minnesotans can be reserved (in any part of the state). I find most people here to be friendly although not always courteous. I grew up in NE MN and if someone held the door for you or you for them, there was always a thank you. When at a door if someone coming from behind, the door is held for that individual - even if it means taking a few seconds to wait. Down here, that just doesn't happen very often. An example would be I was going to Barnes and Noble a while back with a double stroller. I was using the exterior entrance so there were just the 2 doors. I was holding a door open with one hand and pushing the stroller through with the other. Meanwhile some people were coming out the door. They stood and waited there while I did this so they could go out the door I was holding open for myself. This seems very common here - people don't want to open doors for themselves or anyone else. Yes, this is a huge pet peeve of mine so that's why I bring it up. Maybe to most people it's no big deal, but I find it extremely irritating.

[TootsieWootsie]

Like you said, there are so many people coming in and out for Mayo's you have no idea if they are locals or not.
My experience, which is only a brief visit, of Minnesota was the people are polite and courteous. But my visit was very brief.

[BadgerGrl]

This is tainted with my own experiences here, but ppl here are very passive-aggressive. They will act super nice to your face and stab you in the back when you're not looking. Sorry to sound so bitter, but that's been my experience! It can happen anywhere though, so I wouldn't wrote off MN completely.

[TootsieWootsie]

Isn't that the description of Minnesota nice, BadgerGrl? Sounds like what I found from the natives in Texas, by the way. Really phoney often....and they still hate Yankees, by the way. The Civil War will never be over in the South I think.

[BadgerGrl]

Originally Posted by TootsieWootsie

Isn't that the description of Minnesota nice, BadgerGrl? Sounds like what I found from the natives in Texas, by the way. Really phoney often....and they still hate Yankees, by the way. The Civil War will never be over in the South I think.

Yeah, I guess that would be the basic definition. I don't know which is worse--someone going behind your back, or being rude right to your face. At least this way you can pretend it doesn't exist!

[mapster]

I just moved to Rochester at the end of January. In my limited experience, the people here are very friendly. Most of our immediate surround neighbors have come over to introduce themselves and one couple even brought fresh homemade cookies as a welcome to the neighborhood.

I am a SAHM, so have limited social interaction with the general public, but really can't complain. So far, I love Rochester and all of my interactions with the people here have been positive ones. (parents at school, service people, etc.)

[Acer19]

Originally Posted by BadgerGrl

Yeah, I guess that would be the basic definition. I don't know which is worse--someone going behind your back, or being rude right to your face. At least this way you can pretend it doesn't exist!

Actually, you tend to get both of those things in Minnesota.

After being here for eight years though I have learned how people from Minnesota think and act. I think I fit in now rather well. I learned what to do and what not to do here. Once I learned how things worked here, things have turned out pretty good. I have lived in many states and Minnesota by far was the hardest to adjust too that is for sure.

[cdubs3201]

If Rochester has enough non-MN people, I'd say try to find those people and make friend with them.

From my experience of growing up in MN, and then living in a large metro area that has a LOT of transplants, the transplant people from other parts of the country make much better friends. They're more reliable, loyal, and fun than the friends you'll make that are minnesotans. Depends on what you're interests are, but I've always learned from my experience that minnesotans just don't know how to have fun.

[uptown_urbanist]

Whenever a topic like this pops up on this forum I am always (despite knowing better) surprised to see the level of general nastiness towards native Minnesotans that pops up; perhaps those suggesting that people from every other part of the country are across-the-board more "reliable, loyal, and fun" than Minnesotans, or that Minnesotans are all superficial, cold, and whatever other stereotypes you want to throw our way, should look at the mirror and realize that most people - regardless of state or country of birth - don't find it fun to hang out with people who peg them with rude stereotypes based on broad generalizations. I often tend to have more in common with people who have lived in a variety of places simply because we have some shared experiences with moving somewhere new, but that doesn't mean that I (or anyone) can't also have different shared experiences or interests with people who have always lived in the same place.

I think it is tougher to make friends in MN than it is in many places, but I've lived in five states outside of MN (on both coasts and in several different regions, and in varying sizes) and it can be difficult anywhere. I think in general it is easier in a city than it is in a smaller town, and probably easier in the city than in a suburb.

But really, when it comes down to it, while there are cultural differences between different regions of the country, people are essentially the same everywhere. Some are nice, some are not. Minnesotans are not any "nicer" (real or fake) than those elsewhere.